January November December

[sentimentality]

lonely
winter
january
november
december

outside
the cold hugs my face
maybe
it wants to be my friend
maybe
sometimes its ok
most of the time
i choose to be
sometimes
i'm embarrased
most of the time
i'm indifferent
listless
to loneliness
it just became
a second nature

lonely
winter
january
november
december

inside
i roam the hallways
smiling at everyting
as if i'm advertising myself
as if
i held a billboard by my side
just yelling
be my friend
lethargic
in class
to pass time
i roam the halls
and roam through
a pile of thoughts

after i try to talk
to the people
i've come to know
within the past year
but they act like
i'm their biggest fear
so instead i walk
away

bathroom
tears play
behind my eyes
waiting anxiously
like elementary kids
for recess
tears
its like the only thing
to kiss my cheeks
and nothing
is the only thing
to take my hand

lonely
winter
january
november
december

after i cry
i look at the mirror
not in
because i see the ghost
that has become of me
maybe thats why their scared
they don't wanna
become invisible
like me

and i can't cope with the jealousy
of other people's liveliness
lonely
winter
january
november
decembe