Judgement

[Paranoid Android]

So, after talking with my therapist for a while, I agree with him that I judge people way too much. It's something to with my incredibly low self esteem, though I'm not sure why. It's always physical appearances: "Oh, he looks like a meathead jock" or "Oh, she looks like a ditzy bitch". I don't think this is a healthy thing to do and I think it may be keeping me from establishing relationships. How do I not judge people based on what I think they might be?

 

[PrinceOfPeace]

Sometimes we judge people because were not happy with ourselves, sometimes its because of the way we have been treated in the past or the way we have been brought up, it can become a defence mechinisim that the sub conscious uses as a way of coping with inner issues, its like seeing someone and labling them a certain way straight off the bat to justify not wanting to know them or have anything to do with them for fear of them hurting or judging you. The key to changing this way of thinking is simply just to love, give love, share love & be loved

 

[Susana]

So, after talking with my therapist for a while, I agree with him that I judge people way too much. It's something to with my incredibly low self esteem, though I'm not sure why. It's always physical appearances: "Oh, he looks like a meathead jock" or "Oh, she looks like a ditzy bitch". I don't think this is a healthy thing to do and I think it may be keeping me from establishing relationships. How do I not judge people based on what I think they might be?

It's difficult to change the way you think especially if you have been thinking in that specific way for so long. Seeing a therapist is a great idea and if I was you, I'd keep going until you have a break-through. We all judge other people and things, it's a human thing, it's how we differentiate between good and bad - it stems from judgement and it this sense there is nothing wrong with it. However, in your case if you are judging people just for the sake of habit, it's exactly that - just habit. And you need to break that habit. Be conscience of the fact that you do this and each time you begin to start judging just throw it out of your head, talk to yourself and tell yourself that you wouldn't like anyone to be judging you and your appearance it's going to be hard but it's possible. Don't give up!