Luna said:
Love... being in love is good and bad and at same time, even if you are not the only one in love. At least with me nothing was forever and the end really hurts. Doesnt matter how much you loved each other cause things change and the best we can do is just let the other person go. I just loved 3 times in my whole life and was lucky to have the guys that i loved for at least 3 years each. Now im taking a break but soon i will look for someone to be happy with me and then make me cry a river lol
I just recently seperated, and in the process of getting a divorce.
I feel so hollow inside. I learned I had been lied to for quite some time, and that my marriage was basically a lie.
I loved my wife very much. I did everything I could to keep us together, keep our family together, but I couldn't do it. When I learned I had been lied to, I realized the woman I loved didn't exist, it was a farce. I can't even describe how that feels. I think some of you may know.
I used to think I couldn't live without love. But a part of me thinks I really can't live WITH love. Why does it hurt so much?! If I meet someone later, and fall in love, will this happen again? I don't think I can risk it happening again. It HURTS too much!!
This is going to sound really stupid, but I have SO MUCH LOVE to give and sometimes I feel like I'm going to explode and die because I don't have anyone to love now. I just want someone to love who will snuggle w/ me on the couch and watch movies, or snuggle in bed (I've had very bad experiences with *** so that's not such a great thing for me right now) someone to just BE with, to talk to. To be there for her, to comfort her when she's sad and to laugh with and go to fun places and live life together. Crap. Now I'm REALLY depressed.
I feel like I can't ever put myself in that position again, because when I do I will only be a target to get hurt again. Love is a paradox and I don't know what to do. To love is to risk losing everything, and to never love again is to me a living death. Someone help me sort this out please!
Sorry if I sounded stupid but I had to get that out. This is a really shabby, pathetic state of mind to be in.