LonerOnWheels
New member
Hello
I’m sorry if it seems like I’m giving a lot of information away about myself, I really like to talk. The only problem is I never have anyone to talk to. My name is Isaac. I am a 20 year old male that live at home with my family. I am currently attending a community college, but am aimlessly attending classes with no major chosen and no goal set in place for my future. I absolutely hate going to school. I’m not bad at it, but I’m not necessarily great at it either. I’d like to think that I am very intelligent but what holds me back is motivation and laziness. Unfortunetly getting a degree in something is my only way to try and get a job and have a set career. You see I am not able to do manual labor or jobs that have to do with anything with a lot of movement. I am bound to a wheelchair. I have a disease called spinal muscular atrophy. Basically since birth, this disease causes the muscles in my body to deteriorate/atrophy. Up until I was about 13 years old I was able to stand up and walk very short distances. And as I grow older I will end up losing more and more of my physical strength. At the moment I have use of my hands. I am able to use my arms but am not able to lift more than 5 pounds and cannot raise them above my head without assistance. You get the point, anyways; my focus right now it to try and get a degree in computer programming. I hope to be able to find a job as a programmer for a huge gaming company ( I know I’m a real geek.
but what can I say, i gotta find a job that I will be able to do once I lose muscles in my arms.) and buy a house in my home state.
So that’s basically my education life with a little bit of some personal stuff. But the reason I am here is most likely the same reason those of you reading are here. I am a very lonely person. Unfortunately since the beginning of last year any social life I once had has gone down the toilet. I have 1 friend who comes over to my house and we hang out for a little bit to play games and have a good laugh. Other than him I have 1 other friend who joined the army and we play Xbox together on occasion. I hardly ever leave home and when I do it’s always to either a doctor’s appointment or to school.
My relationship status is even worse off than my social life. I’ve never had a girlfriend in my entire life. And not for a lack of trying. A lot of girls I find are intimidated by me. For most they are usually afraid I’ll run them over. I don’t know that I’ve ever been noticed for me and not for my wheelchair. A lot of people don’t believe me and say that girls notice me and not just because of the chair. I find that those people are very delusional. Unless you have gone out in public and had people stare at you for uneasy amounts of time, have children ask their parents “why is that boy in a chair”, or come up to you and ask, “what’s wrong with you” . I know that they are just children and they are just curious. But after a while It begins to chips away at you, at your soul, and over time it become hard to go outside because you become so self-conscious that you’d rather stay inside locked away in your room than to go outside.
I just need a friend. I need someone who I can talk to, to let out all this emotion that’s pent up inside me. Otherwise I know that it will break me one day. So if you feel that you can talk to me, please don’t be afraid. I don’t mind if you ask me questions, trust me I doubt that there is anything that I haven’t been asked before. I can be a pretty open person. I just need someone i can be open with. anyways Thank you for reading.
I’m sorry if it seems like I’m giving a lot of information away about myself, I really like to talk. The only problem is I never have anyone to talk to. My name is Isaac. I am a 20 year old male that live at home with my family. I am currently attending a community college, but am aimlessly attending classes with no major chosen and no goal set in place for my future. I absolutely hate going to school. I’m not bad at it, but I’m not necessarily great at it either. I’d like to think that I am very intelligent but what holds me back is motivation and laziness. Unfortunetly getting a degree in something is my only way to try and get a job and have a set career. You see I am not able to do manual labor or jobs that have to do with anything with a lot of movement. I am bound to a wheelchair. I have a disease called spinal muscular atrophy. Basically since birth, this disease causes the muscles in my body to deteriorate/atrophy. Up until I was about 13 years old I was able to stand up and walk very short distances. And as I grow older I will end up losing more and more of my physical strength. At the moment I have use of my hands. I am able to use my arms but am not able to lift more than 5 pounds and cannot raise them above my head without assistance. You get the point, anyways; my focus right now it to try and get a degree in computer programming. I hope to be able to find a job as a programmer for a huge gaming company ( I know I’m a real geek.
but what can I say, i gotta find a job that I will be able to do once I lose muscles in my arms.) and buy a house in my home state.So that’s basically my education life with a little bit of some personal stuff. But the reason I am here is most likely the same reason those of you reading are here. I am a very lonely person. Unfortunately since the beginning of last year any social life I once had has gone down the toilet. I have 1 friend who comes over to my house and we hang out for a little bit to play games and have a good laugh. Other than him I have 1 other friend who joined the army and we play Xbox together on occasion. I hardly ever leave home and when I do it’s always to either a doctor’s appointment or to school.
My relationship status is even worse off than my social life. I’ve never had a girlfriend in my entire life. And not for a lack of trying. A lot of girls I find are intimidated by me. For most they are usually afraid I’ll run them over. I don’t know that I’ve ever been noticed for me and not for my wheelchair. A lot of people don’t believe me and say that girls notice me and not just because of the chair. I find that those people are very delusional. Unless you have gone out in public and had people stare at you for uneasy amounts of time, have children ask their parents “why is that boy in a chair”, or come up to you and ask, “what’s wrong with you” . I know that they are just children and they are just curious. But after a while It begins to chips away at you, at your soul, and over time it become hard to go outside because you become so self-conscious that you’d rather stay inside locked away in your room than to go outside.
I just need a friend. I need someone who I can talk to, to let out all this emotion that’s pent up inside me. Otherwise I know that it will break me one day. So if you feel that you can talk to me, please don’t be afraid. I don’t mind if you ask me questions, trust me I doubt that there is anything that I haven’t been asked before. I can be a pretty open person. I just need someone i can be open with. anyways Thank you for reading.
