androidhippy
Active member
- Joined
- Aug 18, 2009
- Messages
- 28
- Reaction score
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Hi all. In a moment of sadness a few minutes back I googled the word loneliness, read an annoyingly clinical wikipedia entry on the definition of loneliness, followed a link to the definition of "pit of despair" which is a cuddly name for a device that apparently tortures rhesus monkeys (search wikipedia for it, it's some psychiatrist's experimental apparatus, it's pretty sick), hugged my cat apologetically for being the same species as psychiatrists, then scrolled down and found this site.
After reading a few of the posts I find myself comforted by the fact that I'm not alone, that loneliness in and of itself can be a shared experience that forms the basis of a community. You've brightened my day just a bit, thank you!
I'm posting because this seems like the kind of community I belong in. I spend most of my time alone, and most of that time I'm right where I want to be, but then there are moments where the solitude feels like a cage that I'm trapped in. I wish it never hurt at all, that I could, like the Buddha (or Kane from Kung Fu), just sit beneath my bodhi tree and be at peace. But every now and then it hurts.
For the most part people are just an irritation to me. They tend to be arrogant, selfish creatures who only get dumber in groups. When I was a kid I used to dream of being the last survivor of a nuclear holocaust. It was a dream of true freedom: all the benefits of civilization (at least the non-irradiated parts) without the people to screw it up. Oh the fun I would have jumping ferraries over things, learning to fly with abandoned jetliners, turning madison square garden into my living room, trying to prep and launch a space shuttle.
As an adult, though, the dream has become more practical: financial independence. I want the benefits of civilization without the worries. Unfortunately that's a very difficult thing to achieve, and now the housing crisis and the recession has pretty much destroyed it for me, so I'm back to just being generally unfulfilled, bitter, and every now and then lonely.
Ok, enough bitching for now, it's nice to meet you all!
After reading a few of the posts I find myself comforted by the fact that I'm not alone, that loneliness in and of itself can be a shared experience that forms the basis of a community. You've brightened my day just a bit, thank you!
I'm posting because this seems like the kind of community I belong in. I spend most of my time alone, and most of that time I'm right where I want to be, but then there are moments where the solitude feels like a cage that I'm trapped in. I wish it never hurt at all, that I could, like the Buddha (or Kane from Kung Fu), just sit beneath my bodhi tree and be at peace. But every now and then it hurts.
For the most part people are just an irritation to me. They tend to be arrogant, selfish creatures who only get dumber in groups. When I was a kid I used to dream of being the last survivor of a nuclear holocaust. It was a dream of true freedom: all the benefits of civilization (at least the non-irradiated parts) without the people to screw it up. Oh the fun I would have jumping ferraries over things, learning to fly with abandoned jetliners, turning madison square garden into my living room, trying to prep and launch a space shuttle.
As an adult, though, the dream has become more practical: financial independence. I want the benefits of civilization without the worries. Unfortunately that's a very difficult thing to achieve, and now the housing crisis and the recession has pretty much destroyed it for me, so I'm back to just being generally unfulfilled, bitter, and every now and then lonely.
Ok, enough bitching for now, it's nice to meet you all!
