tedgresham
Writer, Thinker, Trouble Maker
I've written about what I'm going to write about already, somewhere here. I forget. But today I need to vent.
I've been married for 44 years. We've been up and down but almost always got along. She's always been the star in my sky. But over a decade ago she just quit being affectionate, loving, or passionate. I do not know why. I've asked, gotten no response. When I was sick and in the hospital she was there, when I was bedridden an in a wheel chair she was there. But now that I'm doing well, loosing weight, feeling and looking much better she does very little. I don't know if she was being a responsible, "good wife" when I was sick or was there because I mattered. It's very confusing.
She says she's "too old" for passion or sex. She acts as if she's very old but she's just 60, four years younger than me. I don't think someone can be too old. I am certainly now able and wishing for some attention that I don't think I'll ever get here.
When we were younger we always planned to move to a new place, preferably New Mexico. Now she insists on staying here on this family land I detest in a town I detest with our without me. She won't even talk about it.
She won't talk about anything. She has no interest in how I feel, what bothers me, or anything I'm interested in. I've written three books and a lot of articles and stories. She's read one book.
I look for someone to talk to, maybe someone to meet, because I'm just a fly on the wall here, and a maid and janitor and cook. All I manage to talk with turn out to be catfish. Every personals, dating, nice or naughty site, paid or free, just catfish. Where are the real people?
I was sick and overweight and fighting depression with booze. After two stints in the hospital and loosing a lot of fluid weight I decided to change my life. I've now lost fifty pounds in a couple months, not to mention the twenty more of fluid the doctors got off me. I wear smaller clothes now and the ones I wore six months ago are way too big. I feel better than I have in many, many years. I look better. But all I get from her is an "Oh, nice." I don't think it's bad that I just want a woman who gives a damn, who asks about what I'm doing and is interested. Who likes affection and returns it.
I am hurt and sad that I'm stuck here. Most days I'm ok. I'm working on a new book. Some days, like today, being here just gets to me.
OK, I've vented. Not a hell of a lot I can do about it. Such is life.
I've been married for 44 years. We've been up and down but almost always got along. She's always been the star in my sky. But over a decade ago she just quit being affectionate, loving, or passionate. I do not know why. I've asked, gotten no response. When I was sick and in the hospital she was there, when I was bedridden an in a wheel chair she was there. But now that I'm doing well, loosing weight, feeling and looking much better she does very little. I don't know if she was being a responsible, "good wife" when I was sick or was there because I mattered. It's very confusing.
She says she's "too old" for passion or sex. She acts as if she's very old but she's just 60, four years younger than me. I don't think someone can be too old. I am certainly now able and wishing for some attention that I don't think I'll ever get here.
When we were younger we always planned to move to a new place, preferably New Mexico. Now she insists on staying here on this family land I detest in a town I detest with our without me. She won't even talk about it.
She won't talk about anything. She has no interest in how I feel, what bothers me, or anything I'm interested in. I've written three books and a lot of articles and stories. She's read one book.
I look for someone to talk to, maybe someone to meet, because I'm just a fly on the wall here, and a maid and janitor and cook. All I manage to talk with turn out to be catfish. Every personals, dating, nice or naughty site, paid or free, just catfish. Where are the real people?
I was sick and overweight and fighting depression with booze. After two stints in the hospital and loosing a lot of fluid weight I decided to change my life. I've now lost fifty pounds in a couple months, not to mention the twenty more of fluid the doctors got off me. I wear smaller clothes now and the ones I wore six months ago are way too big. I feel better than I have in many, many years. I look better. But all I get from her is an "Oh, nice." I don't think it's bad that I just want a woman who gives a damn, who asks about what I'm doing and is interested. Who likes affection and returns it.
I am hurt and sad that I'm stuck here. Most days I'm ok. I'm working on a new book. Some days, like today, being here just gets to me.
OK, I've vented. Not a hell of a lot I can do about it. Such is life.
