shaking off dreams

[JoeVegas]

Sometimes it's her, sometimes it's someone new. Sometimes it's sexual, but most of the time it's cute, hold you close, love you forever. Sometimes it ends happily, sometimes tragic, and sometimes it just fades into nonsense.

But always, I wake up alone. Reluctant to wake fully and face my lonely life, too afraid to return to sleep so that my subconscious can bitch slap me again.

I work hard to survive without what most people consider necessary to survive. It becomes unbearable when the reminders are self-inflicted. I just want to shake it off, but it lingers like that bad taste from smoking too much and eating too little.

O well...

Thanks for providing a place to spill this...

 

[SophiaGrace]

I'm sorry you feel lonely right now.

 

[Lilianna]

Hope you feel better soon.

 

[Okiedokes]

When I first read this, it sounded like a poem being started. Is that something you do or was that a coincidence? Just thought it sounded good.

Anyways, I hope you find what you are searching for. It sounds like you want it to start with yourself and that is definitely where it starts, within. I hope you feel better soon.

 

[JoeVegas]

Thanks everyone. Really.

I had myself a good cry, which hasn't happened for quite a long time. I feel significantly better.

...and no, I have no delusions of being a poet. I just become overly melodramatic when the infinite sadness pierces through. I just need to cram it back in and move on. Any little bit I can shed here certainly helps.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Yeah it sounded so poetic. Maybe you have it naturally in you.

I'm sorry that you're feeling that way. It's good you had a good cry. Always makes one feel better, doesn't it. Hope you will feel better soon. *hugs*