She's coming over! Help!

[Unicles]

Please...do not go with Socrates or Mary's advice. Go with nerdy's.

+1

Also, in my experience, if you deny a girl just a little, it can make her want you more because you're able to control yourself and not all "gaga slobbering wide-eyed male" all over her.

So she then texted to me that we will make out the next time we meet if I want it or not

I think ThePsychologist is doing just fine.

 

[Mary Mary]

Please...do not go with Socrates or Mary's advice. Go with nerdy's.

+1

Also, in my experience, if you deny a girl just a little, it can make her want you more because you're able to control yourself and not all "gaga slobbering wide-eyed male" all over her.

So she then texted to me that we will make out the next time we meet if I want it or not

I think ThePsychologist is doing just fine.

'A little' is the operative word because this woman already gave signals.

Also, how a guy holds back makes a difference. It's one thing if he's flirting with you and being suggestive; and then when you think he's about make out with you, he pulls back as if to say 'psyche! not tonight'

That can actually be very tantalizing, as you say.

However, when you're throwing sexual signals to a guy, and he acts like he's oblivious, that doesn't have the same effect.

 

[Brian]

Psychologist. For the love of all that is holy. Don't blow this.

You have one more chance. SHE WANTS YOU. SHE WANTS YOU INSIDE HER. She just hasn't said it in so many words. You had the stage set but you missed the script. Fine. Rehearsal. But this next time, you've gotta perform.

I used to worry about 'forcing myself on women' too. I'm still afraid of being forward about some things because I'm super paranoid about criminal charges. But these are silly things to be scared of. When a girl digs a guy like she's digging you, she wants to ****, and there's nothing wrong about that or anything to feel ashamed about initiating; it's human and it's beautiful. We've been ******* for thousands of years before fashion, cell phones, and hard alcohol were invented...all the original schematics are still used, there's just some optional modules installed.

Make this happen. Show her the night of her life. You're obviously intelligent. Most women who date around aren't used to a genuinely smart guy. If you can add confidence and the ability to facilitate her needs to the rest of your resume, you're going to eventually blow her mind and you won't be able to pry her off. That's right: Guys like us are like secret weapons. If you unlock your actual potential...all the dimwitted knuckledraggers competing for her attention? Suddenly inferior to you. Because they're sexy, confident, and ultimately dull, with no real light at the end of their tunnels. You are sexy, confident, and engaging, and are going places. You're the guy, behind the guy, BEHIND the guy.

In the Poetic Edda, specifically in Rigsthula (The Lay of Rig), it is said that at the dawn of Man, four sorts of humans were born: the Thrall, capable of little more than sweeping the floor and fertilizing the field; the Churl (or Karl, or Freedman), clean but basic, taking up the noble but laborious tasks of Life; the Earl (or Thane), living more comfortably, studying and practicing more refined arts; and Kings...self explanatory.

What are the people around you in this scheme? What are -you-, and is it all you can be?

I'm honest, I would call myself a Freedman; and it is not a bad lot in life, for even the Freedman holds power over the Thrall. But I feel I certainly have the potential to become a Thane, with time, as do you. A lot of the young guys on the dating scene who I see get a lot of dates and sex are little more than Thralls and will never -be- more. The only reason they are successful and we have not been is because we haven't been asserting ourselves in the past. I have to give Socrates props in this regard.


My current girlfriend could get any guy she wants and she's been with quite a few. She's with me because I'm smart and can carry a conversation, because I communicate well and easily and because I'm spontaneous too. But she would never have said a word if I hadn't initiated things and put events in to motion. Put those events in to motion and let the magic happen. You have it in you, don't let a few past years of oppression seal it up.

 

[ThePsychologist]

Absolute great advice Brian! I will defenitly make good use of it!

Friday she is coming over again and I told her to bring her toothbrush and pyjama's, to which she agreed. So things will be good

Will prepare myself internally for this.

I don't think she is gonna run over to the "next guy" because I "blew her off" last time. There is no next guy for her. I can tell She really is attracted to what I can offer her, and that will turn the attraction into overdrive once we will feel free to be intimate with each other whenever we want. Things will be amazing once we crossed that barrier. And that will happen on friday.

So friday will be the day this relationship got real. I'm happy!

 

[Mr. Sir]

Well guys, if you want to laugh at me, I failed in a similar way to the OP last night, with a 10/10 girl. I will post the whole story later.

 

[ThePsychologist]

Well guys, if you want to laugh at me, I failed in a similar way to the OP last night, with a 10/10 girl. I will post the whole story later.

We cannot fail if we learn from our mistakes.

I know I did.

Looking forward to the story

 

[NOAH_FX]

No one want's to laugh at you Socrates.

 

[nerdygirl]

Please...do not go with Socrates or Mary's advice. Go with nerdy's.

Nerdy girl had originally suggested that this date would be a good time to make out.

Nerdygirl originally suggested that he shouldn't make assumptions, that he should make it easy for things to progress, but that he also shouldn't treat her like she's only there for his sexual pleasure. Please do not misquote me. Thank you.

 

[Mary Mary]

Please...do not go with Socrates or Mary's advice. Go with nerdy's.

Nerdy girl had originally suggested that this date would be a good time to make out.

Nerdygirl originally suggested that he shouldn't make assumptions, that he should make it easy for things to progress, but that he also shouldn't treat her like she's only there for his sexual pleasure. Please do not misquote me. Thank you.

Relax before you make yourself sick! If you're spending all of your time stressing out, she's probably picking up on your anxiety. That's going to increase her own tension. You said she likes you. Give yourself some credit, allow yourself a little confidence!

If all you've had was one brief kiss, though, I'd be surprised if she wants to have sex with you on your next date. (It might be a good time for making out, though!) Figure out something to do before and/or after dinner, or things might be very awkward! It should be something simple but entertaining, and still at home. Like, if you go out to see a movie, you wouldn't have the same opportunity for intimacy that you would have if you snuggled together on the sofa and watched a DVD.

I thought it was you who said that.

 

[nerdygirl]

Congratulations, Mary Mary. You've successfully taken a sentence out of context.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Don't start fighting. Keep the topic at hand on mind, and if you disagree with someone, ignore their posts.

 

[Mary Mary]

Absolute great advice Brian! I will defenitly make good use of it!

Friday she is coming over again and I told her to bring her toothbrush and pyjama's, to which she agreed. So things will be good

Will prepare myself internally for this.

I don't think she is gonna run over to the "next guy" because I "blew her off" last time. There is no next guy for her. I can tell She really is attracted to what I can offer her, and that will turn the attraction into overdrive once we will feel free to be intimate with each other whenever we want. Things will be amazing once we crossed that barrier. And that will happen on friday.

So friday will be the day this relationship got real. I'm happy!

I'm so happy for you.

However, with great trepidation in contradicting the men on this board, I'm of the camp that you don't actually need to have sex with her. She just needs to feel that you want her sexually, and having an intellectual reason to wait for sex like being religious or waiting for the right time won't lessen her interest.

I think the sleep over is a great idea, and you should do it; but I don't think you should feel pressured to actually have sex with her. It should be a sensuous evening, but I think if you decide to make her wait, in this case Unicles will be right. It will intensify her anticipation.

 

[ThePsychologist]

I'm so happy for you.

However, with great trepidation in contradicting the men on this board, I'm of the camp that you don't actually need to have sex with her. She just needs to feel that you want her sexually, and having an intellectual reason to wait for sex like being religious or waiting for the right time won't lessen her interest.

I think the sleep over is a great idea, and you should do it; but I don't think you should feel pressured to actually have sex with her. It should be a sensuous evening, but I think if you decide to make her wait, in this case Unicles will be right. It will intensify her anticipation.

You are absolutely right. And I've given her hints that I want her sexually, we do that in text messages a lot recently. I've told her I thought she looked sexy that day or that I want her to which she replies the same way back. We both know we want it.

I'm not gonna feel the pressure of having sex with her. I've made that very clear with myself. What I did made my self clear is that I will make out with her, and start slowly. 1 step forward, 2 steps back, building anticipation and try to go a step forward everytime. If she say's stop, then that does not mean she does not want me all togehter, it will just mean "not just yet, I need to feel more attraction".
I think this is very hard for me to do considering I don't have much experience, but somehow I think my instincts will take over and things will be okay once I'm not so much active in my head. That last one is really important for me.

So if I make out with her but don't have sex yet, that will make her come back the next day. But if we have sex and if it is good sex, the same result will probably happen, so it better be good sex

I've read a lot about how to go on about this (David D Angelo) and feeling more confident everyday.

 

[Mary Mary]

I'm so happy for you. Brian's right. You're a great guy. She'll be pleased.

 

[Mr. Sir]

I've read a lot about how to go on about this (David D Angelo) and feeling more confident everyday.

^ Good to hear your reading Seduction Artist books. I agree with like 85% of what those guys say, but the one thing that irks me is how they refuse to acknowledge the role that LOOKS play in the dating game, or try and claim that some milktoast doofus can start acting "Alpha" and succeed.

 

[Mary Mary]

Oh, I remember David Deangelo. The cocky but funny guy. I thought that was Doc Love. Whatever.

They do seem to focus just on behavior when there are other attributes like physical traits, social status, and money. It's probably just an easier sell to focus on behavior.

 

[ThePsychologist]

What kind of seduction artist would you guys recommend looking into regarding these traits? Or which one worked best for you?

 

[Brian]

The only one I've liked so far is whats-his-name with the Pandora system. Look for a torrent, don't pay for the crap.

 

[Mr. Sir]

What kind of seduction artist would you guys recommend looking into regarding these traits? Or which one worked best for you?

PUA only works for dudes who have the looks and muscles to back it up. I would pursue at least 6 months of weight-training before ANY of this PUA stuff is gonna work.

But because you already have the girl, I think it will work for you. Dunno. Just google stuff.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

PUA..crap actually works...

Becuase some of the **** the guys writes about was stuff I was doing already...jsust didnt know it was an art.and people actaully pay for that ****...then it was kind of news to me
to read about dudes in their 30s and had nevered kissed a girl before.


In general...you gatta have balls to aske women out...**** loads of women..You gatta let rejections roll off of ya. And u bascially just have the attitude of going fishing...Shes not the bgi of a deal know amtter how beautiful sweet and kind she is...when your going shoping Some women arnt going to like it...but fuick her..shes not that big of a deal.lol

Romance and forming a healthy relationship with a woman...
When you get a woman you want..resech on these subjects.