Taking a Break from ***

[Daicovski]

Okay, that should be a sufficiently catchy title.
Anyway. I'm in a relationship with this really cute girl, I really like her. We've been going out for more than half a year now, and she's my first ever proper girlfriend. We're both 22 years old.
The problem is; she's been depressed for maybe 9 years now, and it doesn't get any better. For the last two months or so, she's been more depressed than she uses to be and she's done some bad things to herself.

A couple of days ago, she told me she didn't have the lust for *** anymore; that she does it only to make me happy and that she wants it to be over with as soon as possible. This is really depressing, so I proposed to take a break until she feels the lust again. This, of course, makes her even more depressed because she feels like a "bad girlfriend" and that I'll become sexually frustrated. I hope it wasn't a bad decision, but she said that she had come to the same conclusion; to take a break.

That's it. I just wish she could get well, but it seems 100% impossible. Hopefully she could get a little bit better–to the previous level so to speak. To get the lust back. She hardly wants to do anything.
All this makes me doubt whether she actually likes me, deep down. She's so afraid of losing me.

I should probably have a question here or something. If there's anyone out there that can cure depressions on a whim, please step forward, will you?

-- Dai

 

[Nina]

Sadly, there is no "whim cure" for depression. All I can suggest, is for her to seek some treatment. I know a lot of folks frown on meds but 9 years is a long time depression for a 22 year old. It might be a viable solution to some of her issues.

 

[Daicovski]

Sadly, there is no "whim cure" for depression. All I can suggest, is for her to seek some treatment. I know a lot of folks frown on meds but 9 years is a long time depression for a 22 year old. It might be a viable solution to some of her issues.

Thanks for your reply!
I probably omitted the biggest problem. She's been on meds for maybe 7 years. She's got a keeper whom she sees weekly. She's got a doctor. It doesn't help.

 

[eris]

I think youre a very good person to understand her situation. This cannot be easy for both of you. But cant she, uh, do things for you ? You know what I mean. I think just because she doesnt want to have *** doesnt mean you should quit everything... but if depression is really taking over her life completely the current psychiatrist isnt doing a very good job. If it has been this many years and there is no improvement you need a new plan. If things are getting WORSE and there is no new plan, get a new doctor.

Maybe the meds cause loss of *** drive. I know I took something called Celexa, and it killed my *** drive. I refused to take it and they put me on Wellbuterin SR, instead. Wellbuterin SR is the antidepressent that is suppoed to restore a lost *** drive that was lost due to medication It might be a good idea to see a second psychiatrist to get a second opinion on her medication. It obviously isnt working too well for her depression, either, and a medication adjustment may do a lot of good.

 

[Nina]

I agree with eris, a new doc is needed... Maybe even a full new evaluation and diagnosis. There are treatments out there. They may never cure the condition but it may treat and improve it to some extent. I do wish you luck with this.

 

[Daicovski]

I think youre a very good person to understand her situation. This cannot be easy for both of you. But cant she, uh, do things for you ? You know what I mean. I think just because she doesnt want to have *** doesnt mean you should quit everything... but if depression is really taking over her life completely the current psychiatrist isnt doing a very good job. If it has been this many years and there is no improvement you need a new plan. If things are getting WORSE and there is no new plan, get a new doctor.

Maybe the meds cause loss of *** drive. I know I took something called Celexa, and it killed my *** drive. I refused to take it and they put me on Wellbuterin SR, instead. Wellbuterin SR is the antidepressent that is suppoed to restore a lost *** drive that was lost due to medication It might be a good idea to see a second psychiatrist to get a second opinion on her medication. It obviously isnt working too well for her depression, either, and a medication adjustment may do a lot of good.

Thanks
I think I get what you mean, but I don't think it would be such a good idea :/ Without the lust she probably doesn't feel like receiving, and I don't want her to just give all the time. She's afraid of using people, and thus hardly (if ever) puts herself first.
But maybe we could do something, to not lose the intimacy.

Also, about the medications. She objects to taking most meds because they cause weight gain.

I agree with eris, a new doc is needed... Maybe even a full new evaluation and diagnosis. There are treatments out there. They may never cure the condition but it may treat and improve it to some extent. I do wish you luck with this.

Yeah, probably. She's been diagnosed with asperger's, which I think is bollocks. But I'm no specialist.
She's had maybe 15 doctors or something during her depression. Apparently they were all bad, just giving her pills. :/ When they talk, she doesn't remember much from the session. The doctor she has now is supposed to be the best in the area (in public health care), but he doesn't seems to care.