L
Living_in_solitude
Guest
How many of you found him/herself constantly living in a bubble? The bubble of dreams!
This bubble is one of the main reasons why I am living in solitude. I can’t seem to get away from it or to burst it so I can join the society wagon. How many of you found himself/herself in a social gathering where everybody is laughing and conversing except for you being silent looking at the horizon thinking about happiness? Every event I participate in I find myself doing this. I start off good, trying to engage in the conversations not because I was enjoying it. But because I wanted to practice my social skills by not letting myself slip back into the distant dreams. Halas, this effort only lasts for about half an hour, and then I find myself living in my bubble again.
This bubble can be embarrassing sometimes. I remember when I was in a relationship. It was one of my girlfriends friends birthday and we were invited to go to a restaurant to celebrate. As I was trying to find a parking spot and I realized that it was nearly impossible to find right at the heart of social interaction, Downtown. So I dropped off my girlfriend in front of the restaurant so that she could join the rest and I went about my way looking for the parking spot. Finally after about 30 minutes I found one. So I park my car and I start walking towards the restaurant. I remember walking for about 10 to 15 minutes, going around bocks, when I finally got to the restaurant. Everybody was relieved that I got there. I mean after about 45 minutes people will get worried. So I joined my girlfriend. That evening I kept quiet as usual while everybody else was laughing and having fun.
After the evening my girlfriend and I went walking back to the car. So we started walking and walking and walking only I could find my car. Or at least I could not remember where I parked it. My girlfriend got so upset with me for not being able to remember. Finally I found the car and let me tell you that I was upset with myself more than my girlfriend was with me. All of a sudden I look behind me right about 20 yards to my right across the street and I find out that the very same restaurant where we had dinner was there!
If you only knew how I wished that I had dropped dead right on the spot for being so embarrassed.
Then I figured out what was this bubble of mine. Simply put, the real world is not stimulating my emotions anymore. That is why I am constantly living in a world of fiction and dreams because this is about the only thing that is making me feel alive! How ironic, instead of taking advantage of the social opportunities to feel alive, I choose to live in my bubble!
This bubble is one of the main reasons why I am living in solitude. I can’t seem to get away from it or to burst it so I can join the society wagon. How many of you found himself/herself in a social gathering where everybody is laughing and conversing except for you being silent looking at the horizon thinking about happiness? Every event I participate in I find myself doing this. I start off good, trying to engage in the conversations not because I was enjoying it. But because I wanted to practice my social skills by not letting myself slip back into the distant dreams. Halas, this effort only lasts for about half an hour, and then I find myself living in my bubble again.
This bubble can be embarrassing sometimes. I remember when I was in a relationship. It was one of my girlfriends friends birthday and we were invited to go to a restaurant to celebrate. As I was trying to find a parking spot and I realized that it was nearly impossible to find right at the heart of social interaction, Downtown. So I dropped off my girlfriend in front of the restaurant so that she could join the rest and I went about my way looking for the parking spot. Finally after about 30 minutes I found one. So I park my car and I start walking towards the restaurant. I remember walking for about 10 to 15 minutes, going around bocks, when I finally got to the restaurant. Everybody was relieved that I got there. I mean after about 45 minutes people will get worried. So I joined my girlfriend. That evening I kept quiet as usual while everybody else was laughing and having fun.
After the evening my girlfriend and I went walking back to the car. So we started walking and walking and walking only I could find my car. Or at least I could not remember where I parked it. My girlfriend got so upset with me for not being able to remember. Finally I found the car and let me tell you that I was upset with myself more than my girlfriend was with me. All of a sudden I look behind me right about 20 yards to my right across the street and I find out that the very same restaurant where we had dinner was there!
If you only knew how I wished that I had dropped dead right on the spot for being so embarrassed.
Then I figured out what was this bubble of mine. Simply put, the real world is not stimulating my emotions anymore. That is why I am constantly living in a world of fiction and dreams because this is about the only thing that is making me feel alive! How ironic, instead of taking advantage of the social opportunities to feel alive, I choose to live in my bubble!