The world has killed me....

[Krossknife]

I just cannot seem to get things going on the right track, I have been over working, under sleeping, and doing newthings to make a part inside of me feel alive again, And yet it seems as if the world buried me years ago.....My existence at least from my perspective is very non as it is. Anyone have any suggestions to help me feel alive again i mean to be more specific, I go to work wondering why and see no point in it, I talk to ppl and wonder why im startinbg to feel no compassion for them or any connections for that fact, I go to bed and feel like I have been up to late and yet I have no reason to sleep I just do for the habit of it. Lately I have not looked forward to ANYTHING!, no matter what it is and the sad part is yesterday at work i was ut in my thigh by my workmate on the forklift and for a brief second I felt alive! I mean the pain i did not like but the feeling along with it if only for a brief moment made me feel awake from this nightmare we call life. Do not get me wrong I do not wish to die or kill myself I just need to revitalize my soul.....Sorry if this makes no sense I do not know how to explain it

 

[teach]

Hi Krossknife,

If you can stand children, I'd suggest volunteering at either a Big Brothers/Big Sisters program or being a mentor at a local school (you can pick the grade level). As a mentor, this person goes in once a week, for about an hour, spending time with a particular kid who needs someone just to listen (not too deep of advice), be the "adult" they don't see when they get home, sometimes help with their classwork. The kids we have with mentors usually keep a decent attendance, even if their grades aren't the best, but get to passing.

Now, if you don't like kids, there's always a nursing home, spend time talking (older people need to tell their stories, which can be really, really interesting). And finally (I'm sure there's more, but all I can think of at the moment.) there is volunteering at a Humane Society. Many of these options also lend itself to meeting other adults and building bonds that way.

 

[lonelygirl]

Reminds me of that new song by Morrissey, 'You Have Killed Me.'



Keep fighting the good fight!

 

[Krossknife]

Sorry couldn't get on for a few days am working 7 days a week and overtime atm uug....Teach thks for the suggestions, but I dont think that is what i need In my life I have always had to search feverishly for anything, anyone, and my desires or interests in general and it is really wearing me down. But I have an idea and it may backfire on me but I figure if I can quit smoking that would be one huge accomplishment, and then just maybe with a little confidence under my belt? I can make another step.

 

[Krossknife]

yeah it does lonelygirl lol, and good to see ya again i havent been on 5that much lateley or rather havent been posting. I always read the forums when i can. But hard for me to give advise even when i want to when i cannot follow my own lol

 

[teach]

Hi Krossknife,

Those suggestions aren't for everyone; I can't even step foot into an elementary school without shuddering. Those people are amazing. Giving up smoking..that's impressive, real personal growth. Good luck with it!!!

 

[lonelygirl]

Just keep your chin up, and NEVER let the bastards grind you down!

 

[Guest]

Quitting smoking would certainly help you out.
I know the many times I've quit I always had more energy and vitality...
food tastes better and I eat nonstop cause everything tastes so much better than it did when I was smoking.
I'm a pack-a-day man myself but I plan on quitting again soon.
Makes me feel better about everything in general when I do.
Good Luck!

 

[Guest]

Holidays!!, go somewhere you've never been in... have fun, buy things, visit places.
I'm feeling something similar, and in my case is caused by routine. It kills people you know