Ok, I just joined this site. My name's Ash, I'm 31, female, and this is my story. I have always been so alone. I don't think anyone could possibly understand just how lonely my life has been. I have never had anyone. I wasn't loved as a kid and growing up, and that had always left me feeling completely alone and alien to the world. I mean, even as a little kid, being unloved by my family, I felt no attachment to other people at all. To really get you to understand what I mean, I've always hoped that there won't be an afterlife, because I have no family waiting for me on the other side, and I fear being completely alone and aware of that fact for all eternity. I'm all alone in my life and the afterlife, if there is one. My family consists of only 2 people who don't love me. I've never had people around me. I grew up without friends, too. And I've lived a life of loneliness because I'm too ugly to have ever had a man in my life. So, while everyone else gets to have parents that love them, friends that really care about them, and someone special who loves them, I have not had any of that. I've always been 100%, completely alone in this world. Well, I'm seriously considering killing myself. I recently met someone, the first person I've ever felt a connection with, someone who I feel like is my soul mate. But I can't be with him. It's extremely highly unlikely I could even become his friend. (he's famous.) And now, I just miss him so much and feel so alone in the world again. I can't see living the rest of my life as completely alone as I've always been. I don't think anyone can understand just how much it hurts to live my life of complete loneliness. :'(
Very tired of the loneliness
- Thread starter lonelyash
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Unacceptance
Well-known member
Who took care of you growing up?
ledchick
Well-known member
Ash,
I was surrounded by people that were suppose to love me and didnt , they were too busy loving themselves. I felt alone and rejected all of my life and still do. I have taken the suicide route and it is just not worth it. I have to look for what I need inside myself not from others. Even when I thought others ''loved' me, it was just a crutch to keep myself from depending on, well myself. I have no one, even though I am surrounded by people, I am still alone. I feel your pain and the pain of the loneliness, I spend so much time alone or if I am around others they just use me and then discard me when they are done with me, I am much better off alone. There is someone for everyone even in the sea of loneliness. It is just a big sea.
I was surrounded by people that were suppose to love me and didnt , they were too busy loving themselves. I felt alone and rejected all of my life and still do. I have taken the suicide route and it is just not worth it. I have to look for what I need inside myself not from others. Even when I thought others ''loved' me, it was just a crutch to keep myself from depending on, well myself. I have no one, even though I am surrounded by people, I am still alone. I feel your pain and the pain of the loneliness, I spend so much time alone or if I am around others they just use me and then discard me when they are done with me, I am much better off alone. There is someone for everyone even in the sea of loneliness. It is just a big sea.
Pasha Selim
Well-known member
I am very lonely and very depressed, 37 yo. If you want we can write each other by e-mail.
