What do you notice about popular people..

[EmilyFoxSeaton]

Been thinking about it lately and trying to put together a profile of people that are well liked... this is what I came up with.

1. good looking. Not always but if you can be good looking this really helps. I would break this category down into a few things.. well dressed.. clean cut... clothing that comes from name brands.  Not necessarily intrinsically attractive. 

2. No strong opinions about anything. My boss is well liked because he never actually has a strong thought about anything. Unfortunately for him he is in a position how where he has to take a stand. Unfortunately for us he never takes one and will do anything to avoid taking a stand.

3. No knowledge about anything. They suck up information that others provide them but never have any information to give to others. That doesn't mean they aren't smart, but they never provide information. They are always fascinated by anything you say as if they didn't know it and you are the most interesting person in the world.  As if they are dependent on you. 

4. NEVER do anything in a contrary manner than what everyone else does. You go along to get along. No mind of your own. 

5. Always go to events and parties... even if you just stay for a second. 

6. Never feel used even if people use you. That is just expected. 

7. Be vunerable. Heart on your sleeve all the time. It kind of implies a trust that makes people want to take care of you.

Whatchat think?

 

[Sci-Fi]

Uuuhhhh...meh yeah some of it. I guess it all depends on where you are basing your term of popularity from. I've seen people who were "popular" that it just boggled my mind as to why. The whole "popularity" thing is just a status we like to toss on things, whether it should or shouldn't have it.

 

[ardour]

Except for good looking, pretty much the opposite. Opinionated, ambitious, aggressive, highly social and cliquish. People with more passive personalities generally want the approval of those who are more dominant, that's why they're popular.

Sounds like you just resent a few people.

 

[EmilyFoxSeaton]

Except for good looking, pretty much the opposite. Opinionated, ambitious, aggressive, highly social and cliquish. People with more passive personalities generally want the approval of those who are more dominant,  that's why they're popular.

Sounds like you just resent a few people.

No it sounds like you do.

 

[M_also_lonely]

I can't say about the 1st one since I haven't met many popular people. But for the rest,
2nd Look at Milo Yiannopolous
3rd Look at Ben Shapiro
4th Look at Elon Musk
5th Look at Shia LaBeouf
6th Look at Hillary Clinton
7th Look at Donald Trump

 

[kamya]

The first thing that came to mind before even clicking on the thread was "No strong opinions about anything". Not that they don't have strong opinions, they just don't let their opinions be known. I also agree a bit on the "go along to get along" a little bit. They are very rarely the type to rock the boat.

A more positive trait I've noticed about my more popular friends is that, when talking or hanging out one-on-one,  they have the ability to make it seem like you are really important to them. They give you their full attention and are always positive and supportive. Very little negativity. Nothing repels other people faster than being negative. Even if they might have 100 other friends and you only see them once or twice a year, when you do get the chance to hang out you are their whole focus. They are actually curious about getting to know others and genuinely care for their well being. Their actions make people really feel it too.

Then of course there are some people that are ONLY popular because of the genetics gods blessing them with amazing looks, but no one actually likes those people really. =P It's all superficial unless the person actually has other good traits to go along with their looks. Sure they might get more attention but there is a trend of attractive people complaining about not being taken seriously. Bimbo/Slut/Fuckboy labels and all that. I don't think that kind of attention really equates to popularity as much as people think.

 

[DarkSelene]

Extroversion, agreeableness, openness...

I don't think these traits have innate bad connotations at all, if it's the case that's being made in this thread (which I don't know if it is), but they can turn into something bad if you don't focus on developing well - that can be said about any personality trait, imo.
Also don't think good looks really fit here, sure they're more well accepted generally, but you have to give people something else to be popular among them... if it's just good looks they'll probably not like you very much (see Kamya's post).

 

[ardour]

The first thing that came to mind before even clicking on the thread was "No strong opinions about anything". Not that they don't have strong opinions, they just don't let their opinions be known. I also agree a bit on the "go along to get along" a little bit. They are very rarely the type to rock the boat.

Maybe this is more relevant to young adults, but that seems like it's about appearing 'too cool' to express a sincere opinion about anything, since that would be like breaking frame and showing a kind of vulnerability. Some people even at my age are still like this.

 

[user 139760]

I agree.
But then you have to ask yourself, are the popular people really the ones you want around you all the time?

I tend to shy away from the popular ones. They're usually just pretending at what you've listed. The kind of people that exhude that at work, then they go home to their wife or husbands and ***** about work all night.
I'd rather people with stronger opinions that stand by them, or someone who I'm telling something too that looks at me and goes "I don't really care...honestly, neither should you" or some such. Popular tend to be so because they're good at pretending. I don't remember where I saw this, but I'd rather be hated for something I am rather than be loved for something i'm not, no matter the advantages I get from it.

 

[9006]

People are popular for all kinds of reasons. But I think people with strong personalities, who are humorous, or generally compatible people are the most popular.

 

[TheRealCallie]

People are popular for all kinds of reasons. But I think people with strong personalities, who are humorous, or generally compatible people are the most popular.

This...also CONFIDENCE.

Yes, there are good looking people in "popular" groups, as well as shallow people, people who don't care, people who are dumb, people who are sheep, people who go to all the parties, etc etc etc.
But guess what? Those people also exist in "UNpopular" groups.

I don't really think the OP knows much about popular people though. It does seem like it's stemming from stereotypical bitterness.

 

[EmilyFoxSeaton]

A more positive trait I've noticed about my more popular friends is that, when talking or hanging out one-on-one,  they have the ability to make it seem like you are really important to them. They give you their full attention and are always positive and supportive. Very little negativity. Nothing repels other people faster than being negative. 

Yes, I have definitely noticed this. It is a trait I look for myself and sometimes give. 

You guys are a jaded bunch. I am not posting in bitterness just trying to figure out for myself what are traits i should adopt or try to have. I realize I have gotten too independent with a "I don't need you" attitude and now I am trying to change things up a little.

 

[Stylus]

We all have a need to get along on a certain level and being socially adept and perceptive enough to be generally accepted or liked by the majority of people you meet is a definite life skill. I'd expect even the most socially adept however would not confuse superficial social recognition as being in anyway a replacement for a meaningful, close and lasting relationships.. ie one that's not based on a 7 point tick list. You tend to find the smartest most down to earth celebrities for example rely heavily on their close childhood friends to keep them level headed and not let public adoration turn them into an idiot.

I think if you try to be a certain type of person to cultivate being popular though you're going to be on shaky ground, just be yourself and be nice to people, it will take care of itself!

 

[user 139760]

Yes, I have definitely noticed this. It is a trait I look for myself and sometimes give. 

You guys are a jaded bunch. I am not posting in bitterness just trying to figure out for myself what are traits i should adopt or try to have. I realize I have gotten too independent with a "I don't need you" attitude and now I am trying to change things up a little.

Ha, I just noticed this.
Personally, and I'm probably one of the few who are like that, this is a trait I HATE. Seriously hate with a furious passion. Ironically, I need to use it sometimes within the context of my functions.
They SEEM like they care. Usually, it's pretty obvious they don't. Not really.
I'm a simple guy. I appreciate honesty. That goes for respect, or for outright hatred. A man or woman who pretends to like me but bitches me nonstop (we have a plethora of those in offices, all smiles and sunshine until the deck is dropped when your realize what calleous *ssholes or b*tches they actually are) is NOT someone I'll feel worthy gravitating towards.
It's all show and no substance, 90% of the time. I hate the hypocrisy of it. Which is why I tend to gyrate towards the outcasts. The "problem" people. They are usually much more insightful and honest with their stances.

Personal observation only. There is a margin between total detachement and simulated empathy.

 

[Jessicat]

Except for good looking, pretty much the opposite. Opinionated, ambitious, aggressive, highly social and cliquish. People with more passive personalities generally want the approval of those who are more dominant,  that's why they're popular.

Sounds like you just resent a few people.

You are so right. I am glad i don’t feel the need to be in either categories. 
Cheers to you.