Ok, it didn't really go as I wanted. Once I was driving to the city centre I was really calm. I waited for a while for her to show up, she was 5 minutes late because she came from her work. The minute I saw her I thought "what the hell am I doing?". It's really hard to explain but I realised that it might be a terrible idea to tell her that I like her, because I didn't feel anything at that moment. Usually when I see her or speak to her I'm very excited but this time I felt nothing. I didn't see her as a potential partner. She said she was hungry so we went to another café because they only sold coffee, tea and things like pie at the one we were supposed to go (plus, there was no empty table left). I bought her a sandwich and a drink and I bought a drink, a sandwich and a muffin (she wanted me to share the muffin with her).
When we were eating/drinking she was telling me about some stuff I don't really remember because I was thinking about what to do. I really didn't (and still don't) know what the hell happened. I still thought/think she looks good and she's nice, but I didn't feel the urge to let her know I like her anymore. I was pretty satisfied with my situation. She noticed I wasn't really paying attention to her so I decided to think about this later. When we were finished I said I needed new gloves (because I needed new gloves
), she wanted to come with me so we went to a big department store to buy gloves. She had bought some nice cheap gloves there so she said I should go there. We've been in that store for a while because she wanted to show me some stuff, shoes, parfume. Eventually I found nice gloves and I payed and we left. By this time I already decided that I wasn't going to tell her that I like her because to be honest I'm not sure I even do. We talked for a while and she mentioned that in another department store (the HEMA) you can have breakfast for 1 euro, she said she wanted to try that sometime. She said she didn't have any classes on tuesday morning and asked me if I had time on tuesday morning. I have time on tuesday morning, so I said yes. She asked if I wanted to have breakfast there sometime, I said yes. After this we walked back to our bicycles, she gave me a hug and I went home. Now I'm here.
I still don't really understand what happened to me. I think I'm just satisfied with being friends. Maybe this is some weird thing my brain does to protect myself from having a broken heart, I just don't know. I had a good time and she showed interest in me but it left me cold... This is probably ony of the weirdest experiences I've ever had. I don't know what happened to me and I don't know what to do, but as long as I think it's better to just be friends I think I'm OK.
