Thank you for the response. It was my presumption that we all had things in common.
Single, tired of cooking for one, tired of risking time and money on tempting recipes that turned out not so great.
Certainly the initial replies were enthusiastic. Everyone was sick of paying a fortune to eat in restaurants or else have to do all the work themselves.
I'm really not aware of any epidemic of rape, murder and kidnapping of women, but it's been my perception that many/most women live in a state of constant fear and apprehension of strangers.
I have a female friend who lives in a rural area. She is religious and conservative, and I am not. She is twice divorced, and single, and has often requested that I attend events such as a class reunion or a wedding, as her escort.
I really don't get it. If a woman shows up to an event alone, what precise negative thing happens? Do the other women attack her with knives and try to kill her?
Once my friend visited me in the city, parked next to my building on the street, and was walking it. It was maybe 7 PM. I got a panicked call....."There's a MAN walking behind me!"
Uh, yeah. It's a sidewalk, it's a city full of people. Some of them are men. So what?
From then on, I came down and walked her in, but my point is this. I looked at a crime map of my neighborhood, and compared it to her rural area. More violent crime there than in my home.
Many years ago, I discovered something new. Evidently, young people say "yes" to every invitation, then on the night in question, decide which commitment to keep, what event to attend. They don't call, they don't feel any shame or responsibility.
I suppose this could be laid at the feet of the generation that enacted downsizing and displayed constant betrayal. All parents get divorced, all jobs will eventually fire you, everyone cheats sexually, all polititians do nothing but lie cheat and steal, you have to grab what you can get now, because nothing lasts.
My ex girlfriend has vehemently stated that my idea was idiotic, that no sane woman would ever attend a party full of total strangers......really? You're that much a child? You have to have your hand held through your entire life?
I'm an ectomorph. what many would call a wimp. My ex girlfriend could kick my ass, easily. Yet I am a potential abuser, rapist and murderer, simply because I have a penis.
She is a perpetual victim, simply because she has a vagina.
Thank you for the response. It was my presumption that we all had things in common.
Single, tired of cooking for one, tired of risking time and money on tempting recipes that turned out not so great.
Certainly the initial replies were enthusiastic. Everyone was sick of paying a fortune to eat in restaurants or else have to do all the work themselves.
I'm really not aware of any epidemic of rape, murder and kidnapping of women, but it's been my perception that many/most women live in a state of constant fear and apprehension of strangers.
I have a female friend who lives in a rural area. She is religious and conservative, and I am not. She is twice divorced, and single, and has often requested that I attend events such as a class reunion or a wedding, as her escort.
I really don't get it. If a woman shows up to an event alone, what precise negative thing happens? Do the other women attack her with knives and try to kill her?
Once my friend visited me in the city, parked next to my building on the street, and was walking it. It was maybe 7 PM. I got a panicked call....."There's a MAN walking behind me!"
Uh, yeah. It's a sidewalk, it's a city full of people. Some of them are men. So what?
From then on, I came down and walked her in, but my point is this. I looked at a crime map of my neighborhood, and compared it to her rural area. More violent crime there than in my home.
Many years ago, I discovered something new. Evidently, young people say "yes" to every invitation, then on the night in question, decide which commitment to keep, what event to attend. They don't call, they don't feel any shame or responsibility.
I suppose this could be laid at the feet of the generation that enacted downsizing and displayed constant betrayal. All parents get divorced, all jobs will eventually fire you, everyone cheats sexually, all polititians do nothing but lie cheat and steal, you have to grab what you can get now, because nothing lasts.
My ex girlfriend has vehemently stated that my idea was idiotic, that no sane woman would ever attend a party full of total strangers......really? You're that much a child? You have to have your hand held through your entire life?
I'm an ectomorph. what many would call a wimp. My ex girlfriend could kick my ass, easily. Yet I am a potential abuser, rapist and murderer, simply because I have a penis.
She is a perpetual victim, simply because she has a vagina.
Thank you for your feedback. I am also a rape victim, molested by my sister when I was a child. Your experience illustrates something many people choose not to accept.
The persons with the greatest potential to harm us are those close to us, those whom we trust. The family priest who ends up sodomizing your altar boy son, for example. The truly evil sociopaths know how to cover up their tracks. At work. In the neighborhood. The ones that are getting away with it, day after day, right under your nose. Those should be feared, not the "obvious" threats.
I attended a casual gaming group via Meetup.com, held in a large office meeting room.
I didn't know anyone attending. The hostess got permission to use the space over the weekend while the place was empty. When I arrived, I noticed that the group quickly broke off into cliques of people who already knew each other at tables to play games. It wasn't an inviting atmosphere.
I mention this as it touches upon what I perceive as your experience with that party. There are no common standards of social behavior any more. No manners. To my way of thinking, the hostess of that group had an obligation to make certain no one was "shut out" that everyone was engaged.
At one table sat four twentysomething young ladies, glancing around nervously, with no game in front of them. I'll never know the facts, but I'm convinced my guess was accurate: They had been invited by the hostess in order to pump up her numbers and her ego. "Come, try it out, gaming is fun!" They didn't have the first clue what a Eurogame is. Their idea of a game was maybe Pictionary or Monopoly.
Fortunately, I'd brought an unconventional game with me that I consider very "light weight". Museum Caper Clue. I'm not an attractive man, but I do have a great voice, and some acting talent. I approached, and in my best "game show host" manner, proposed to teach them the game. Apprehensive but without any other alternative, they agreed.
This game puts the players into the role of detectives inside a fine art museum at night. One player takes the role of a burglar who breaks in to get the art, and the others attempt to apprehend them. The game plays briskly, and it's easy for everyone to get a turn at the
fun role of burglar. As we played, I teased and cajoled and urged on the players. Soon the girls were giggling and having a great time.
Eventually, some of the clique snobs at other tables took breaks and stood around our table, curious and eager to get in on the fun. "Where can I buy this game, " one snob asked. "You can't, I replied. It's out of print. I got this copy at a thrift store."
(which was true)
When the snobs wanted to play, I turned to the girls, and asked, "What do you say ladies? Want to quit playing, want me to leave?" they got the message, smirked and said no. We were not so subtly telling the clique snobs to go **** themselves. It was a good day.
I have no problem whatsoever with a MeetUp.com group restricting membership, but this event was "open to anyone". What I object to is the hostess choosing to abandon her obligation to make everyone feel included, especially novices.
