Why I say "**** online dating"

[Barbaloot]

I've met more than a few girls online, but not through dating sites. One made a permanent relocation and its still going well.

I met my girlfriend online too, on this site in fact.

That's great! (but now I'm wondering who it is :shy: )

A lot of success can be had from dating online, but a lot of it is looking in the right places. A lot of it is also presenting yourself well and maintaining reasonable expectations. I know quite a few people who have met their current spouses online, but they've opted for much more serious methods of finding a partner, rather than a casual dating site (since that wasn't what they were looking for.)

I hate it when women write 'say more than 'hi' in your message. Be interesting' - it's like your beneath them or something. Your not worthy of their attention. It's an awfull, awfull place.

I'm sorry, but comments like this bother me. A woman is not an awful person for choosing what kind of people she wants to have contact her. Even beyond weeding through messages from those uninteresting or undesirable, there are a lot of creepy, vulgar and sometimes potentially dangerous men out there. She has every right to be choosy. Women should be even choosier online.

 

[putter65]

I've met more than a few girls online, but not through dating sites. One made a permanent relocation and its still going well.

I met my girlfriend online too, on this site in fact.

That's great! (but now I'm wondering who it is :shy: )

A lot of success can be had from dating online, but a lot of it is looking in the right places. A lot of it is also presenting yourself well and maintaining reasonable expectations. I know quite a few people who have met their current spouses online, but they've opted for much more serious methods of finding a partner, rather than a casual dating site (since that wasn't what they were looking for.)

I hate it when women write 'say more than 'hi' in your message. Be interesting' - it's like your beneath them or something. Your not worthy of their attention. It's an awfull, awfull place.

I'm sorry, but comments like this bother me. A woman is not an awful person for choosing what kind of people she wants to have contact her. Even beyond weeding through messages from those uninteresting or undesirable, there are a lot of creepy, vulgar and sometimes potentially dangerous men out there. She has every right to be choosy. Women should be even choosier online.

i agree women should be carefull online and i imagine they get all kinds of horrible and vile messages.

But I don't like arrogance and these women come across as that. It puts me off sending them messages. Many women write nice stuff such as 'write me a message to find out more' - stuff like that is much nicer and appealing.

I think POF is like the real world in some ways. Lots of really nice women and lots of horrible ones.

 

[Unwanted94]

Superficially, match.com looks like a very unique website...until you subscribe. From what I've observed so far, it's not much different than any other site I've been on. The people, anyway. I assume that either everyone's stuck up prudes OR the majority aren't even subscribed. I've only been subscribed for about a day, so it may be too soon to even comment, but still.

 

[Trent]

the online dating scene is - in large part - populated by desperate men and women who know how to play this fact to their favor

plain and simple

if you are a man on an online dating site (with a genuine "seeming" profile, as opposed to drunk **** picks) then it is a safe assumption that you are:

- somewhat shy
- looking for a connection
- probably lonely
- not that outgoing, hence limited options

now, if i was a manipulative she-beast that liked to use men for my own validation with little or no consequence and little to no effort, where would i go to do that?

the answer: online dating websites

now, this doesn't mean that all women on these sites are this way, but the vast majority may well be, which is why i have never (and would never) even play that game

i'm not that desperate, have never been that desperate, and don't need people attempting to cruelly use me for their own satisfaction

unfortunately, the good girls (which i'm certain exist) are obscured by the ***** she-beasts.

 

[putter65]

the online dating scene is - in large part - populated by desperate men and women who know how to play this fact to their favor

plain and simple

if you are a man on an online dating site (with a genuine "seeming" profile, as opposed to drunk **** picks) then it is a safe assumption that you are:

- somewhat shy
- looking for a connection
- probably lonely
- not that outgoing, hence limited options

now, if i was a manipulative she-beast that liked to use men for my own validation with little or no consequence and little to no effort, where would i go to do that?

the answer: online dating websites

now, this doesn't mean that all women on these sites are this way, but the vast majority may well be, which is why i have never (and would never) even play that game

i'm not that desperate, have never been that desperate, and don't need people attempting to cruelly use me for their own satisfaction

unfortunately, the good girls (which i'm certain exist) are obscured by the ***** she-beasts.

I'm hearing you buddy !

 

[blackdot]

I would agree except I know a lot of females in person that use the dating websites. They are not terrible people of out for vengeance. Most women unfortunately have to put up with a lot of guys who just want to send nude photos of themselves.
None of these women fit me or I'd date one of them but still, I do know there are god women out there.

Free dating sites are the same as un-free ones except that on the un-free sites, you have a better chance of finding someone. I'm on both and the pay sites seem to attract more women that have no interest in dating.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I was on match.com for 6 months and never once had any type of message in my inbox or a "wink". That's why I don't do the pay sites. It's money down the drain.

 

[Unwanted94]

I was on match.com for 6 months and never once had any type of message in my inbox or a "wink". That's why I don't do the pay sites. It's money down the drain.

....but doesn't match.com have the 6 month guarantee or your money back? Or no? I thought I read that somewhere. Anyway, I am expecting the exact same thing. I told myself that if THIS fails, I will not resubscribe to this site nor any other site. I read many good reviews of match.com, but so far, to say the least; I am very disappointed.

 

[blackdot]

As I have gotten older, I get pretty much no messages on match anymore. I've hit the old man range where men become unwanted altogether.

When I did get messages, it was usually from women that had no interest in talking. Most were too busy to talk (which is also why they are on dating sites. They are too busy to meet people. Unfortunately they think that writing a short note in e-mail is also time consuming.) Some will get pissed off if you message them after they favorite or message you. Those are just completely strange. Some have no interest in meeting people and if you ever bring up the idea of meeting, they will run.

 

[putter65]

I was on match.com for 6 months and never once had any type of message in my inbox or a "wink". That's why I don't do the pay sites. It's money down the drain.

....but doesn't match.com have the 6 month guarantee or your money back? Or no? I thought I read that somewhere. Anyway, I am expecting the exact same thing. I told myself that if THIS fails, I will not resubscribe to this site nor any other site. I read many good reviews of match.com, but so far, to say the least; I am very disappointed.

i'm never paying again. Like you say money down the drain. POF is free and it doesn't do any harm having a profile on there. I have zero expectations though. I don't think there is anything wrong with the majority of the women on there. Trouble is they have dozens and dozens of men to pick from. I have no chance whatsoever.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I was on match.com for 6 months and never once had any type of message in my inbox or a "wink". That's why I don't do the pay sites. It's money down the drain.

....but doesn't match.com have the 6 month guarantee or your money back? Or no? I thought I read that somewhere. Anyway, I am expecting the exact same thing. I told myself that if THIS fails, I will not resubscribe to this site nor any other site. I read many good reviews of match.com, but so far, to say the least; I am very disappointed.

I did the cheap one without the guarantee. I figured if I didn't meet anyone in six months, why prolong the agony?

---

i'm never paying again. Like you say money down the drain. POF is free and it doesn't do any harm having a profile on there. I have zero expectations though. I don't think there is anything wrong with the majority of the women on there. Trouble is they have dozens and dozens of men to pick from. I have no chance whatsoever.

I agree. I'll save my money and blow it on something for me, or may go to an occasional singles meetup wondering if maybe some woman will return a smile or look across the bar or something. They're usually free and you just pay for what you drink.

 

[Trent]

don't beat yourselves up, guys

many of the women on those sites are 'broken', lol

yes, which is why they can't meet people in real life (or keep them in real life)

think about it, women on average, always have more potential suitors (because in our culture, man chases woman)

so what kind of woman has to resort to one of those sites?

if she isn't morbidly obese or hideously disfigured, she should be able to find a nice man to spend time with her (or more than one)

the question is...then...why can't she?

likely, because she is totally ****** in the head, had body dysmorphic disorder, thinks her market value is much higher than it is, is psychotic and manipulative and destructive, or is incredibly high maintenance.

YOU DON'T WANT THESE WOMEN, TRUST ME

for you guys that are not male models (i include myself in that category) you need to get out there and sell your best asset: YOU

you simply can't do that on websites, by design, they are superficial.

what? words and pictures. like that tells the story of you, gives the positive and cool vibe of you. no it doesn't.

those sites suck donkeyballs, don't beat yourselves up over it.

and most of those women are damaged, broken, ******, and insane

---

on a side note

the good news is that karma is a *****

once these women that have spend the two decades between the ages of 20 and 40 "playing the field"

they don't realize that their "market value" (in the same superficial market they've chosen to dwell) is fading and fades fast

what? no more ability to have babies? no more child support threats? no more perfect, wrinkle-free skin? oops, what's that a little cellulite? omigosh! glasses even - FOR SHAME! oh gosh, a little tummy too. holy crap, she is falling apart! then it's time to find a real man who will love her for her. problem is, all of those guys are gone, taken, or too jaded to give her a chance in her new enlightened stage.

can you blame her? if you had a golden ticket every morning when you woke up and it resided between your legs, tell me you wouldn't spend it.

it takes a rare woman to not be tempted by the powers of persuasion that her sexual attraction can hold over other people. she only damages and punishes herself if she dwells within this and forsakes all things real and spiritual.

it's all for waste anyway.

inevitably she'll have to get a couple of cats and an aging lesbian lover

 

[Limlim]

Dunno my sister in law doesn't seem too bad, bro met her on a dating site several years back.

 

[Trent]

Dunno my sister in law doesn't seem too bad, bro met her on a dating site several years back.

that's pretty cool

if i throw a dart at a dartboard 1,000 times i might get a bullseye too!

 

[Limlim]

So throw a 1000 darts?

 

[Tealeaf]

don't beat yourselves up, guys

many of the women on those sites are 'broken', lol

yes, which is why they can't meet people in real life (or keep them in real life)

think about it, women on average, always have more potential suitors (because in our culture, man chases woman)

so what kind of woman has to resort to one of those sites?

if she isn't morbidly obese or hideously disfigured, she should be able to find a nice man to spend time with her (or more than one)

the question is...then...why can't she?

likely, because she is totally ****** in the head, had body dysmorphic disorder, thinks her market value is much higher than it is, is psychotic and manipulative and destructive, or is incredibly high maintenance.

YOU DON'T WANT THESE WOMEN, TRUST ME

for you guys that are not male models (i include myself in that category) you need to get out there and sell your best asset: YOU

you simply can't do that on websites, by design, they are superficial.

what? words and pictures. like that tells the story of you, gives the positive and cool vibe of you. no it doesn't.

those sites suck donkeyballs, don't beat yourselves up over it.

and most of those women are damaged, broken, ******, and insane

---

on a side note

the good news is that karma is a *****

once these women that have spend the two decades between the ages of 20 and 40 "playing the field"

they don't realize that their "market value" (in the same superficial market they've chosen to dwell) is fading and fades fast

what? no more ability to have babies? no more child support threats? no more perfect, wrinkle-free skin? oops, what's that a little cellulite? omigosh! glasses even - FOR SHAME! oh gosh, a little tummy too. holy crap, she is falling apart! then it's time to find a real man who will love her for her. problem is, all of those guys are gone, taken, or too jaded to give her a chance in her new enlightened stage.

can you blame her? if you had a golden ticket every morning when you woke up and it resided between your legs, tell me you wouldn't spend it.

it takes a rare woman to not be tempted by the powers of persuasion that her sexual attraction can hold over other people. she only damages and punishes herself if she dwells within this and forsakes all things real and spiritual.

it's all for waste anyway.

inevitably she'll have to get a couple of cats and an aging lesbian lover

---

This mindset is a fine example of why I'm hesitant to meet anyone online. Never know how they're going to secretly view you if you had to be "broken" enough not to take one of the 10,000 perfectly compatible and kind suitors you're obviously swimming in as a woman.

For all I know, though, IRL guys around here might think this way, too.

****.

Cats, please!

 

[Trent]

perfectly compatible

that's a common excuse for not giving a whole bunch of guys a chance

because they supposedly aren't ^that^

most lonely guys just want "a good woman"

most women who (claim to be) lonely want a man that is "perfectly compatible"

ain't nothing perfect, sugar

 

[blackdot]

well, yet again another fire and a miss.
A female had contacted me some time back. Really cool and we were from the same area. Then suddenly she used the word "busy" in a sentence. That is the kiss of death of online dating.
Sure enough she vanished for a period. I finally got a response back. Her life got really busy so her had to re-prioritize things and take herself off dating websites.

The broken record continues.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

From another POV, playing devils advocate....

If a guy is on a dating site and none of the "broken" women are interested in him, why would a non-broken one be?

 

[Trent]

From another POV, playing devils advocate....

If a guy is on a dating site and none of the "broken" women are interested in him, why would a non-broken one be?

good question, bud

because a broken woman can NEVER have a true relationship, she will always self-sabotage or otherwise destroy it

but a non-broken woman has funcitonal morals, emotions, and thought processes. once she feels attraction and love for you, she is yours and you have a chance. plus a non-broken woman is confident enough to give a normal guy a chance because she is not looking for a guy to build her confidence, she is looking for a guy to suit her character.

i wish i could put a class on and teach ya'll a lot of what i've studied about dating and attraction.

there is a common misconception that women are wrapped up in physical appearance. this is not true. yes, there is an element of that. but it's something else, something that i daren't speak.