Women using men as *** objects

[Wandering stranger]

Recently I met a very attractive asian lady, we went to catch a movie (inception-terrible movie imo) since the theater was packed I felt it rude to engage in a full blown conversation amidst the movie-goers. I offered a bite to eat at the local applebee's and we had a cute conversation, needless to say I didn't want the night to end so young so after such an engaging conversation.

After another conversational outbreak at a convenience store since the applebee's closed I begrudgingly offered to continue our talk at my house. I didn't want to appear as though I wanted *** on our first date, she agreed to come over and talk some more. After 2 hours of engaging intercourse I noticed she was positioning herself to rub my nether region, it was playful at first ( my attempts to stave her groping ). Yet after 2 hours of her groping and saying she liked seeing me squirm as she teased me while repeating " don't worry you're not getting *** from me". I rebutted with " hey I'm quite fond of you, I don't want to have ***" but her persistence paid off and we engaged in sexual activity until the sun was rising.

Later she admitted she just wanted to use me for *** and that it was great. I've only met 3 women who have not had *** with me on the first encounter, 3....out of many.

I saw the post about men using women as *** objects but it's clearly not so in my case. In fact recently I dont' have the same sexual urges I used to have as a teenager, I've learned patience to a great degree but I feel as though if I don't do it they'll just find someone else and continue a strange pseudo friendship/relationship with me devoid of ***.

 

[Sean]

To be honest, I wouldn't mind if women used me for ***.

 

[SofiasMami]

Hi-
So just this woman used you for *** or all the previous women who slept with you on the first date used you too? I'm guessing you met most of these women at bars or clubs where the alcohol was flowing freely. Perhaps if you met them at a different time or place, the first date would have gone differently.
Welcome to the forum, by the way!

-Teresa

 

[Nyu001]

Do you think by letting them or in this case her using you as a "*** object" makes you like you was using her as a sexual object too by accepting *** to have fun for that moment when you are not in something deep with her? Even if was not originally your intention to have *** with her?

 

[nerdygirl]

*agreeing with Nyu001* Surely you weren't expecting a long term relationship when you had *** on the first date.

Also, us Asian girls are frisky.

 

[ShybutHi]

*** on the first date..... that surely kind of ruins any chances for a proper potential relationship for alot of people anyway, i suppose that is talking quite generally though.

I myself cant really talk on the subject though, being 23, a virgin and had only one girlfriend in my life.... what a rediculously shy pathetic loser i am.

 

[Yukhi]

*** on the first date..... that surely kind of ruins any chances for a proper potential relationship for alot of people anyway, i suppose that is talking quite generally though.

I myself cant really talk on the subject though, being 23, a virgin and had only one girlfriend in my life.... what a rediculously shy pathetic loser i am.

No you're not a shy pathetic loser. At least girls you'll meet in the future know they won't catch a disease from you.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Well, you certainly didn't have to sleep with her. People only do to you what you allow them to do. You allow females to use you for ***. Even if you still wanted to invite her over for some reason, you could have said no to ***. Instead, you agreed to it.

Wouldn't have mattered either way about the relationship. Because instead of being the girl who wanted to sleep with you but you turned her down, she's now the girl who used you for ***, and the relationship is awkward anyway.

Don't let people use you.

 

[Badjedidude]

I wouldn't mind a girl just using me either, mostly because I know where the line is between **** buddies and emotional/meaningful relationship... but a lot of people don't, so they can't handle it.

That kind of thing is only for single fun, and it's generally a one-shot deal. I see nothing entirely wrong with that. If I were in a serious relationship or looking for one, however, being used by a girl (other than my girlfriend, if I have one) would not be something I would allow to happen.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Hahahahaaaaa......Use me and abuse baby
I'm just another piece of meat , just another piece of meat.

 

[freedom]

Hi-
So just this woman used you for *** or all the previous women who slept with you on the first date used you too? I'm guessing you met most of these women at bars or clubs where the alcohol was flowing freely. Perhaps if you met them at a different time or place, the first date would have gone differently.
Welcome to the forum, by the way!

-Teresa

you hit the nail right on the head!

 

[SophiaGrace]

You feel manipulated dont you.

Say no and mean it. Be assertive.

 

[VanillaCreme]

So you're in love with her? Or you were in love with everyone else you slept with?

 

[Asterli]

Well Wandering stranger I never heard someone having that kind of characteristics. It's also a bit special but couldn't you just say that to her (I'm sorry, I am just a really honest guy (sometimes fataly for me)). Say that you like her and that you express that in a physical way which really doesn't have to mean ***. If she doesn't like hearing that, I only can say that you have take one step back and be physical when the moment is right.

 

[VanillaCreme]

You know I have to say, now that I'm thinking more about what you say, there's no potential love there. She admitted to you that she used you for something. That's not love.

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

keep in mind...

a lot of these younger girls have grown up in a completely sexually charged society. they've been seeing *** on tv, in music, on clothes, in conversation, on the internet, talk shows, their friends, in school, wherever, since they were toddlers.

a lot of girls feel pressured to put out. she may have said she was "using you for ***" because she felt that was the cool thing to say. she may have insisted on having *** with you the first night because that is what "she is supposed to do" whether her heart tells her to or not.

or she may simply have been using you for ***.

years ago, i would have said "she's a ****". well, a little age and a little perspective opens up more possible explanations into her behavior. and i don't think that sleeping together on the first meeting ruins potential for a relationship. it may not be the best way to start one, but i don't think it ruins all chances.

things aren't always so cut and dry. all situations are different. all people are different. she may have self-esteem issues and think the only way you will pay any attention to her is ***, ***, ***... i've met the type.

either way, your stories crack me up.

 

[Brian]

I'm guessing you met most of these women at bars or clubs where the alcohol was flowing freely. Perhaps if you met them at a different time or place, the first date would have gone differently.

You know, I'm really starting to hate it when people say this.

Bars are basically the only place people in my age bracket (20ish and worthless) go to socialize or pick up a date. Try either of those in a book store or other place and you're either creepy or interrupting.

 

[Badjedidude]

Try either of those in a book store or other place and you're either creepy or interrupting.

Only if you say creepy things when you talk to them. lol

Meeting a girl is about natural communication, and that can happen in a checkout line, at a gas pump while you're fillin your car, or even when you're washing your clothes at a laundromat or something. It's not the place that makes the difference, it's the attitude and personality that you show that makes it or breaks it.

A book store or other place may be easier for some guys simply because there are no expectations to look or be cool or sexy when in a book store... whereas in a club or bar, if you want to hookup, you pretty much have to look like the "in" sorta guy, and you probably also have to know how to dance.

*shrug*... Like I said, it's not the place. It's the person.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I'm guessing you met most of these women at bars or clubs where the alcohol was flowing freely. Perhaps if you met them at a different time or place, the first date would have gone differently.

You know, I'm really starting to hate it when people say this.

Bars are basically the only place people in my age bracket (20ish and worthless) go to socialize or pick up a date. Try either of those in a book store or other place and you're either creepy or interrupting.

It can seem creepy in any place. It's sometimes creepy in a bar. I think I'd prefer to meet someone in a book store.

 

[SofiasMami]

I'm guessing you met most of these women at bars or clubs where the alcohol was flowing freely. Perhaps if you met them at a different time or place, the first date would have gone differently.

You know, I'm really starting to hate it when people say this.

Bars are basically the only place people in my age bracket (20ish and worthless) go to socialize or pick up a date. Try either of those in a book store or other place and you're either creepy or interrupting.

Au contraire, mon frere, you're likely to meet a different type of person at Barnes & Noble on a Tuesday afternoon than you would at a pounding nightclub on Saturday night.
Granted, I'm past the 20ish age bracket but it's possible to meet women in a variety of circumstances. A party atmosphere just makes us feel less inhibited about talking to strangers, especially when everyone else is there for the same purpose. I don't personally know anyone who has met their life mate in a bar, though.

Teresa