CenotaphGirl
Under the dirt, that’s my home ⚰️
*warning this is longg ramblings and love life issues so read and laugh at me if you wish… no need to respond*
I decided to do something thoughtful for Rob. He is older than me so he has a picture of me in his wallet. I like it, as my dad used to do this with my mums picture so its very nostalgic to me. I gave him a new more … sexy? picture nothing naughty but showing a little more of my best assets rather than just my face
uhhh now …. For the men… how do you think that went? Good? WRONG!
It went terrible! Omg… so he looks at the picture, looks at me and says something romantic. We kiss and then he says he thinks i’ve lost my way religiously. He thinks I want to make him sin… he thinks I enjoy being tempting more than being religious and with him.
Ugh arrow through the chest… I told him he made me feel so ugly and to just forget it. He said he wants me to understand im beautiful and dont need to do more… but I want to do more, you know? Not to tempt but just to feel like im his… is that so crazy?
So in my typical fashion I did something I shouldnt have and put the picture up… somewhere that my stupid ex could see it as I knew as much as I hate him…he would know what I want to hear unlike Rob… and yeah he did text me some load of rubbish about being a better man and some wolf dribble about how hot I look in my new pic. The more men that complimented me the more guilty I felt so…I took it down and spoke to Rob instead. Also things have been good with my ex and I don’t wanna ruin it being a tempting skank like Rob thinks I am all of a sudden.
So the conversation went well and Rob agreed that he could have just admired the picture and not lectured me about my values. However, I cant help but wonder if I just caused all this drama or if it all just happened ? Why do I always do wrong? Am I nothing but trouble?
Rob is difficult for me to understand, he’s a man so I think okay, gotta be sexy for your man… right? But when I try I feel like he’s disgusted. When im just sitting around looking ugly then he showers me with wow you’re so perfect, or he starts asking me to show more.. I think perfect… but if I show more then he leaves the room… wtfff like its messing with my ego… men want me, always have. So what is the issue here
I think maybe im used to sinful behaviour and it shows idk… maybe I need to pray for guidance.

I decided to do something thoughtful for Rob. He is older than me so he has a picture of me in his wallet. I like it, as my dad used to do this with my mums picture so its very nostalgic to me. I gave him a new more … sexy? picture nothing naughty but showing a little more of my best assets rather than just my face

It went terrible! Omg… so he looks at the picture, looks at me and says something romantic. We kiss and then he says he thinks i’ve lost my way religiously. He thinks I want to make him sin… he thinks I enjoy being tempting more than being religious and with him.
Ugh arrow through the chest… I told him he made me feel so ugly and to just forget it. He said he wants me to understand im beautiful and dont need to do more… but I want to do more, you know? Not to tempt but just to feel like im his… is that so crazy?
So in my typical fashion I did something I shouldnt have and put the picture up… somewhere that my stupid ex could see it as I knew as much as I hate him…he would know what I want to hear unlike Rob… and yeah he did text me some load of rubbish about being a better man and some wolf dribble about how hot I look in my new pic. The more men that complimented me the more guilty I felt so…I took it down and spoke to Rob instead. Also things have been good with my ex and I don’t wanna ruin it being a tempting skank like Rob thinks I am all of a sudden.
So the conversation went well and Rob agreed that he could have just admired the picture and not lectured me about my values. However, I cant help but wonder if I just caused all this drama or if it all just happened ? Why do I always do wrong? Am I nothing but trouble?
Rob is difficult for me to understand, he’s a man so I think okay, gotta be sexy for your man… right? But when I try I feel like he’s disgusted. When im just sitting around looking ugly then he showers me with wow you’re so perfect, or he starts asking me to show more.. I think perfect… but if I show more then he leaves the room… wtfff like its messing with my ego… men want me, always have. So what is the issue here
