any advice on gaining confidence?

[Fvantom]

heres my situation, my main method of meeting new people is looking up local bands in my area and going to their shows, Im 20, almost 21, so theres a lot of bands around that age. Anyway, I have to meet people at those shows which is pretty hard because many of them Ive never seen before and talking to random new people is my weak spot. On top of that, Im usually going to these shows by myself which makes it even harder because Im that one dude that nobody knows.

So what sort of advice can you guys give that can help me confidently talk to these people that Ive never met before and try to make something out of nothing?

 

[Haz]

i'm assuming you are under drinking age where you are, but it helps facilitate things a little.... don't get too shitfaced though. smoking areas are great for having a reason to be around people talking, if you indulge

it really isn't too difficult to just muscle yourself into a group when there are large crowds of people, I often find hanging out by myself at a show there will be people nearby talking about the bands or music, if you've got something to add to the conversation by all means jump in, you'll find most people are receptive to this. then just introduce yourself, and go from there. often as the night goes on you'll have made some new friends, get numbers and contacts if things go well. if not, well at least you tried

 

[nerdygirl]

Talking to people can be difficult. It is easiest if you are confident about the topic, even if you're not so certain about yourself. Be sincere- don't try to force yourself to be funny or entertaining, because it often comes out as awkward, even creepy.

 

[Tiina63]

Do you think it might be a good idea to try other activities as well, such as evening classes or hobby groups where there should be others who are also alone? Also, it will be less noisy and crowded, so you should have a better chance of getting into conversation with someone.

 

[beans]

heres my situation, my main method of meeting new people is looking up local bands in my area and going to their shows, Im 20, almost 21, so theres a lot of bands around that age. Anyway, I have to meet people at those shows which is pretty hard because many of them Ive never seen before and talking to random new people is my weak spot. On top of that, Im usually going to these shows by myself which makes it even harder because Im that one dude that nobody knows.

So what sort of advice can you guys give that can help me confidently talk to these people that Ive never met before and try to make something out of nothing?

Hi, how often do you socialize? Usually a well socialized person is somebody who can talk about various topics and can never run out of something to say. Guess this comes with practice.

However, if you want confidence, just put on a smile. Smile as often as you can. There was this guy at our party last week and all the ladies loved him because of his smile. He always has a smile on his face. Even one of the ladies said she wishes she had his smile.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Just think everybody there is about as fucken lost and an anti social as you are....
In other words...they're not better than you.
They're all humans and thier **** fucken stinks.
Some of the **** people do to make themselve look slick hip and cool....are retarded to others.

So if you know this simple truth...why in the hell confidence an issue?
In other words you never lack confidence.

mmmm....maybe you migh had ran across A type personalities that thinks whatver the **** it is thier **** dont stink
Well...stop listiening to those retarded ******** and take whatever the **** they say like a grain of salt.

As far as social skills....
It simple exposure.
Everyone gose through a learning cruve.
You learn as you go....so dont trip.

 

[miloman]

heres my situation, my main method of meeting new people is looking up local bands in my area and going to their shows, Im 20, almost 21, so theres a lot of bands around that age. Anyway, I have to meet people at those shows which is pretty hard because many of them Ive never seen before and talking to random new people is my weak spot. On top of that, Im usually going to these shows by myself which makes it even harder because Im that one dude that nobody knows.

So what sort of advice can you guys give that can help me confidently talk to these people that Ive never met before and try to make something out of nothing?

You know, I don't think your the one and only dued who came alone. I was once pretty much as you are now,and looking back I now realize how much I missed by allowing myself to BELIEVE as you, That I was the SORE thumb everyone noticed,,,They noticed me cause I was being a LIVE fence post! if I had just let myself be THEM and quit worrying about assumptions, manifestations and all that crap, pretty soon it would have been like getting up in the night to take a leak with your eyes half closed,, ya just can't miss!
Go easy on yourself,, Now if you show up in a BIG BLACK LIMO,,exspect to get some attention, but being at a gathering,,,just get loose, and Bleeeeeend on in, and remember to not smile so big as to look like ya just took a hit of acid or to little to scare others off,,jsut be smooooth, listen and add too,,and quit concentrating on self.

 

[LoneKiller]

Have you tried going to a bar? What I mean is, if the bar has a pool table and a dart board which all of them do. Walk up to the pool table where others are playing, and place a "Loonie"(Canadian Dollar) on the edge of the table.

When your turn comes around, play the winner of the previous game. This is your ticket to introduce yourself, and begin casually talking with him or her during gameplay. Same with darts.

 

[DreamerDeceiver]

I don't know, but this is what works for me. Dressing comfortably in something that speaks for yourself (I always wear a band shirt and shorts, but that's just me). Cliché as it sounds, having a really fresh breath can bring a considerable boost to your confidence, and ability to speak clearly in public (i use the purple listerine).

 

[Cupcake Dog]

Take a deep breath, relax, lower your expectations, and just talk to them like you would with other people. Not everyone will like you, but you'll never meet anybody new if you don't try.