Are you lonelier than most?

[TheRealCallie]

Where did I freak out? Was it when I disagreed with you?

 

[Restless soul]

Then let me rephrase. In a healthy normal relationship. You should feel less lonley than someone who is just plain alone the time.
Not one where you are not a priority, and fights like cats and dogs.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Then let me rephrase. In a healthy normal relationship. You should feel less lonley than someone who is just plain alone the time.
Not one where you are not a priority, and fights like cats and dogs.

That's my entire point though, you don't know who is and is not in a "healthy, normal relationship."  Appearances can be very deceiving, believe me, I know.  Just because a relationship looks good in public, doesn't mean it is behind closed doors.

 

[Restless soul]

I guess you are right. But I will take whatever is behind closed doors. The. This

 

[Hopetracer]

Maybe what these people that are less lonely than us really know how to do is disguise it a lot better than a lot of us here.

I'm among the people who disguise loneliness irl since most of settings and gatherings I go to are either academic or work related. They are formal settings and the accepted behavior is not to get close and friendly with profs or/and employers over here anyway.

 

[Kianda]

Until you lived in another person's shoes, don't assume what their life if like.

This, and unless they share that information, one doesn't know how they feel deep down or what the reality of their day-to-day existence is like.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

I think I am smothered compared to most.

 

[MisterLonely]

Looking around me at the number of people living together, going out and having fun with friends, sociallizing then the answer would be a simple yes... I am more lonely then most

 

[Oldyoung]

Well, what can I say. I have things to be grateful for, and I do get somewhat well along with many people. Might be that I lack in the more close friendships though, but I think that's very rare anyway. Everyone is yearning for that.

And to be honest, I think my lack of energy actually makes me prefer to be less social than what I'd like to be. Lastly, there's the fact that I seem to have very little in common with people both in terms of interests and past experiences.

 

[samshaw]

It depends. It's both mental and physical. How much do you feel lonely and how actually you are? Also what kind of people are you comparing your loneliness with?

 

[Restless soul]

It depends. It's both mental and physical. How much do you feel lonely and how actually you are? Also what kind of people are you comparing your loneliness with?

The people sitting in starbucks

 

[samshaw]

It depends. It's both mental and physical. How much do you feel lonely and how actually you are? Also what kind of people are you comparing your loneliness with?

The people sitting in starbucks

It means you aren't comparing to a specific person or a group of people. You are comparing all the people who also come at the same time/not the same time when you do. You are bound to feel lonelier as these people have a lot more chance to not be lonely when they are there as often they go with others to starbucks. They may be lonely at some other points of their life but you don't know that. What can be said that you are looking at their life through a keyhole.
Sorry if anything offends you. I am new here.

 

[Restless soul]

Its, cool. Welcome. I actually started this thread a while back.

 

[samshaw]

Its, cool. Welcome. I actually started this thread a while back.

Did my answer help you in the least?It's important for me to know that.Be honest.

 

[Restless soul]

Its, cool. Welcome. I actually started this thread a while back.

Did my answer help you in the least?It's important for me to know that.Be honest.

Yes. Thanks.

 

[ditakelly]

The world has facebook syndrome nowerdays... they portray a picture that they are happy and fulfilled and yet in reality: "their husband is F*****ng the au pair, they are in mountains of debt and their kids failed their exams etc etc". Nobody talks about the bad stuff, or the sad stuff - like loneliness, which is a shame because that's the interesting stuff.


Anyway to answer your question, in general, those that I end up hanging round with (rarely) are similar to me, loners who like the occasional bit of company, however I have found that those guys tend to be alone through choice, its their natural disposition and so does not cause them to be distressed, so in that case maybe they are not really lonely. When I mix with general people, like yesterday at the hairdressers, they tend to be full of beans about their full social lives and certainly don't appear to be lonely.

In fact, I think most people are very scared of being lonely and so cram up their lives with as much stuff and people as possible, just not to outwardly look lonely.

 

[Restless soul]

The world has facebook syndrome nowerdays... they portray a picture that they are happy and fulfilled and yet in reality: "their husband is F*****ng the au pair, they are in mountains of debt and their kids failed their exams etc etc". Nobody talks about the bad stuff, or the sad stuff - like loneliness, which is a shame because that's the interesting stuff.


Anyway to answer your question, in general, those that I end up hanging round with (rarely) are similar to me, loners who like the occasional bit of company, however I have found that those guys tend to be alone through choice, its their natural disposition and so does not cause them to be distressed, so in that case maybe they are not really lonely. When I mix with general people, like yesterday at the hairdressers, they tend to be full of beans about their full social lives and certainly don't appear to be lonely.

In fact, I think most people are very scared of being lonely and so cram up their lives with as much stuff and people as possible, just not to outwardly look lonely.

I always like seeing my posts  revived always makes me feel a bit less lonley.