Are you spending Xmas alone?

[Solitary man]

Yeah all alone, I might as well be dead.

I know the feeling, and I deal with it by consuming copious quantities of mince pies and brandy butter.

 

[cumulus.james]

This year I shall be spending Xmas alone, as I have done for the past 15 years. All my immediately family are dead, and what extended family I have in England don't want to know me. I'm a chronic loner and social recluse. Truth be told, I'm also a bit of a misanthrope. I don't like most people. I live with a cat who is my only family and friend, and spend all my days without human company. I lost the ability to go out and socialise and make friends many years ago and live a solitary life beside the mountains.

I can go for long periods by myself without feeling lonely, but have found that Xmas time is when loneliness can really creep in on you. Like me, do you live alone? If so, how do you deal with Xmas time? How do you get through it?

I wil likely be spending it alone too. I have some relatives, but I always felt as alone as this even if I went there. I have spent all my birthdays alone too since I was a little boy. So I am quite used to this. I found myself howling in a field in the middle of nowhere on new years eve once in my early 20's. I had been on a chat room and everyone was talking about what they were doing and where they are going.

I have a bizarre song to associate with christmas. "The things you said" by Depeche Mode, atmospheric and gloomy. I was a teenager at the time and sat on my own (I used to stay up all night) with the christmas tree lights going. I don't think I had any friends at that point.

So I completely know how you feel. I don't even have a cat anymore.

 

[Solitary man]

This year I shall be spending Xmas alone, as I have done for the past 15 years. All my immediately family are dead, and what extended family I have in England don't want to know me. I'm a chronic loner and social recluse. Truth be told, I'm also a bit of a misanthrope. I don't like most people. I live with a cat who is my only family and friend, and spend all my days without human company. I lost the ability to go out and socialise and make friends many years ago and live a solitary life beside the mountains.

I can go for long periods by myself without feeling lonely, but have found that Xmas time is when loneliness can really creep in on you. Like me, do you live alone? If so, how do you deal with Xmas time? How do you get through it?

I wil likely be spending it alone too. I have some relatives, but I always felt as alone as this even if I went there. I have spent all my birthdays alone too since I was a little boy. So I am quite used to this. I found myself howling in a field in the middle of nowhere on new years eve once in my early 20's. I had been on a chat room and everyone was talking about what they were doing and where they are going.

I have a bizarre song to associate with christmas. "The things you said" by Depeche Mode, atmospheric and gloomy. I was a teenager at the time and sat on my own (I used to stay up all night) with the christmas tree lights going. I don't think I had any friends at that point.

So I completely know how you feel. I don't even have a cat anymore.

Oh you should get a cat, or a dog. I couldn't live without a little furry animal in my life. They're the greatest people on earth. Better than humans!

 

[cumulus.james]

I'm not sure what I'll be doing this Christmas and I feel sad about it. My immediate family is spread out over the 4 corners of the globe and I'm not interested in traveling over the holidays.

I'm not with my daughter's dad but he has brothers and my daughter has two half-sisters in town. But they're just not into Christmas traditions and family togetherness and all that. My ex and I have been trying to get them to make plans for Nochebuena and Christmas day but they're just not interested.
I have some friends with their own families and thought of asking if we can come over. But I feel kind of awkward doing that
I wish more businesses were open that day and tbere would be more options for us Christmas orphans.
Or maybe I should put an ad on Craigslist and just have an Open House for anyone with no place to go that day

-Teresa

That's a great idea, Teresa. An open house for Xmas day might prove to be many people's best Christmas ever.

My experiance of craigslist - DON'T POST AN INVITE ON THERE FOR GOD SAKE! Youll be ***** bummed and murderd for sure:club:

In the early days of gaydar, they used to have local chat rooms that eveyone would go on, it was like a little online community. Anyhow this caught the tail end of the gays from the 60's/70's & eraly 80's who were cut off from thier family for being gay. So they were alone. They used to take ech otehr in at christmass. I thought it was quite sweet, I wanted to go along but they were far older and I was just 20 or something. And as mentioned elsewhere I had some bad experiances with older men....

---

This year I shall be spending Xmas alone, as I have done for the past 15 years. All my immediately family are dead, and what extended family I have in England don't want to know me. I'm a chronic loner and social recluse. Truth be told, I'm also a bit of a misanthrope. I don't like most people. I live with a cat who is my only family and friend, and spend all my days without human company. I lost the ability to go out and socialise and make friends many years ago and live a solitary life beside the mountains.

I can go for long periods by myself without feeling lonely, but have found that Xmas time is when loneliness can really creep in on you. Like me, do you live alone? If so, how do you deal with Xmas time? How do you get through it?

I wil likely be spending it alone too. I have some relatives, but I always felt as alone as this even if I went there. I have spent all my birthdays alone too since I was a little boy. So I am quite used to this. I found myself howling in a field in the middle of nowhere on new years eve once in my early 20's. I had been on a chat room and everyone was talking about what they were doing and where they are going.

I have a bizarre song to associate with christmas. "The things you said" by Depeche Mode, atmospheric and gloomy. I was a teenager at the time and sat on my own (I used to stay up all night) with the christmas tree lights going. I don't think I had any friends at that point.

So I completely know how you feel. I don't even have a cat anymore.

Oh you should get a cat, or a dog. I couldn't live without a little furry animal in my life. They're the greatest people on earth. Better than humans!

I had 2 cats at one point

 

[sothatwasmylife]

Yep sadly....to be honest I envy you the cat....I would like a cat....but think I may overpower it with affection...or else it treat me with complete contempt and I'd still have to feed it...I have a couple of cloth based smiling doorstop type cats I'm fond of in a completely deranged way....deciding that they should enjoy a better visual outlook other than alongside the door...therefore I have no doorstops

 

[Solitary man]

Yep sadly....to be honest I envy you the cat....I would like a cat....but think I may overpower it with affection...or else it treat me with complete contempt and I'd still have to feed it...I have a couple of cloth based smiling doorstop type cats I'm fond of in a completely deranged way....deciding that they should enjoy a better visual outlook other than alongside the door...therefore I have no doorstops

"Cloth based smiling doorstop type cats" are not the genuine article though. Invest in a real cat, stroke the little fella, and listen to it purr. My cat's a great little companion. Some people don't like cats, I love my cat as much as I loved my Labrador dog.

 

[cumulus.james]

*mod edit ~ comment removed. Do not post something like that again.

 

[Erevetot]

due to me not believing i dont celebrate christmas.
I live with my parents again but my room used to be a storage room in the garden, so it's like i live alone. due to me not celebrating, I didnt really mind the last 5 years, it felt like any other lonely day, just full of lights and other decorations, I just drunk and played music or video games, or read a nice book while the rest of my family were celebrating.
This year though, i had special plans, me and my now ex girl were supposed to spend it together, and we actually had a lot of plans made. So, the closer we get to these days, the more it hurts :/

 

[EveWasFramed]

Nope. I have the kiddo.

 

[SofiasMami]

I wish more businesses were open that day and tbere would be more options for us Christmas orphans.
Or maybe I should put an ad on Craigslist and just have an Open House for anyone with no place to go that day

-Teresa

My experiance of craigslist - DON'T POST AN INVITE ON THERE FOR GOD SAKE! Youll be ***** bummed and murderd for sure:club:

Thanks for your concern, cumulus.james, that's very sweet
I am a very boring mother for my child's sake and that includes not posting on Craigslist.

-Teresa

 

[TheRealCallie]

I have kids, also.
We do Christmas at my house in the morning, then go over to my parents for the afternoon and their father takes them in the evening. So, while I won't be alone ALL day, I will be alone for what, to me, is the worst part of the day.

 

[Cucuboth]

While I won't be physically alone ... will have to spend Xmas Day with my parents, and whatever other relations turn up, and then Boxing Day with them and my sister's family ... I will be pretty much ignored the whole time, so, it is like spending Xmas alone anyway. I don't even get asked the "Have you got a girlfriend yet?" question anymore, and that was pretty much the only conversation I would get. Xmas will just be watching everyone else enjoy themselves and being reminded that I don't fit in and aren't wanted ....

 

[Ivyhouse]

Yes, most likely will spend Christmas alone for the third year since I left my marriage. Never knew how difficult being alone would be as friends and family all have their things to do. I really used to love the holidays (except for all the work)...now I just kind of wish them to be over.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Yes, most likely will spend Christmas alone for the third year since I left my marriage. Never knew how difficult being alone would be as friends and family all have their things to do. I really used to love the holidays (except for all the work)...now I just kind of wish them to be over.

I've been there. It gets better every year.

 

[Ivyhouse]

Yes, most likely will spend Christmas alone for the third year since I left my marriage. Never knew how difficult being alone would be as friends and family all have their things to do. I really used to love the holidays (except for all the work)...now I just kind of wish them to be over.

I've been there. It gets better every year.

Thank you for your encouragement. Think I've got a handle on it...and then the feelings kind of sneak up on me. But I keep working on it..

 

[Triple Bogey]

I was reading an article about this in one of my Mam's magazines.
They suggested doing some charity work for the homeless on xmas day.
I think that's a good idea !

 

[TheRealCallie]

I was reading an article about this in one of my Mam's magazines.
They suggested doing some charity work for the homeless on xmas day.
I think that's a good idea !

It's a fantastic idea, but, IMO, it shouldn't only be designated to Christmas. The homeless (and others) are in need every day of the year.

 

[cumulus.james]

While I won't be physically alone ... will have to spend Xmas Day with my parents, and whatever other relations turn up, and then Boxing Day with them and my sister's family ... I will be pretty much ignored the whole time, so, it is like spending Xmas alone anyway. I don't even get asked the "Have you got a girlfriend yet?" question anymore, and that was pretty much the only conversation I would get. Xmas will just be watching everyone else enjoy themselves and being reminded that I don't fit in and aren't wanted ....

Tahts how things work out for me too.

 

[Triple Bogey]

I was reading an article about this in one of my Mam's magazines.
They suggested doing some charity work for the homeless on xmas day.
I think that's a good idea !

It's a fantastic idea, but, IMO, it shouldn't only be designated to Christmas. The homeless (and others) are in need every day of the year.

I think they do try to help throughout the year but make a special effort on Christmas day.

I also saw on the news food banks are on the increase in the UK. People can't afford to eat apparently which I think is awful. Some baroness said it's because the poor can't cook. She later apologized.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I was reading an article about this in one of my Mam's magazines.
They suggested doing some charity work for the homeless on xmas day.
I think that's a good idea !

It's a fantastic idea, but, IMO, it shouldn't only be designated to Christmas. The homeless (and others) are in need every day of the year.

I think they do try to help throughout the year but make a special effort on Christmas day.

I also saw on the news food banks are on the increase in the UK. People can't afford to eat apparently which I think is awful. Some baroness said it's because the poor can't cook. She later apologized.

Food prices are pretty damn expensive. But, the poor can't cook? lol Wow, I can't tell you how many poor people I know (myself included) who can make a gourmet meal from scratch on very little.