Bed

[Puddled Duck]

Well I’ve decided to spend the rest of my life in bed.

It’s a momentous decision. But I’ve decided.

Ain’t getting out of bed, not even for great sex!.

 

[Puddled Duck]

Although I might get out of bed for a drink of milk.

 

[user 139760]

I wish I could financially have that one as a viable option. Sadly, my totalitarian government forces me to get out of bed to go to work to pay the over 75% taxes it charges me so it's members can invest in fiscal paradisex in the Bahamas and buy their 14th car. While I run around in over-crowded, under-maintenanced buses that are 20 years old and cost me a fortune.

If you can suggest a quick cashgrab scheme so that I can align my objectives with yours, I'd be much obliged.

 

[Puddled Duck]

And I’ve got some Rich Tea biscuits, so obviously I have to get out of bed for a Rich Tea buscuit.

 

[Puddled Duck]

I wish I could financially have that one as a viable option. Sadly, my totalitarian government forces me to get out of bed to go to work to pay the over 75% taxes it charges me so it's members can invest in fiscal paradisex in the Bahamas and buy their 14th car. While I run around in over-crowded, under-maintenanced buses that are 20 years old and cost me a fortune.

If you can suggest a quick cashgrab scheme so that I can align my objectives with yours, I'd be much obliged.

My god your a taxpayer, i’ve heard about people like you.

 

[Puddled Duck]

The nurse said to me ‘well you wake up in the morning, get out of bed and what do with yourself the rest of the day?’.

I said ‘I’m an insomniac, I don’t wake up in the morning and well I don’t get out of bed.’

 

[kaetic]

You might just end up really sore... And out of biscuits and milk at some point.

But good luck with that.

 

[ringwood]

And I’ve got some Rich Tea biscuits, so obviously I have to get out of bed for a Rich Tea buscuit.

Digestive biscuits? The ones with chocolate on top? THOSE are totally worth getting out of bed for too - get yourself some of those. 

 

[Puddled Duck]

You might just end up really sore... And out of biscuits and milk at some point.

But good luck with that.

What do you mean good luck with that.

I’ve been up this sort of stuff for five years.

---

And I’ve got some Rich Tea biscuits, so obviously I have to get out of bed for a Rich Tea buscuit.

Digestive biscuits? The ones with chocolate on top? THOSE are totally worth getting out of bed for too - get yourself some of those. 

I’ll meet your Digestive biscuits and raise you a Jaffa Cake.

 

[Puddled Duck]

Anyone know what I can do in bed?

Suggestions please...

 

[user 139760]

...what can you NOT do in bed?
Besides sports. Maybe construction too. Besides that, it's all fair game.
I'd start with making sure to be able to stay in bed so no one turns you into a taxpayer. That's a trick I don't know how to pull though.
I've this idea of following courses online, reading in bed and doing a PHd while never getting out of it.

 

[Puddled Duck]

5 years now.

It’s difficult, it’s probably the ultimate in lonely.

The bloody cat has nicked my space on the bed again. Can’t even have my bed to itself.

 

[IncolaVacui]

Alright Lennon...just imagine all the people...

 

[Puddled Duck]

Alright Lennon...just imagine all the people...

Well at least you didn’t post a YouTube song video.

I’m looking for seriously suggestions of what to do in bed.

Things like read a book, masturbate, play my PlayStation Vita, that sort of thing.

What I don’t want is something that would get Yoko Ono wet.

 

[Tiina63]

If you get chocolate digestives, make sure they are the dark choc ones as they are gorgeous.

 

[Joturbo]

If you get chocolate digestives, make sure they are the dark choc ones as they are gorgeous.

I dunno 2x milk choccy ones melted over an open fire eaten as a chocco sandwich...yum yum

 

[kaetic]

If you had a portable TV... You could always watch BBC news.

 

[Puddled Duck]

If you had a portable TV... You could always watch BBC news.

I’d like a TV in the bedroom.

BBC News 24 is the only thing I can watch, but you can’t watch it for more than a hour because it’s pretty much on a constant loop.

For 5 years I’ve been fighting chronic generalised anxiety disorder, with something like a bottle of vodka a day. Seriously not joking. Haven’t minded a bed for 5 years because most of the time I’ve been pissed. I told Mental Health Services to sort chronic generalised anxiety disorder, pressed them constantly for 6 months to sort it!. They did absolutely nothing!. Within six months I sorted it!, with a bottle of vodka a day.

But I’ve got to stop drinking because I’ve run out of money. I can’t afford £20 a day on vodka and that’s what I’ve been spending. But i’m a chronic alcoholic. I got some Christmas money from Rosie and my dad, that went on alcohol, don’t really have that much recollection of anything since Christmas and coming to end of January.

The bed is now going to ‘bite hard’.

 

[Puddled Duck]

It works like this you see......

It’s 8.20 pm UK time......

But I’m not pissed.....

So I won’t sleep, if I sleep again in the next three days i’ll be amazed....

I’ll get through the night but it’ll come to 5am.

Well there’s a paper shop about twenty minute walk away, he opens up at 5.15am and well he has a little off licence and all the ingredients 1L bottle of vodka, bottle of lemonade and ice cubes.

It’s just a question whether I’m on his doorstep at 5.15am.

8am double trouble....

Waitrose opens up and that’s just 5 minutes down the road and they’ve got all the ingredients.

I might resist the paper shop at 5.15 am, that’s a twenty walk, but Waitrose 5 minutes away at 8am.

I got 3 days (and nights) straight on bed (no sleep) battling chronic alcoholism.

This is what happens when mental health services don’t do there job.