being aggressively assertive

[TheSkaFish]

Mentally normal people don’t need scapegoats to make themselves feel good in life.

Mentally normal people don't choose to immediately go ballistic on someone as a first course of action, especially over something as trivial as a free ice cream. An individual ice cream probably costs the theater barely anything, you really think they wouldn't have just given you one if you'd asked calmly? I still don't understand how you knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that she intentionally missed you, instead of just making an honest mistake. Seems like a huge jump to conclusions. If your big thing is to "go by the book", then generally, in first-world countries, a person is assumed innocent until proven guilty. I haven't seen any real proof that she missed you on purpose.

I don’t allow anybody to undermine me sbd I don’t select either. Maybe you’re prihdctibg since you reckon you’re above rules or something.

OK dude. I still want to see you try this behavior on a bigger guy, and see what happens. Good luck with that.

 

[theablekingathelstan]

the size, ***, or age of the person doesn't matter. if that person aggresses against somebody, why do they assume others will accept it, due to their size? that's being a bully, and they have no real greater right on Earth than anybody else. only sociopaths by definition think that (read the DSM it's in there). i stand by my points. i'm going around in circles now, but i'll end now by saying:

- the worker clearly wished to show me up. i did nothing to her, and she thought i was "nothing' by ignoring me.

- the worker looked very shocked when i shouted at her, which made her look silly. She had the intention of trying to single me out badly, but then tried to claim being the victim, and the wronged party. BACkFIRED, *****!!

- i'm a human being and won't be subject to treatment like that. so if i swore and they banned me from their place for good, so be it. why must i go anywhere where the people claim to "despise" me and assume I must take their jibing? **** 'em.

- people defending bad service here are comical. they've probably never worked customer service before, or unprofessional in how they approach life, or there is some secret customer service practice I'm unaware of. Do you ******* job, and serve a customer no matter who they f they are. unless it's what the manager or the company's policies state, you do it. maybe also learn some f-ing social skills - it's AMUSING AS **** that a random stranger CARES if you like them or not. I can dislike a person hypothetically for being short, or tall, or fat, thin, white, black, male, female, cis, trans, straight or gay. so what? that's on ME. If a person dislikes another, it's always on THEM. not the object of their dislike. It's people here who probably play favourites and let these people not develop any social awareness and integration skills. like the world has to care whom you dislike hahaha. learn some ******* humility too. if you "dislike" somebody, grin and bear it and don't act like the world has to conform. that's narcissism to the max, and as i said, bad social reasoning/conduct.

- if this worker was 'perturbed by my acts" i didn't and don't give a ****. did she stop to think why i reacted that way, and her contribution to the situation? i doubt it. narcissistic. again, do you f-ing job. if you want respect, then give it out. if there is any lesson here, then perhaps, ms. ***** since that's what you are, do your job diligently in future. any job you do requires that as a bare minimum.

So, no finally (and I mean it this time) i don't think what i did was wrong. maybe you are offended at a person you "dislike" getting ahead in life. I'd ask why you think your projection/perception of somebody matters that much, and i genuinely pity you. Since you have this energy to keep a person down to suit your inner kicks and emotional complex, and not for any real rational reason. I spent today doing my regular job, and coming home and watching Twitch and playing games. I don't spend energy on identifying somebody to keep down - it's evil and not worth my energy just for my infantile kicks/inner scope.

 

[TheSkaFish]

the size, ***, or age of the person doesn't matter. if that person aggresses against somebody, why do they assume others will accept it, due to their size? that's being a bully, and they have no real greater right on Earth than anybody else.

They would be the defender in this scenario. You are the aggressor. And the size, ***, and age absolutely do matter, because there's a big difference between yelling at the vast majority of women, and a guy with at least as much or more muscle than you. I don't think that you, or people who think like you, who seem to have similar personalities, have the balls to start **** with a bigger man where you'd have a good chance at losing a physical fight and getting hurt, and more than that, getting humiliated and made to feel weak, powerless, and low-status. Cause that's your whole thing, might makes right, survival of the fittest, the deserving superior strong should rule over the undeserving inferior weak - very Hitler-like by the way - and if you were confronted with the fact that you are not in fact on the "fittest" side, it would wreck you. I think you only pick on easy targets where you're all but guaranteed a win, so you can continue to feed your delusions of grandeur that you're a member of some kind of superior class. You wouldn't dare risk putting yourself in a situation that could shatter your ego.

Of course, feel free to prove me wrong - and take the risk - any time.

You picked on someone probably not making a lot of money, and physically weaker than you, probably a young girl. And you're telling me you're not a bully? All the while being a 40 year old dude flipping out over an ice cream snack like an elementary school kid. That's lame.

so if i swore and they banned me from their place for good, so be it.

Great, I hope they do. If you ask me, this "customer is always right" **** needs to end. If a customer can't behave in a respectful manner, they don't deserve the privilege of doing business at that establishment. Nobody should be subjected to abuse, including at work. Employees can be fired for being bad employees, but customers should also be able to be fired of sorts, for being bad customers. They don't need you or your money. Plenty of other people are willing to go to the business and act normally.

people defending bad service here are comical.

You get what you pay for. Or, don't expect someone to care more than they get paid, to care more than the quality of life they can have for it. Bare minimum pay, bare minimum service. Want better service? Go to a more expensive venue that probably pays their staff better, for a more "professional" experience.

That's another thing - I have to say, your aristocratic attitude is anachronistic and weird. Actually I think it's OK to act like people did in the past, if you want. But you seem to have only taken the offensive, classist attitudes.

But not even taking that into account, it's probably just an honest mistake that could happen to anyone. You're acting like they ****** up your car, over a consumable that would be gone in under five minutes, that they supposedly denied you on purpose, with no other proof than you saying so, which, frankly, isn't very reliable. I hope you never make any mistakes at work, or that if you do, you are treated the same way.

maybe also learn some f-ing social skills - it's AMUSING AS **** that a random stranger CARES if you like them or not....

It's people here who probably play favourites and let these people not develop any social awareness and integration skills.

learn some ******* humility too.

if you "dislike" somebody, grin and bear it and don't act like the world has to conform. that's narcissism to the max, and as i said, bad social reasoning/conduct.

did she stop to think why i reacted that way

She probably thought you were off your meds, and/or high on coke. Or perhaps bath salts.

if you want respect, then give it out.

Dude stop, you're killing me!

maybe you are offended at a person you "dislike" getting ahead in life.

Last I checked you were still older than me with no girlfriend so...nah.

i genuinely pity you.

I spent today doing my regular job, and coming home and watching Twitch and playing games.

 

[TheSkaFish]

PS - all that and no Hitler? I'm disappointed. I was hoping to get at least one so I could give Callie and Kaetic a run for their money.

 

[user 135671]

 

[theablekingathelstan]

They would be the defender in this scenario. You are the aggressor. And the size, ***, and age absolutely do matter, because there's a big difference between yelling at the vast majority of women, and a guy with at least as much or more muscle than you. I don't think that you, or people who think like you, who seem to have similar personalities, have the balls to start **** with a bigger man where you'd have a good chance at losing a physical fight and getting hurt, and more than that, getting humiliated and made to feel weak and powerless. Cause that's your whole thing, might makes right, survival of the fittest, the deserving superior strong should rule over the undeserving inferior weak - very Hitler-like by the way - and if you were confronted with the fact that you are not in fact on the "fittest" side, it would wreck you. I think you only pick on easy targets where you're all but guaranteed a win, so you can continue to feed your delusions of grandeur that you're a member of some kind of superior class. You wouldn't dare risk putting yourself in a situation that could shatter your ego.

Of course, feel free to prove me wrong - and take the risk - any time.

You picked on someone probably not making a lot of money, and physically weaker than you, probably a young girl. And you're telling me you're not a bully? All the while being a 40 year old dude flipping out over an ice cream snack like an elementary school kid. That's lame.



Great, I hope they do.



You get what you pay for. Or, don't expect someone to care more than they get paid, to care more than the quality of life they can have for it. Bare minimum pay, bare minimum service. Want better service? Go to a more expensive venue that probably pays their staff better, for a more "professional" experience.

That's another thing - I have to say, your aristocratic attitude is anachronistic and weird. Actually I think it's OK to act like people did in the past, if you want. But you seem to have only taken the offensive, classist attitudes.

But not even taking that into account, it's probably just an honest mistake that could happen to anyone. You're acting like they ****** up your car, over a consumable that would be gone in under five minutes, that they supposedly denied you on purpose, with no other proof than you saying so, which, frankly, isn't very reliable. I hope you never make any mistakes at work, or that if you do, you are treated the same way.










She probably thought you were off your meds, and/or high on coke. Or perhaps bath salts.



Dude stop, you're killing me!



Last I checked you were still older than me with no girlfriend so...nah.

I'm not perfect, and i own up to mistakes i make at work.
and customer service by definition exists in all places - it should since all places want money and revenue. I like how you make all these suppositions of my beliefs. I dobn't believe in survival of the fittest. And I've shouted at "big people" before. so what? they're people, what's special about them? I like how my views on online incels have triggered you that in every instance you bring up my supposed moral system. Might makes right is a sociopathic ideology - that's not who I am or whom I wish to be, ever. Things in life should be gained via negotiation, not force.
And saying one should get a product in a satisfactory manner is anachronistic. Like customer service didn't exist decades ago. You've lost me. Like go to a "low-class" place like McDs and order a Big Mac and fries and get a Quarter Pounder and fries - no need for customer service since they got your order wrong... (note that's a major part of good customer service, meeting customers' expectations).

I still stand by my initial points. We're going around in circles, so we both know where we all stand here.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I like how my views on online incels have triggered you that in every instance you bring up my supposed moral system.

It was enough to get me to dislike you, since I don't like anyone who dismisses people struggling with even being "OK" in life, and has no understanding for people who fall through the cracks. I don't like anyone who believes that life is nothing more than hierarchical competition, and that people who are down and out should just accept that they are inherently inferior, and resign themselves to a life of misery, and that they should also submit to people who just randomly got lucky. As someone who has fallen through the cracks myself, I understand how easy it is to happen to someone, and it has nothing to do with being a good or bad person. Sometimes it doesn't even have to do with being smart. It can happen to you even if you're trying to play the game according to the rules. I feel like invalidating people that struggle with just getting to "normal" in life, and treating them with contempt, is ****** - something that people do who only got lucky, and act all smug, self-righteous, and superior about it, stroking their ego at being society "insiders", just so happening to be the kind of people that life works out for (or more likely, people who just want to pretend they are "insiders", for an ego boost), and have too much arrogance and hubris, and not enough self-awareness, to realize that they are just lucky, not special. And that if things were just a little different, the poor person/incel/whatever, would be them.

But it's far from the only example I've seen of your "supposed" moral system. I feel like I have enough of an insight into your thinking and character to know that it is so far away from mine, and opposite, that I find it hostile and offensive. Which you are free to be. But I don't have to like it or be OK with it.

I'm not perfect, and i own up to mistakes i make at work.

OK, so given that, would you like to be treated the same way you treat others? There's really no point answering, cause you'd probably just say "sure" but until it happens it's entirely theoretical.

I read an article recently that said that Elon Musk often blows up at his employees, telling them things like they are not smart enough to work on that problem, and things like that. It, along with other issues, definitely made me lose respect for him, regardless of his money, fame, or intellect. Maybe not everyone does but I value character over all those things, and all those things without character are worthless to me. A gifted *******, to me, is just an ******* that got lucky with their genetics. I have zero respect for them. I'd rather work with, and for, a less gifted but nicer person that I genuinely respected and liked.

You're telling me you'd be OK working for a person who treats you this way?

And I've shouted at "big people" before. so what? they're people, what's special about them?

The difference is that it is riskier for you to do that and not the guaranteed win that I feel you'd seek out. And I'm not talking about overweight people, I'm talking about muscular people.

I don't know. Maybe you have. If so, they are better people than I would be, if I was them. That's for sure.

I dobn't believe in survival of the fittest.

Might makes right is a sociopathic ideology - that's not who I am or whom I wish to be, ever. Things in life should be gained via negotiation, not force.

lol OK

 

[ardour]

If it's not a troll then we're just feeding into his persecution complex. Mentally stable grown men don't spit the dummy over free ice creams, shout at service staff or go into long rambles over such nonsense.

Get counselling and learn to manage your anger, or else you may end up getting some free dental work.

 

[user 135671]

Get counselling and learn to control your anger

This is why I've chosen to keep silent from now on. If he's not a troll he defo needs professional help which I'm not trained to give and I don't want to say anything that will make his situation worse.

Peace and love

 

[TheSkaFish]

And saying one should get a product in a satisfactory manner is anachronistic. Like customer service didn't exist decades ago. You've lost me. Like go to a "low-class" place like McDs and order a Big Mac and fries and get a Quarter Pounder and fries - no need for customer service since they got your order wrong... (note that's a major part of good customer service, meeting customers' expectations).

I'm not saying that expecting reasonable customer service is anachronistic. I was saying the way you seem to talk and act and view the world, seems anachronistic, like you view and carry yourself like an aristocrat from 150 years ago, like you believe you're a member of some kind of inherently superior class of person, and that the inferior rabble need to get in line and know their place. That's how it seems to me. It was a related but separate point.

Regardless, you can still resolve customer service issues in an assertive but calm manner, just stating the facts without acting like a maniac. And you probably would have a greater chance of getting what you want.

We're going around in circles, so we both know where we all stand here.

For once, I concur.

 

[Minus]

- the worker clearly wished to show me up. i did nothing to her, and she thought i was "nothing' by ignoring me.

- the worker looked very shocked when i shouted at her, which made her look silly. She had the intention of trying to single me out badly, but then tried to claim being the victim, and the wronged party. BACkFIRED, *****!!

Other than your assumed magical mind reading ability, you mention noting to support the idea that she wished to show you up. I don't doubt that her accidentally missing you could have made you feel "ignored" or like "nothing". Still you have shown absolutely nothing to indicate that it was anything more than a simple accident.

I imagine she did look shocked at your totally irrational behavior. You generally don't see grown men throwing tantrums over ice cream. Extreme bizarre irrational behavior can shock some people. You haven't mentioned, before, anything about her claim that she was a victim of your bizarre behavior, even though she was. It seems that you are padding out the story now because quite a number of people here have pointed out how poorly you acted based on invalid assumption that you made about the employee.

 

[TheRealCallie]

And immediately after he threw a fit and got his free ice cream THAT HE HAD A ******* RIGHT TO HAVE IF THAT DAMN HITLER CHURCH GOING ***** WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN OUT TO GET HIM!!!!......

 

[theablekingathelstan]

Non

It was enough to get me to dislike you, since I don't like anyone who dismisses people struggling with even being "OK" in life, and has no understanding for people who fall through the cracks. I don't like anyone who believes that life is nothing more than hierarchical competition, and that people who are down and out should just accept that they are inherently inferior, and resign themselves to a life of misery, and that they should also submit to people who just randomly got lucky. As someone who has fallen through the cracks myself, I understand how easy it is to happen to someone, and it has nothing to do with being a good or bad person. Sometimes it doesn't even have to do with being smart. It can happen to you even if you're trying to play the game according to the rules. I feel like invalidating people that struggle with just getting to "normal" in life, and treating them with contempt, is ****** - something that people do who only got lucky, and act all smug, self-righteous, and superior about it, stroking their ego at being society "insiders", just so happening to be the kind of people that life works out for (or more likely, people who just want to pretend they are "insiders", for an ego boost), and have too much arrogance and hubris, and not enough self-awareness, to realize that they are just lucky, not special. And that if things were just a little different, the poor person/incel/whatever, would be them.

But it's far from the only example I've seen of your "supposed" moral system. I feel like I have enough of an insight into your thinking and character to know that it is so far away from mine, and opposite, that I find it hostile and offensive. Which you are free to be. But I don't have to like it or be OK with it.



OK, so given that, would you like to be treated the same way you treat others? There's really no point answering, cause you'd probably just say "sure" but until it happens it's entirely theoretical.

I read an article recently that said that Elon Musk often blows up at his employees, telling them things like they are not smart enough to work on that problem, and things like that. It, along with other issues, definitely made me lose respect for him, regardless of his money, fame, or intellect. Maybe not everyone does but I value character over all those things, and all those things without character are worthless to me. A gifted *******, to me, is just an ******* that got lucky with their genetics. I have zero respect for them. I'd rather work with, and for, a less gifted but nicer person that I genuinely respected and liked.

You're telling me you'd be OK working for a person who treats you this way?



The difference is that it is riskier for you to do that and not the guaranteed win that I feel you'd seek out. And I'm not talking about overweight people, I'm talking about muscular people.

I don't know. Maybe you have. If so, they are better people than I would be, if I was them. That's for sure.




lol OK

infint believe in it. I believe we’re all warranted an equal space. I also believe that I nicer to people more on average than you are and way less hypocritical about it.if you’re in the wrong then accept you’re wrong and move on. You’re not any more worthy on this space. The fact you’re some big dude is immaterial

 

[theablekingathelstan]

O

If it's not a troll then we're just feeding into his persecution complex. Mentally stable grown men don't spit the dummy over free ice creams, shout at service staff or go into long rambles over such nonsense.

Get counselling and learn to manage your anger, or else you may end up getting some free dental work.

or who complains about trite posts but posts them himself. Ok… sort your ego out. You got no right to dictate how things are done in a place you hold no jurisdiction in.

 

[theablekingathelstan]

It was enough to get me to dislike you, since I don't like anyone who dismisses people struggling with even being "OK" in life, and has no understanding for people who fall through the cracks. I don't like anyone who believes that life is nothing more than hierarchical competition, and that people who are down and out should just accept that they are inherently inferior, and resign themselves to a life of misery, and that they should also submit to people who just randomly got lucky. As someone who has fallen through the cracks myself, I understand how easy it is to happen to someone, and it has nothing to do with being a good or bad person. Sometimes it doesn't even have to do with being smart. It can happen to you even if you're trying to play the game according to the rules. I feel like invalidating people that struggle with just getting to "normal" in life, and treating them with contempt, is ****** - something that people do who only got lucky, and act all smug, self-righteous, and superior about it, stroking their ego at being society "insiders", just so happening to be the kind of people that life works out for (or more likely, people who just want to pretend they are "insiders", for an ego boost), and have too much arrogance and hubris, and not enough self-awareness, to realize that they are just lucky, not special. And that if things were just a little different, the poor person/incel/whatever, would be them.

But it's far from the only example I've seen of your "supposed" moral system. I feel like I have enough of an insight into your thinking and character to know that it is so far away from mine, and opposite, that I find it hostile and offensive. Which you are free to be. But I don't have to like it or be OK with it.



OK, so given that, would you like to be treated the same way you treat others? There's really no point answering, cause you'd probably just say "sure" but until it happens it's entirely theoretical.

I read an article recently that said that Elon Musk often blows up at his employees, telling them things like they are not smart enough to work on that problem, and things like that. It, along with other issues, definitely made me lose respect for him, regardless of his money, fame, or intellect. Maybe not everyone does but I value character over all those things, and all those things without character are worthless to me. A gifted *******, to me, is just an ******* that got lucky with their genetics. I have zero respect for them. I'd rather work with, and for, a less gifted but nicer person that I genuinely respected and liked.

You're telling me you'd be OK working for a person who treats you this way?



The difference is that it is riskier for you to do that and not the guaranteed win that I feel you'd seek out. And I'm not talking about overweight people, I'm talking about muscular people.

I don't know. Maybe you have. If so, they are better people than I would be, if I was them. That's for sure.




lol OK

I don’t care if you dislike me. As a wise man accept others opinions. You have this complex where you think you’re above. Like why s your view of me of any pertinence? I’m sure there are people who dislike you for your opinions. Is that any worse? It’s your narcissistic interpersonal skills that maje me dislike you. Clearly some book you read or religious institution you attended made you think this wsy a as bad it’s assuming.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I believe we’re all warranted an equal space. I also believe that I nicer to people more on average than you are and way less hypocritical about it.if you’re in the wrong then accept you’re wrong and move on. You’re not any more worthy on this space.

If your "nicer to people more on average than me" includes blowing up at people at the drop of a hat, over trivial things, then I really must be Hitler. It makes sense now.

Don't even get me started on the hypocritical stuff either. Your first post here was complaining about how people aren't nice to you. Then it was quickly revealed that you weren't nice to people either, and went on about how you hated hot women. I may have had my struggles with dating but at least I never said things like that.

The fact you’re some big dude is immaterial

I'm not a big dude, although I would like to be. I was just saying, based on what I've seen of your personality, I don't think you'd start fights with big dudes. I think you'd look for an easy win where the risk to you is very low. Even now, I'm still not entirely sure you ever did yell at big guys, cause this the internet where you can say anything. There's no proof other than you saying you did, which is questionable.

I don’t care if you dislike me. As a wise man accept others opinions.

OK then. Apply it to yourself, and accept mine. It seems you're just mad that people aren't just accepting your opinions, but you don't accept others' in return. It doesn't work if it's a one-way street.

I’m sure there are people who dislike you for your opinions. Is that any worse?

I'm sure there are too, but they tend to be people with personalities and worldviews similar to yours, so it doesn't bother me. I expect it, it's mutual.

It’s your narcissistic interpersonal skills that maje me dislike you.

Are you serious? Everything I've seen from you suggests you're a narcissist. This whole thread, and the incident it was based on, were narcissistic in the first place.

Clearly some book you read or religious institution you attended made you think this wsy a as bad it’s assuming.

Well Christ on a cracker. I'm getting tired of this. And I thought for once we were in agreement, about how this discussion was going around in circles and that there was nothing else to say about it.

Unless, that is, you are going to give me more Hitlers to increase my score.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Has Christ ever been on a cracker? I know he's been on lots of toast, but I'm not sure about a cracker.....

Also, stop trying to pad your score. You just hate that I'm more Hitler like than you.

 

[Abstamyous]

Unless, that is, you are going to give me more Hitlers to increase my score.

I think you should ditch Hitler and go full Darth Vader or Sauron.

 

[roses4all]

Yes I would

Yes I would have I’ve done it before and will do it again.

so you said that you didn't stand up for yourself in your youth. I get that. I didn't either. It took me a long time and a lot of work on myself to say no. I am sorry for the child and the youth that you were. As a child or youth, we are weaker than the adults. We are trapped and we have to take it.

Like there is a winner and a loser. The person that yells or insults or reprimands etc is the winner and the person who gets yelled at is the loser. Maybe even the adults who did that to you said that you deserved it. Did you deserve it?

So now there is the mentality... win or lose... and you are making sure you are the winner. But you are also making sure that there is a loser. Why? There could be 2 winners. You could say, ''excuse me, I didn't get one, may I have one too?'' And you get the ice cream and a smile and maybe preferential treatment next time, or a date. Don't you think 2 winners is better?

But I totally agree, we all have to stand up for ourselves and not let others yell at us. (So you yelled at her, and she should, by the same definition, stand up for herself).

There doesn't have to be a winner and a loser. It is narcissic mentality.

Take care and try to have your best life. Try to create win-win situations. And don't let someone else be the winner and you the loser. But don't make someone the loser, so you can be the winner.

 

[roses4all]

and if some worker wishes to humiliate me for no reason, ... I won't be made to look foolish

she took me for some fool, ... i'm a human,

not try to “humiliate” HUNSN BEINGS who had as much a right to there as anybody else.

i won't be put down in public by anybody, and i've had my fill of that. No more of that for me.

they enjoy trying to embarrass people publicly ….

... I wont be excluded. She tried to mess with me

So, you felt humiliated, you felt she was making a fool of you, you felt humiliated, you felt put down in public, and you felt embarrassed in public....
this is why the whole thing happened.