Do you ever have people disbelieve you when you say you don't have friends?

[SophiaGrace]

This happens to me sometimes. I dont understand why people try to tell me I do when I don't?

I mean, i have one friend and one possible friend at college. but when i try to tell people i have difficulty making friends they act as though it's impossible. I find it weird that they behave like that.

 

[DesertWolf]

Yeah, I get that a lot too. Apparently a few people who talk to me briefly every few months mostly about non-personal things qualify as friends, and I'm not supposed to feel lonely.

I think a lot of people just have difficulty putting themselves in other's shoes and have no idea what it's like. That's why they also tell depressed people to just "snap out of it" like it's that simple.

 

[passage]

I would never admit to that.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I would never admit to that.

well good for you

 

[whispers]

That's why they also tell depressed people to just "snap out of it" like it's that simple.

LOL, i got that one so many times... pissed me right off. But you know, i think we are stronger in the long run because , depression can trigger changes in our lives. Most people just play the game, like the stepford wives lol, and deny their true emotions.

i have always had friends... at least one. But i do beleive that it is possible to not have any, ive seen it. I'm thankfull forums like this exist so everyone can have some kind of social life.

 

[DesertWolf]

LOL, i got that one so many times... pissed me right off. But you know, i think we are stronger in the long run because , depression can trigger changes in our lives.

To people like that I say the next time they break a leg, they should just snap out of it!

And yes, I think were it not for my struggle with depression, I would probably have much less empathy.

 

[suckaG]

people like that are just ignorant and project themselves and their experiences on others, that's all i can really think of to add. it must be aggrivating.

 

[SophiaGrace]

people like that are just ignorant and project themselves and their experiences on others, that's all i can really think of to add. it must be aggrivating.

It is aggrivating. It makes it a harder place to live for people that're different in any way shape or form.

 

[DesertWolf]

I would never admit to that.

Yeah, the admission that you have no close friends can unfortunately be a deterrent to a lot of people.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I would never admit to that.

Yeah, the admission that you have no close friends can unfortunately be a deterrent to a lot of people.

is it tantamount to me saying "HI! I'm soph, and i have the Bubonic Plague! "

 

[DesertWolf]

I would never admit to that.

Yeah, the admission that you have no close friends can unfortunately be a deterrent to a lot of people.

is it tantamount to me saying "HI! I'm soph, and i have the Bubonic Plague! "

Yeah, that's how a lot of people see it. What they don't realize is that they are the disease and the lonely people are the symptoms.

 

[Ak5]

When I was in Middle School, everyone believed me. Lol

But now, I don't know, since I don't talk to anyone.

 

[FreedomFromLiberty]

This happens to me sometimes. I dont understand why people try to tell me I do when I don't?

I mean, i have one friend and one possible friend at college. but when i try to tell people i have difficulty making friends they act as though it's impossible. I find it weird that they behave like that.

I've never had people NOT believe me. If I even hint at the fact that I have few close friends (or heaven forbid, admit that I'm rarely on FB) then I am almost always just mean with a stunned, uncomfortable silence. I think they can see it on my face that I am not lying. My face tends to express my true, sour emotional state.

 

[Tiina63]

It can be hard generally to admit to being lonely. I read on one site that it is easier to admit to being depressed than it is to being lonely, as somehow it is more 'acceptable' in many peoples eyes. For some reason people often feel uncomfortable if loneliness is mentioned. Admitting to people that you have no friends takes a lot of guts and I admire you for doing it. It wouldn't put me off getting to know someone if they told me they had no friends. I have been there myself.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I am almost always just mean with a stunned, uncomfortable silence.

I get this reaction as well. :/

---

It can be hard generally to admit to being lonely. I read on one site that it is easier to admit to being depressed than it is to being lonely, as somehow it is more 'acceptable' in many peoples eyes. For some reason people often feel uncomfortable if loneliness is mentioned.

Why does it make people uncomfortable you think?

 

[Tiina63]

I'm not sure why people are often made uncomfortable when loneliness is mentioned. There could be many reasons. The most common would be, at least in my opinion, 1. it touches on their own loneliness which they do not want to admit to or face up to, 2. it is a very deep and personal thing to admit to, and some people may not be happy to communcate on a deeper level and would prefer surface contact only, 3.they may see us as being needy and as wanting them to meet our needs when they don't want to, 4. stigma-they may see us to blame for our loneliness, that we have some sort of fault on a personal level, 5. in our society being self sufficent and independent is praised, and our admitting to our loneliness goes against the norms of our society.

 

[Unwanted94]

Yes, I've had it happen many times. When people mention anything about me and relation to friends,I'm like "ha What friends?" No one ever believes me, but what can you do. I think after awhile people will figure it out because they'll notice you never talk about friends or anything.

 

[buttercup87]

4. stigma-they may see us to blame for our loneliness, that we have some sort of fault on a personal level,

I definately agree with this Tina! Like some others have said, I would never admit to being lonely to people at work because i know i would instantly be seen as weird, like it's my own fault that I dont have any close friends nearby. But the majority of us dont ask for it to be this way!!

 

[Tiina63]

Exaclty, Buttercup. Noone would choose to be lonely. (Some people chose to be alone and are happy with it, but this is different.) I only admitted for the first time last year to a friend I have had for many years that I was lonely. Telling others I don't know well would be too hard. I would be afraid that they would see me as weird.

 

[Fvantom]

All the time, most of the people I talk to about it seem to think that anyone I interact with at all is my friend and I shouldnt feel this way -___-