Does Facebook make you feel lonelier?

[Troubadour]

Everytime I log onto fb and see how many likes and comments other people get compared to me for things that aren't even interesting , it just makes me feel horrible. I will post as really good photo and get like four likes and someone else will post that they're hungry and get 20 likes. Do you feel the same?

 

[SophiaGrace]

To be honest, I don't really care about other people's likes. I value my friends that I have on my facebook. People seem to like me well enough.

I understand you are seeking validation...I was just being honest with my perspective on this.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I rarely post on my FB page. I just have it to keep up with some of my friends and family, as well as a few groups I have.
Other people liking what I post isn't a concern of mine. I'm not there for popularity or likes.

That said, it depends on who and how many friends you have for the amount of likes you are going to get. The "yes men" are always going to like things, whereas real people aren't going to like something just because it's right there in front of them. Facebook is what you make it. If you want it to be a popularity contest, it will be. If you want it to stay close to people you know and care about, that's what it will be. Choose what you want it to be and accept it as that, don't expect everyone to like something just because you posted it. Expectations only lead to disappointment.

 

[LonesomeLoner]

It's meaningless in the real world. Try not to let it bother you.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I wouldn't say Facebook makes me feel more lonely, necessarily. A lot of the things that other people do are just "meh" to me, like going to bars or things like that (unless there is a band or it's some kind of niche place, like the ones that have board games). But there's a few people on my Facebook that are actually doing things. One of the people I know is a fighter pilot. A few others race cars. Another owns a business, at least I think he does, and is always going out adventuring to someplace or another, skiing or doing mountain bike trips. Facebook doesn't make me feel lonely, but it does make me feel that I could and should be doing more with myself. I think I would feel that way regardless of Facebook though - it just points out examples to me.

Another thing it does though is just bring out feelings of what I can only describe as "wtf", in the sense of dating. Seeing these really beautiful, fascinating, fun, sweet girls - all taken by *********s. I'm not jealous, I'd never want to be like them. But I think I should be able to get at least as much as them, I think I'm at least as capable, that I have at least as much potential and am worth just as much if not more. I don't understand it. Maybe they feel they don't have any better options or something.

 

[edgecrusher]

Nope. Sometimes what makes me feel more lonely is seeing couples in public. Not those couples that look like they are just going through the motions, but the ones where it seems like they have a real connection.

 

[user 115627]

It used to...until I left. Originally I had joined to reconnect with some folks from school and it served its purpose back then. But in the end I just found myself out of place there. Never really cared about the whole 'like' system. I didn't have many connections in the first place - family, friends and professional life alike - so it wasn't that beneficial or necessary for me anyway.

 

[ABrokenMan]

i have not signed into my account for 2 months, and i do not miss it.
no one seems to have noticed anyway, with hundreds & hundreds of FB "friends" only two of them even noticed and contacted me off-site to find out what is wrong.
What does that suggest?

 

[Tealeaf]

Yes, but it extends beyond the likes system and into the desire to always be calling and texting, wanting to use chat rooms with strangers, etc. We're just not the same kind of creature.

 

[cumulus.james]

I don't use FB but I have definately felt my lonliness amplified since the net came along.

Once upon a time you HAD to talk to your fellow humans. Now you can almost avoid it completely.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Another thing it does though is just bring out feelings of what I can only describe as "wtf", in the sense of dating. Seeing these really beautiful, fascinating, fun, sweet girls - all taken by *********s. I'm not jealous, I'd never want to be like them. But I think I should be able to get at least as much as them, I think I'm at least as capable, that I have at least as much potential and am worth just as much if not more. I don't understand it. Maybe they feel they don't have any better options or something.

*********s = guys you are jealous of ?

I'm not seeing this on my newsfeed at all in terms of couples. :l

 

[TheSkaFish]

Another thing it does though is just bring out feelings of what I can only describe as "wtf", in the sense of dating. Seeing these really beautiful, fascinating, fun, sweet girls - all taken by *********s. I'm not jealous, I'd never want to be like them. But I think I should be able to get at least as much as them, I think I'm at least as capable, that I have at least as much potential and am worth just as much if not more. I don't understand it. Maybe they feel they don't have any better options or something.

*********s = guys you are jealous of ?

I'm not seeing this on my newsfeed at all in terms of couples. :l

No. I said I was not jealous of them in my post. Aside from the specific girls, they have nothing else I want. They are not doing what I want to do, making the things I want to make, and so on. I wouldn't be caught dead acting the way they do, I'd NEVER want that to be me.

I meant *********s as in, they're *********s. Cocky dumb obnoxious pieces of **** that get by on a "rebel" image and/or a too-cool-for-school attitude. Take that away and they've got nothing.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Another thing it does though is just bring out feelings of what I can only describe as "wtf", in the sense of dating. Seeing these really beautiful, fascinating, fun, sweet girls - all taken by *********s. I'm not jealous, I'd never want to be like them. But I think I should be able to get at least as much as them, I think I'm at least as capable, that I have at least as much potential and am worth just as much if not more. I don't understand it. Maybe they feel they don't have any better options or something.

*********s = guys you are jealous of ?

I'm not seeing this on my newsfeed at all in terms of couples. :l

No. I said I was not jealous of them in my post. Aside from the specific girls, they have nothing else I want. They are not doing what I want to do, making the things I want to make, and so on. I wouldn't be caught dead acting the way they do, I'd NEVER want that to be me.

I meant *********s as in, they're *********s. Cocky dumb obnoxious pieces of **** that get by on a "rebel" image and/or a too-cool-for-school attitude. Take that away and they've got nothing.

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't read your post thoroughly enough.

:/

I mean jealous of them because they have girls you'd like to date and that makes you feel frustrated.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Everytime I log onto fb and see how many likes and comments other people get compared to me for things that aren't even interesting , it just makes me feel horrible. I will post as really good photo and get like four likes and someone else will post that they're hungry and get 20 likes. Do you feel the same?

No. I don't really notice how many 'likes' other people get. It doesn't interest me. Every 'like' I get means something though. I mainly post my photo's on there and when people 'like' them it pleases me. Other things I write sometimes don't get noticed but it doesn't bother me.

 

[Mr Seal The Albatros]

No. I don't really notice how many 'likes' other people get. It doesn't interest me. Every 'like' I get means something though. I mainly post my photo's on there and when people 'like' them it pleases me. Other things I write sometimes don't get noticed but it doesn't bother me.

^^Sort of my philosophy for it.

 

[Triple Bogey]

No. I don't really notice how many 'likes' other people get. It doesn't interest me. Every 'like' I get means something though. I mainly post my photo's on there and when people 'like' them it pleases me. Other things I write sometimes don't get noticed but it doesn't bother me.

^^Sort of my philosophy for it.

it's a very convenient way of getting in touch with people. Rather than hunting for an email address for example. And keeping in touch in general. I don't understand people who have account and don't post anything. What is the point ?

Most of what I write is tongue in cheek jokes poking fun out of myself. People 'like' what I do and mention it when I see them. I don't think FB should be taken seriously.

It shouldn't bother anybody because you control what you see. You can delete people who annoy you for example.

 

[TheSkaFish]

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't read your post thoroughly enough.

:/

I mean jealous of them because they have girls you'd like to date and that makes you feel frustrated.

You just may not be "friends" with the kind of people who would date *********s. Not all the couples on mine are like this. Just the girls I'm wanting to date, of course.

But it's okay that you missed that. Yeah, frustrated is exactly how Facebook makes me feel. I don't understand how women that have so much intelligence and depth and individuality and sweetness could fall for guys who are playing the oldest, shallowest, most cliche act in the book. I feel like by my age, 28, I should have a well-developed enough personality and identity that guys with "attitude" shouldn't still be a threat to me. It makes me feel like there is something wrong with me. It makes me feel like I should have been living my life differently this whole time, should be far ahead of where I am now, should have chosen to be someone else a long time ago and now my time has come and gone and I can't catch up. It makes me feel like it's too late for me to get what I want in life, in terms of skills and what I get to do with my life, and obviously, relationships. It makes me feel like I'm just stuck and now all I can do is watch helplessly as all the money, experiences, skills and talents, and relationships I want go to someone else. And that just makes me want to scream until I pass out.

On the other hand, it's too useful to delete though. It's my only way of staying in touch with a lot of people.

 

[blackdot]

People create fake accounts with my email address ever so often. I go in delete the account. The other day someone did it so I decided to look around the site. I found all kids of people I have known in the past from high school to people at work. Sent me into a severely depressed tailspin as I saw they were all married with kids.
Deleted that account again.

 

[SelfDefenseFamily]

That's actually a good question. It's super handy for keeping in touch with people. And if you are an avid music-listener like me, it's also good for staying up to date with the newest releases and/or bands who are playing a show in your area. It's not all that bad but sometimes I do catch myself being jealous towards people who have it better then me. I can't stand how people can post a picture of themselves like everyday. I get it, you are good looking but is that really necessary? Some people have like a severe case of narcissism. When I look how "awesome" peoples lives are it makes me very jealous and angry. My life is utter ****. I tried to delete my profile a couple of times but I just keep coming back for some reason.

 

[Peaches]

Yes, some days it almost gets me, all these people with perfect lives, bunches of them are married to these perfect guys with perfect children,, they publish books and release CDs and are acclaimed both personally and professionally, the climax was some time ago when one of my "friends" (whom I barely know) posted pictures of her and her team at a meeting with joe biden and obama who approved of their project (!), if I start comparing myself to them two guns are not enough to shoot myself, I'd need a cannon or something.
Also, you never know what is really happening on the other side of those happy pictures, a couple of times someone wrote that they were jealous of me! (extremely misguided, considering that my life is mostly pain in many senses).
So, you never know.