Orsino
Member
- Joined
- Jan 27, 2009
- Messages
- 14
- Reaction score
- 0
Hi, I’m a 25 year old male University student from the north of England. I’m new to this whole forum thing and pretty useless with technology as well so please bear with me. I have lurked for a while and written this post about a 100 times in word but never had the courage to post it, however things just seem to going downhill at the moment and it seems a right time for a self indulgent rant. It started when I was in my late teens, I just gradually lost all my friends since we had started to differ in lifestyles; they just wanted and endeavored for the party of Polaroid friends, to go out every night and smoke, drink and do drugs and that’s just not my idea of fun.
I got diagnosed with epilepsy two years ago with OCD which made the situation even worse and because of the medication I’m on I don’t sleep and become irritable and spend most of my night reading, listening to music, attempting to play the piano and watching re-runs of Marx Brother movies or French new wave films.
I have just eventually become so frustrated and bitter with everyone at my University, they way they make it look so easy to make friends and click with people, I feel like a child or that they must be something wrong with me mentally or physically and when I do, I get worried that I’m coming on too strong or that I’m acting desperate.
I have had girlfriends just not healthy relationships with them, the last one I had I broke up with just before Christmas, partly because she resented me because she didn’t understand why I felt the way that I do (Like I do?) and partly because to be honest I ended up making her feel more empty and miserable than I was, and breaking up was my gift to her. I spent Christmas and my Birthday alone because of this.
I Guess I’m on here because I’m just looking for people like me, I’m feeling and becoming more comfortable with myself, it would just be nice to talk to like minded people.
I’m sorry for the rant and hope I fit in here, (tell me if I don’t) although I will need some help to come out a bit more, as I’m shaking while writing this (very introverted!) and me and technology don’t get along.
Thanks for reading and I'm always available so drop me a line.
Orsino
P.s. sorry for the grammar, been writing papers all day
I got diagnosed with epilepsy two years ago with OCD which made the situation even worse and because of the medication I’m on I don’t sleep and become irritable and spend most of my night reading, listening to music, attempting to play the piano and watching re-runs of Marx Brother movies or French new wave films.
I have just eventually become so frustrated and bitter with everyone at my University, they way they make it look so easy to make friends and click with people, I feel like a child or that they must be something wrong with me mentally or physically and when I do, I get worried that I’m coming on too strong or that I’m acting desperate.
I have had girlfriends just not healthy relationships with them, the last one I had I broke up with just before Christmas, partly because she resented me because she didn’t understand why I felt the way that I do (Like I do?) and partly because to be honest I ended up making her feel more empty and miserable than I was, and breaking up was my gift to her. I spent Christmas and my Birthday alone because of this.
I Guess I’m on here because I’m just looking for people like me, I’m feeling and becoming more comfortable with myself, it would just be nice to talk to like minded people.
I’m sorry for the rant and hope I fit in here, (tell me if I don’t) although I will need some help to come out a bit more, as I’m shaking while writing this (very introverted!) and me and technology don’t get along.
Thanks for reading and I'm always available so drop me a line.
Orsino
P.s. sorry for the grammar, been writing papers all day
