subs728
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- Oct 30, 2011
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hello everyone
My name is subs, and I thought I'd just introduced my self. Well I came across this site on Google, actually what I was thinking of is starting a blog about life, mine, in the lonely lane. I guess my take at the moment on loneliness is that most (myself included) do not understand what it truly means to be alone and some of it's effects.
I have been on my own now for two years, no relationships, friends, family and lovers. I have days and weeks when I am on lock down and I just lock myself in my house all alone, but for the most part I have to go to work and deal with people, but at this point or lately I am so very aware of how disconnected I am from them, I am not like them, I am completely on my own and I am aware of it in ways that are not usual but okay.
I have many gadgets to entertain me at my place, and I have enjoyed them thoroughly, but it is now abundantly clear that all these are mere distractions as meaningless and eventually unentertaining as the friends and families and lovers that most (not all) have. At this point I have given in to the loneliness completely, at least for now, it is what is real and what helps makes sense of life for me, me and my thoughts are my sanctuary.
I have my days of depression, days when I doubt what I am I doing, days when I question the one thing in my life I value the most - my sanity, days when my mind turns against me and taunts me in the cruelest ways. You can call me crazy, a loner, a social misfit, a weirdo, I am cool with that, not all of us choose the easy road of conforming to the expectations of the modern culture - I seek what is true and right and real even on my crappiest day. Truth is not always pretty.
So in a nutshell that is me, alone as the man in the moon but still the indistinguishable face of a real person you walked past last week. Part of it all but fighting to break away from it all and be free to find the truth.
“All persons ought to endeavor to follow what is right, and not what is established.”
― Aristotle
My name is subs, and I thought I'd just introduced my self. Well I came across this site on Google, actually what I was thinking of is starting a blog about life, mine, in the lonely lane. I guess my take at the moment on loneliness is that most (myself included) do not understand what it truly means to be alone and some of it's effects.
I have been on my own now for two years, no relationships, friends, family and lovers. I have days and weeks when I am on lock down and I just lock myself in my house all alone, but for the most part I have to go to work and deal with people, but at this point or lately I am so very aware of how disconnected I am from them, I am not like them, I am completely on my own and I am aware of it in ways that are not usual but okay.
I have many gadgets to entertain me at my place, and I have enjoyed them thoroughly, but it is now abundantly clear that all these are mere distractions as meaningless and eventually unentertaining as the friends and families and lovers that most (not all) have. At this point I have given in to the loneliness completely, at least for now, it is what is real and what helps makes sense of life for me, me and my thoughts are my sanctuary.
I have my days of depression, days when I doubt what I am I doing, days when I question the one thing in my life I value the most - my sanity, days when my mind turns against me and taunts me in the cruelest ways. You can call me crazy, a loner, a social misfit, a weirdo, I am cool with that, not all of us choose the easy road of conforming to the expectations of the modern culture - I seek what is true and right and real even on my crappiest day. Truth is not always pretty.
So in a nutshell that is me, alone as the man in the moon but still the indistinguishable face of a real person you walked past last week. Part of it all but fighting to break away from it all and be free to find the truth.
“All persons ought to endeavor to follow what is right, and not what is established.”
― Aristotle
. So will I be starting the blog or starting something here? I am not quiet sure right now. But generally I tend to share the things that really matter to me and I think to most of us, especial the thoughts and aspects of us that we rather not look at. I don't know call me arrogant, with little regard for forced politeness, small talk, meaningless exchanges, distractions...distractions from the elephant in the room - the apparent meaningless of life. 
