Hesitation

[TheSolitaryMan]

I don't think it's a ploy by her LC, unfortunately

I'm truly happy with getting closer to her if it was all straightforward (her being single and so on). I have no fears there at all, I'm comfortable around her if anything.

It's just like when a girl is missing stuff that is really essential to her degree, it makes me wonder if it's appropriate for me to do so.

She said to me a week ago "See you tomorrow", then vanished for the whole week, missing all the work we did and everything. No one knows what's up, but it's clearly interfering with her and not making her happy.

So I just don't want to be a gardenia and exploit her feelings if she's feeling insecure at all, you know?

I want her to be able to rely on me as a friend/potential BF to help her out and make her happy, not contribute to her problems.

Sorry if I'm rambling, but I hope that makes my situation clear.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Maybe she just got sick from a flu...
I got sick 3,-4 days last week.

1000 forms of fear...
Yourr still froming a place of fears.
You perceived everything through tint of fesrs.
Everything you had written hss fears written all over it.

Maybe PM Hijacc....he might be able to help you.
He had simular experiences...before he finally just kissed the girl.
He overcame is fesrs.

[/u]

---

Im THAI....
Therez big ass statues of demons or devilish figure in
Display in public or moitsries...
As a child they scared the living be jesus out of me.
Id run like hell or aviod them....

I didnt under why in the hell they did that.
Not unti later on in life unti i did a little bit of research...

Those demonic looking statues is put in place to remind
People to face their fesrs. Expose themselves to their fears...
Not go around it or run from it.

 

[passage]

lol, this reads like my first relationship. I can't really offer any advice, but I will suggest that you don't get offended if you get friend zoned. Try to learn from your mistakes, and don't forget to be a man. And finally, remember that most cute girls don't stay single for long, so just kiss her ffs!

 

[jjam]

lol, this reads like my first relationship. I can't really offer any advice, but I will suggest that you don't get offended if you get friend zoned. Try to learn from your mistakes, and don't forget to be a man. And finally, remember that most cute girls don't stay single for long, so just kiss her ffs!

I'd like to think that people who have had a bad string of relationships, yet remain interested in finding someone they can spend the rest of their lives with, eventually learn not to be so hasty about jumping into relationships.

If I meet a woman who makes me FEEL like we have a chance, I will give that feeling a chance by giving us time to grow closer and get to know each other. If she is for me, it will happen. If she isn't, she'll find that other guy and I can move on. I'd advise men and women looking for something real to not be hasty. You see someone you think has potential? Give them time. Give yourself time. The truth will be unveiled soon enough.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

lol, this reads like my first relationship. I can't really offer any advice, but I will suggest that you don't get offended if you get friend zoned. Try to learn from your mistakes, and don't forget to be a man. And finally, remember that most cute girls don't stay single for long, so just kiss her ffs!

I'd like to think that people who have had a bad string of relationships, yet remain interested in finding someone they can spend the rest of their lives with, eventually learn not to be so hasty about jumping into relationships.

If I meet a woman who makes me FEEL like we have a chance, I will give that feeling a chance by giving us time to grow closer and get to know each other. If she is for me, it will happen. If she isn't, she'll find that other guy and I can move on. I'd advise men and women looking for something real to not be hasty. You see someone you think has potential? Give them time. Give yourself time. The truth will be unveiled soon enough.

I know everyone is different...even though Ive been in relationships
all my life.
THE BIGGEST REASON why I ended up where I was and found this
site is REGRET. It hitted me like a ton of bricks and sent me into
a sypro or tail spin.

Jenni....Jenni was pateint with me for over two years.
I even took those suggestions of taking a break between
relationships. She repected me and gave me that too.
She even had to ask me to dinner twices.
It wasnt so much about that I havnt kissed a girl yet.
It was becuase I wanted everything to be perfect between
us. I wanted things to be perfect.
We were beyound the friends or dating.
The woman asked me straigth up if I love her.
Not so much that she didnt know I had feelings for her, I did.
Lots and lots of love poams and heart to heart talks.
She wanted a life long partner and commitment.
She was healthy, young, beautiful, prefessional woman.
She wasnt perfect...her good qualities out wieght her bads
by 9 to 1.
Most men would die just to have a chance with her
but she wanted me...She saw a lot of good in me.
I hastitated....I messed around and messed around.
She DIED......
Nothing...absolutley nothing was right after that.

When Renae came back into my life...right, wrong or indifference..
I didnt want to regret ever letting Renae knows how much I love her.
I didnt hastitate falling in love with her.
I dont reget Loving Renae with every part of me.
I dont reget the good times or bad times we have.
I'm grateful for all her love for me.
I'm grateful for every breath she shares with me.

I took life for granted....

 

[jjam]

That's unfortunate, LC. Nevertheless, that's an extraordinary circumstance.

I'm not claiming to be an expert on such matters. I'm just speaking from where I'm at and where I want to be with regards to a lifelong love relationship. Taking time is very important to me. If I am showing a woman interest, showing her that I want to build with her and grow a meaningful relationship with her, showing that I want her to take time to reach that point of KNOWING and embracing the truth of what she feels for me (and I her) just for her to one day decide that I'm moving too slowly and that she should give some other guy a try, well... that just tells me she didn't want to give us a chance the way I wanted to give us a chance. In other words, she wasn't for me.

I feel there should be a preliminary phase to love relationships that a lot of people are missing out on due to an absurd level of impatience. And that is why stuff isn't working out with so many people. That's why there are so many divorces, so many hit & runs, so many single mothers and fathers (or those parents who are not with the ones they called themselves making love to create their children), so many people with trust issues and fears about love, so many people not even knowing what love is about. People are skipping steps only to fall and hurt themselves.

Yes, life is flying by. But I guess it comes down to how you want things to be for yourself. I don't want short term, and I feel like I've put myself through some decades of boot camp to avoid being a father who is not with the woman I made love to which lead to my child's birth. Or the divorced husband after YEARS of struggle trying to make it work. There won't be a struggle when she and I are ready, just bliss. The hard times won't be a mystery or a threat. They'll be a hard day at work, a tough workout session, a brief series of bad luck. That's a piece of where the preliminary phase will pay off.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

People died everyday. It's not that extraordinary....
It's life on Life's terms. Heart breaking as it may be.

Other times our love ones or ourselves fall to various illness..such as cancer, countless other illness or injuries.
All these things can ulter and effect a relationship and whatever plans we made set out to do.

Over and over again were reminded to live life to the fullest.
Each day and everyday, Oneday at a time, Live in the moment not our heads....
For reasons.

Of course we all want the best possible outcome and not throw causion in the wind.
But we should never lose site that today is all we have and all we're ever going to have and not miss the boat.

The Journey to Renae's heart hasnt been easy.
The road has many twist and turns. Many mountains to claimb.
Many valleys and dark narrow path. I've given up everything.
I drove thousands upon thousand of miles. Many sleepless nights.
Many, many tears. Many places I've never seen. Many storms.
Many sunsets and sunriase without her. Many friends and enemies
along the way.
At the sametime there were many luaghters, good times,
lots of romance, lots of love, lots of sex, lots of dancing.
The list gose on and on. I lived it. I took in every breath of it.
It's not over yet. She loves me. As imperfect as she may be.
She loves me. I love her. I'm far from perfect.
I can breathe again.

 

[jjam]

Firstly, taking time to cultivate a love relationship is no less of "living in the moment" than skipping steps or taking on a love couple title with haste.

Secondly, yes, of course, people die everyday. I wasn't saying that death in itself is an extraordinary circumstance when applied to life forms of this world. I was saying the circumstance of one of two people working towards a love relationship who is not close to death of old age, in war, or faced with known health issues that would justify a doctor's warning suddenly dying is extraordinary.