I need to call something out...

[ewomack]

I need to call something out because when people don't call something out nothing ever changes.

Not too long ago I left an admittedly long post about some things that I went through while growing up around sexuality and bullying. Yes, it was long, but it also dealt with things that deeply affected me, things I went to therapy about and things that had a pretty intense, and negative, influence on my life. I shared these things because I've found a mostly supportive environment on this forum.

Not long after, @Adamridge79 left this response. Yes, he didn't reference my post specifically, but it was pretty obvious.



I responded because I found it a complete over-reaction from someone I didn't even know. I had never had a single interaction with @Adamridge79 before. It was an attack completely out of the blue.

So, I reacted in kind to him on another thread. He deserved it. I thought that maybe he would listen if I stooped to his level. Wrong. Oh well.

That alone wouldn't have bothered me much. What bothered me more was two pretty established people on this forum, @Colster and @Finished giving it a thumbs up. That shocked and bothered me far more than the original post, because my understanding was that these people were also here to talk about personal issues, receive support and support others. The original post represents the antithesis of support, but they openly gave it credibility.

I decided to let it rest, I took a break for a while and I thought, well, perhaps people have had their "fun" and we can get back to some semblance of "normalcy" here.

Then, just yesterday, I left a much shorter post about more things that screwed me up, messed with my relationships and were sources of pretty deep sadness for me.

Right after this post. @Adamridge79 struck again:



Not only did @Colster and @Finished support him again, this one even received a laugh reaction! So I share painful stuff from my life, someone makes fun of it, and then other people laugh at it. Okay, then.

I'm not doing this for my benefit, at this point I couldn't care less what any of these 3 think about me. I'm doing it for the benefit of someone else who comes here and airs some problems and looks for support and instead gets made fun of and becomes the butt of a joke. This is junior high crap. You people could really do some damage with this, especially on a forum that touts itself as a place to come to for support. You haven't supported me, you've done the opposite, you've technically tried to bully and humiliate me, for what purpose I can't guess.

I still enjoy the posts and discussion of many people here, so I'm not going to leave, but I am going to put @Colster, @Finished and @Adamridge79 on ignore because I can't honestly see having a decent relationship with any of them here at this point. Even the biggest jerks I've run into on other forums never attacked my personal posts, so I fear what you will do to others.

If you can't stop and you're here more for entertainment or making fun of others, then please leave for the benefit of this forum.

 

[Finished]

I liked what he said because both posts were unnecessarily long IMO. I wouldn't have said anything. But, since you are concerned about it, I honestly I don't like to read posts that long. I don't like to read books for the same reason. It doesn't mean you shouldn't do it or it's wrong. It just means I agree that the posts were long IMO. I think I also agreed to your post about how you should be able to write what you want or something to that effect. But, I could be wrong and I'm not going to go searching for it. After the second time I liked what he said and I saw your reaction and another members reaction, I figured that was enough I would just ignore it after that. At this point I'll still ignore it because I don't feel I need to like it any more. IMO, no big deal. Time to move on.

 

[Abstamyous]

I'm sorry for your experience, ewomack. I really appreciate your input around the forum and I hope that it remains.

 

[Colster]

I need to call something out because when people don't call something out nothing ever changes.

Not too long ago I left an admittedly long post about some things that I went through while growing up around sexuality and bullying. Yes, it was long, but it also dealt with things that deeply affected me, things I went to therapy about and things that had a pretty intense, and negative, influence on my life. I shared these things because I've found a mostly supportive environment on this forum.

Not long after, @Adamridge79 left this response. Yes, he didn't reference my post specifically, but it was pretty obvious.

View attachment 4409

I responded because I found it a complete over-reaction from someone I didn't even know. I had never had a single interaction with @Adamridge79 before. It was an attack completely out of the blue.

So, I reacted in kind to him on another thread. He deserved it. I thought that maybe he would listen if I stooped to his level. Wrong. Oh well.

That alone wouldn't have bothered me much. What bothered me more was two pretty established people on this forum, @Colster and @Finished giving it a thumbs up. That shocked and bothered me far more than the original post, because my understanding was that these people were also here to talk about personal issues, receive support and support others. The original post represents the antithesis of support, but they openly gave it credibility.

I decided to let it rest, I took a break for a while and I thought, well, perhaps people have had their "fun" and we can get back to some semblance of "normalcy" here.

Then, just yesterday, I left a much shorter post about more things that screwed me up, messed with my relationships and were sources of pretty deep sadness for me.

Right after this post. @Adamridge79 struck again:

View attachment 4410

Not only did @Colster and @Finished support him again, this one even received a laugh reaction! So I share painful stuff from my life, someone makes fun of it, and then other people laugh at it. Okay, then.

I'm not doing this for my benefit, at this point I couldn't care less what any of these 3 think about me. I'm doing it for the benefit of someone else who comes here and airs some problems and looks for support and instead gets made fun of and becomes the butt of a joke. This is junior high crap. You people could really do some damage with this, especially on a forum that touts itself as a place to come to for support. You haven't supported me, you've done the opposite, you've technically tried to bully and humiliate me, for what purpose I can't guess.

I still enjoy the posts and discussion of many people here, so I'm not going to leave, but I am going to put @Colster, @Finished and @Adamridge79 on ignore because I can't honestly see having a decent relationship with any of them here at this point. Even the biggest jerks I've run into on other forums never attacked my personal posts, so I fear what you will do to others.

If you can't stop and you're here more for entertainment or making fun of others, then please leave for the benefit of this forum.

Right, when you have finished with your self pittying gloat, and bother to research into the facts. You will note that we encourage debates from all angles. And provided it isn't abusive, all opinions are valid. Likewise, we will often leave some indication that we are following the thread. Seeing as there are only a few icons available, a "Like" does not necessarily mean that we like everything therin. But unlike others, we don't do the righteous indignation or passive aggressive malarkey.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I honestly I don't like to read posts that long.

Where does it say you are required to read anything you don't want to read?

I'll be honest and say I'm not a fan of this thread (I wouldn't be surprised if it gets locked), because I don't feel this is the way to go about it as it usually just causes more problems, but I do agree with what ewomack said. I don't always read his posts if they are lengthy, but I do like his detailed posts because they are usually quite expressive and helpful. And at least they are courteous and well formatted, making them easier to read, regardless of the length.

 

[Pineytrees]

I need to call something out because when people don't call something out nothing ever changes.

Not too long ago I left an admittedly long post about some things that I went through while growing up around sexuality and bullying. Yes, it was long, but it also dealt with things that deeply affected me, things I went to therapy about and things that had a pretty intense, and negative, influence on my life. I shared these things because I've found a mostly supportive environment on this forum.

Not long after, @Adamridge79 left this response. Yes, he didn't reference my post specifically, but it was pretty obvious.

View attachment 4409

I responded because I found it a complete over-reaction from someone I didn't even know. I had never had a single interaction with @Adamridge79 before. It was an attack completely out of the blue.

So, I reacted in kind to him on another thread. He deserved it. I thought that maybe he would listen if I stooped to his level. Wrong. Oh well.

That alone wouldn't have bothered me much. What bothered me more was two pretty established people on this forum, @Colster and @Finished giving it a thumbs up. That shocked and bothered me far more than the original post, because my understanding was that these people were also here to talk about personal issues, receive support and support others. The original post represents the antithesis of support, but they openly gave it credibility.

I decided to let it rest, I took a break for a while and I thought, well, perhaps people have had their "fun" and we can get back to some semblance of "normalcy" here.

Then, just yesterday, I left a much shorter post about more things that screwed me up, messed with my relationships and were sources of pretty deep sadness for me.

Right after this post. @Adamridge79 struck again:

View attachment 4410

Not only did @Colster and @Finished support him again, this one even received a laugh reaction! So I share painful stuff from my life, someone makes fun of it, and then other people laugh at it. Okay, then.

I'm not doing this for my benefit, at this point I couldn't care less what any of these 3 think about me. I'm doing it for the benefit of someone else who comes here and airs some problems and looks for support and instead gets made fun of and becomes the butt of a joke. This is junior high crap. You people could really do some damage with this, especially on a forum that touts itself as a place to come to for support. You haven't supported me, you've done the opposite, you've technically tried to bully and humiliate me, for what purpose I can't guess.

I still enjoy the posts and discussion of many people here, so I'm not going to leave, but I am going to put @Colster, @Finished and @Adamridge79 on ignore because I can't honestly see having a decent relationship with any of them here at this point. Even the biggest jerks I've run into on other forums never attacked my personal posts, so I fear what you will do to others.

If you can't stop and you're here more for entertainment or making fun of others, then please leave for the benefit of this forum.

Keep on writing whatever you want. Who cares about what they do and don’t like.

 

[Colster]

To establish a character defamation case, you must show:

1. The statement was not substantially true
2. You can identify who made the false statement
3. The person knowingly or recklessly made a false statement
4. The statement was published (verbally or in writing) to someone other than you
5. The false statement harmed you

I'm not doing this for my benefit, at this point I couldn't care less what any of these 3 think about me. I'm doing it for the benefit of someone else who comes here and airs some problems and looks for support and instead gets made fun of and becomes the butt of a joke. This is junior high crap. You people could really do some damage with this, especially on a forum that touts itself as a place to come to for support. You haven't supported me, you've done the opposite, you've technically tried to bully and humiliate me, for what purpose I can't guess.

I still enjoy the posts and discussion of many people here, so I'm not going to leave, but I am going to put @Colster, @Finished and @Adamridge79 on ignore because I can't honestly see having a decent relationship with any of them here at this point. Even the biggest jerks I've run into on other forums never attacked my personal posts, so I fear what you will do to others.

 

[Finished]

Where does it say you are required to read anything you don't want to read?

I'll be honest and say I'm not a fan of this thread (I wouldn't be surprised if it gets locked), because I don't feel this is the way to go about it as it usually just causes more problems, but I do agree with what ewomack said. I don't always read his posts if they are lengthy, but I do like his detailed posts because they are usually quite expressive and helpful. And at least they are courteous and well formatted, making them easier to read, regardless of the length.

No where. I never said that I was required to do that. You are the fact checker around here. Don't put words in someone else's mouth. You are trying to stir a pot that you already know can become ugly. So, there's no reason to say anything other then you agree that his posts are fine and that you enjoy reading them. That's how you keep things positive.

I explained why I did what I did. I personally do not like to read long posts. That's just me. No big deal. By the way I also don't like too much rain or too much sun. That doesn't mean that I don't like the rain or the sun. I like and have LIKED many of his posts. Does that mean that I was against what someone else stated? No, it doesn't. It just means that I liked or acknowledge that particular post. Again, no big deal.

 

[Finished]

Wow!

 

[Colster]

slander
[ˈslɑːndə]

NOUN
law

1. the action or crime of making a false spoken statement damaging to a person's reputation.Compare with libel.
   "he is suing the TV company for slander"

VERB

1. make false and damaging statements about (someone).
   "they were accused of slandering the head of state"
   
   
   Not only did @Colster and @Finished support him again, this one even received a laugh reaction! So I share painful stuff from my life, someone makes fun of it, and then other people laugh at it. Okay, then.
   
   
   

 

[TheRealCallie]

Don't put words in someone else's mouth.

I didn't....

I liked what he said because both posts were unnecessarily long IMO. I wouldn't have said anything. But, since you are concerned about it, I honestly I don't like to read posts that long.

To which I said no one is requiring you to read them, which last I checked, is true. Don't like it because it's long, don't read it. It's not really that hard. You don't HAVE to read what anyone writes, including me. So yeah, I didn't put **** in your mouth. I was sharing MY opinion, just like you did.

 

[Finished]

Apparently these three people don't think I should post what I like or don't like? Or, maybe they are just agreeing that they aren't a fan of this thread either. See how easy it is to read more into a stupid thumbs up then there really is.

Okay, everybody, don't thumbs up anything or you'll be attacked!!!

 

[TheRealCallie]

Well, I didn't like anything and you have no problem attacking me, so.....

 

[Finished]

I didn't....




To which I said no one is requiring you to read them, which last I checked, is true. Don't like it because it's long, don't read it. It's not really that hard. You don't HAVE to read what anyone writes, including me. So yeah, I didn't put **** in your mouth. I was sharing MY opinion, just like you did.

Callie, you are the one that attacks people and then you accuse them of attacking you. Not me. Why do you do this kind of **** anyway? Do you really enjoy causing trouble? I know that's what you are good at doing. But, why don't you try being nice. Are you really that miserable?

 

[Finished]

I need to call something out because when people don't call something out nothing ever changes.

Not too long ago I left an admittedly long post about some things that I went through while growing up around sexuality and bullying. Yes, it was long, but it also dealt with things that deeply affected me, things I went to therapy about and things that had a pretty intense, and negative, influence on my life. I shared these things because I've found a mostly supportive environment on this forum.

Not long after, @Adamridge79 left this response. Yes, he didn't reference my post specifically, but it was pretty obvious.

View attachment 4409

I responded because I found it a complete over-reaction from someone I didn't even know. I had never had a single interaction with @Adamridge79 before. It was an attack completely out of the blue.

So, I reacted in kind to him on another thread. He deserved it. I thought that maybe he would listen if I stooped to his level. Wrong. Oh well.

That alone wouldn't have bothered me much. What bothered me more was two pretty established people on this forum, @Colster and @Finished giving it a thumbs up. That shocked and bothered me far more than the original post, because my understanding was that these people were also here to talk about personal issues, receive support and support others. The original post represents the antithesis of support, but they openly gave it credibility.

I decided to let it rest, I took a break for a while and I thought, well, perhaps people have had their "fun" and we can get back to some semblance of "normalcy" here.

Then, just yesterday, I left a much shorter post about more things that screwed me up, messed with my relationships and were sources of pretty deep sadness for me.

Right after this post. @Adamridge79 struck again:

View attachment 4410

Not only did @Colster and @Finished support him again, this one even received a laugh reaction! So I share painful stuff from my life, someone makes fun of it, and then other people laugh at it. Okay, then.

I'm not doing this for my benefit, at this point I couldn't care less what any of these 3 think about me. I'm doing it for the benefit of someone else who comes here and airs some problems and looks for support and instead gets made fun of and becomes the butt of a joke. This is junior high crap. You people could really do some damage with this, especially on a forum that touts itself as a place to come to for support. You haven't supported me, you've done the opposite, you've technically tried to bully and humiliate me, for what purpose I can't guess.

I still enjoy the posts and discussion of many people here, so I'm not going to leave, but I am going to put @Colster, @Finished and @Adamridge79 on ignore because I can't honestly see having a decent relationship with any of them here at this point. Even the biggest jerks I've run into on other forums never attacked my personal posts, so I fear what you will do to others.

If you can't stop and you're here more for entertainment or making fun of others, then please leave for the benefit of this forum.

Good work! You've really helped this website today! Keep it up!

 

[Finished]

Maybe we should post all the thumbs up that all the users have posted and then we can discus them to see if they should have been smiles or frowns instead. Then you'll tell the users that their opinion doesn't matter and change their thumbs up to something that is more pleasing to everybody.

 

[Finished]

Not too long ago I left an admittedly long post about .....

Did you guys even read what he wrote? I bet you didn't. He even admits his post was long. That's all there is to it. What the hell is wrong with you people?

 

[user 135671]

Did you guys even read what he wrote? I bet you didn't. He even admits his post was long. That's all there is to it. What the hell is wrong with you people?

Since it's obviously causing you some distress here is the reason I liked Callie's post

I'll be honest and say I'm not a fan of this thread (I wouldn't be surprised if it gets locked), because I don't feel this is the way to go about it as it usually just causes more problems,

 

[Finished]

Since it's obviously causing you some distress here is the reason I liked Callie's post

No distress about that. Just pointing out how easy it is to read more into a stupid thumbs up then is neccesary.

 

[user 148069]

View attachment 4414

Apparently these three people don't think I should post what I like or don't like? Or, maybe they are just agreeing that they aren't a fan of this thread either. See how easy it is to read more into a stupid thumbs up then there really is.

Okay, everybody, don't thumbs up anything or you'll be attacked!!!

For some, the thumbs up button is sort of an endorsement, that you agree to their thoughts. So yeah in this case I could see how Evo would have seen that to be invalidating especially since he has shared very personal aspects of his life? But that doesn't mean I agree with public callouts. I try not to give the thumbs up indiscriminately. But I also agree with you that it can be easy to fall into the trap of reading more into likes and thumbs up. I've seen this a lot on social media.

edit: running on 2 hours sleeps recently and my brain is only half functioning so I apologize if I offended anyone unintentionally.