****! I think I found someone!

[SophiaGrace]

She found him attractive, not you. You can't really criticize her for that, as I doubt you would want to be involved with someone you weren't attracted to.

Sometimes I think 'bad behaviour' is interpreted as good if the guy's desirable and has charisma, which is a shame, but who are we to criticise, right?

You know, guys...

It hurts my feelings when you judge women based on their gender, it feels like an attack on part of my identity I have no control over. I've not done anything wrong and you assume things about me because I'm a woman.


:/ That hurts.

Wait, what?
Im no fan of a lot of the comments I see here at times, but saying that TB and Ardour are suggesting you personally did something wrong or are assuming anything about you as a person (because of your sex) doesn't make much sense to me (in the context of this thread and in general).
I feel their comments are...well, a bit tactless to be honest, but I'm not sure they were attacking the female gender in this case.

I felt like they were perpetuating the whole "girls like bad boys" mindset.

I can see why you'd feel that way, of course, Soph. I just meant that I didn't think they were aiming their remarks at you personally (based on your comment, "I've not done anything wrong and you assume things about me because I'm a woman.").

Eve, this is my perspective...sometimes it doesn't have to be said in the sense of "Soph, you're a girl, therefore you like bad boys." It doesn't have to be direct. If they keep saying it about other women and I already know that they feel this way about women in general...then it automatically applies to me as well.

I'm just hurt.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Eve, this is my perspective...sometimes it doesn't have to be said in the sense of "Soph, you're a girl, therefore you like bad boys." It doesn't have to be direct. If they keep saying it about other women and I already know that they feel this way about women in general...then it automatically applies to me as well.

I'm just hurt.

I see where you're coming from, Sophia. I'm sorry it's hurtful for you. :\

I think also that for a lot of people when they go through a lot of bad things in life, they tend to generalise those things that caused them hurt or pain... it shouldn't be this way.. but that's what most humans do, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. It's not fair though. Like everything else in this world.

 

[Triple Bogey]

I think bitter feelings and thoughts are natural for somebody like me regarding women.
Considering how I have been treated over the years. What do people expect ?
Anybody else would. Only people in my situation have a clue what's it's like.

I'm not a bitter person in the real world though. I just come on here to have a moan.

 

[Hawx79]

She isn't worth knowing. Sounds like you dodged a bullet there. You saved yourself from tons of **** you don't need in your life.

But you can't give up on women just because of her attitude. Loads of nice women out there !

I know what you mean but I feel it would all be worth it as the life I lead now has become so lonesome and meaningless. For years I have lived the life of a simple free single do whatever you want lifestyle, but now im at the point that its all becoming too much to bare!
It feels as if I tasted the heaviest drug on the planet the day that she showed me such tenderness on the first date. And im willing to put my fortune to get it. It may seem im out of control but I am not.
Its something I really want to make it my first priority in life.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I think bitter feelings and thoughts are natural for somebody like me regarding women.
Considering how I have been treated over the years. What do people expect ?
Anybody else would. Only people in my situation have a clue what's it's like.

I'm not a bitter person in the real world though. I just come on here to have a moan.

I wouldn't expect one to continue to punish themselves by being bitter. It's a personal preference, but seemingly being bitter about anything throughout your life doesn't change or help the situation. I have many things I could hold grudges against, but I just don't see how holding them would help me. It's done and over with.

 

[ardour]

Eve, this is my perspective...sometimes it doesn't have to be said in the sense of "Soph, you're a girl, therefore you like bad boys." It doesn't have to be direct. If they keep saying it about other women and I already know that they feel this way about women in general...then it automatically applies to me as well.

I'm just hurt.

Why would our opinions matter to you? We're alone and have little influence over those around us, and certainly none over society as a whole.

 

[Triple Bogey]

She isn't worth knowing. Sounds like you dodged a bullet there. You saved yourself from tons of **** you don't need in your life.

But you can't give up on women just because of her attitude. Loads of nice women out there !

I know what you mean but I feel it would all be worth it as the life I lead now has become so lonesome and meaningless. For years I have lived the life of a simple free single do whatever you want lifestyle, but now im at the point that its all becoming too much to bare!
It feels as if I tasted the heaviest drug on the planet the day that she showed me such tenderness on the first date. And im willing to put my fortune to get it. It may seem im out of control but I am not.
Its something I really want to make it my first priority in life.

I know how you feel. I have only been on half a dozen dates in my life. All felt special, that feeling of someone wanting to be with me.

I did make the mistake of dragging it out when it was obvious the woman was no longer interested though.

I hope you meet another woman soon !

---

I think bitter feelings and thoughts are natural for somebody like me regarding women.
Considering how I have been treated over the years. What do people expect ?
Anybody else would. Only people in my situation have a clue what's it's like.

I'm not a bitter person in the real world though. I just come on here to have a moan.

I wouldn't expect one to continue to punish themselves by being bitter. It's a personal preference, but seemingly being bitter about anything throughout your life doesn't change or help the situation. I have many things I could hold grudges against, but I just don't see how holding them would help me. It's done and over with.

You'll be surprized how bitter some people are, obsessing over some incident years ago.

---

This reminds of this lass I asked out over 10 years ago. I asked her twice and she very rude about it. A few years later she apparently went to this house party and 'got off with' some bloke who was there. She decided in a few minutes that she wanted to be involved with him. I wasn't good enough yet she decides in a moment this other guy is. Why was he so desirable compared to me ? It's ***** and I have loads of situations similar. Complete ******s getting the girl instead of me. Blokes who cheat, are rude, have no manners, do drugs. It's not fair but I honestly don't give a **** anymore. Their loss.

She found him attractive, not you. You can't really criticize her for that, as I doubt you would want to be involved with someone you weren't attracted to.

Sometimes I think 'bad behaviour' is interpreted as good if the guy's desirable and has charisma, which is a shame, but who are we to criticise, right?

I don't think he was a bad lad, in fact what I heard he was a nice fella. I know it didn't last. My point was she liked him because of his looks, nothing else. Looking back I am glad she wasn't interested because she isn't a nice person.

---

This reminds of this lass I asked out over 10 years ago. I asked her twice and she very rude about it. A few years later she apparently went to this house party and 'got off with' some bloke who was there. She decided in a few minutes that she wanted to be involved with him. I wasn't good enough yet she decides in a moment this other guy is. Why was he so desirable compared to me ? It's ***** and I have loads of situations similar. Complete ******s getting the girl instead of me. Blokes who cheat, are rude, have no manners, do drugs. It's not fair but I honestly don't give a **** anymore. Their loss.

She found him attractive, not you. You can't really criticize her for that, as I doubt you would want to be involved with someone you weren't attracted to.

Sometimes I think 'bad behaviour' is interpreted as good if the guy's desirable and has charisma, which is a shame, but who are we to criticise, right?

You know, guys...

It hurts my feelings when you judge women based on their gender, it feels like an attack on part of my identity I have no control over. I've not done anything wrong and you assume things about me because I'm a woman.


:/ That hurts.

I'm not attacking you at all. I don't mean all women just this one in particular.

As I've said before there are loads and loads of lovely women out there !

---

This reminds of this lass I asked out over 10 years ago. I asked her twice and she very rude about it. A few years later she apparently went to this house party and 'got off with' some bloke who was there. She decided in a few minutes that she wanted to be involved with him. I wasn't good enough yet she decides in a moment this other guy is. Why was he so desirable compared to me ? It's ***** and I have loads of situations similar. Complete ******s getting the girl instead of me. Blokes who cheat, are rude, have no manners, do drugs. It's not fair but I honestly don't give a **** anymore. Their loss.

She found him attractive, not you. You can't really criticize her for that, as I doubt you would want to be involved with someone you weren't attracted to.

Sometimes I think 'bad behaviour' is interpreted as good if the guy's desirable and has charisma, which is a shame, but who are we to criticise, right?

You know, guys...

It hurts my feelings when you judge women based on their gender, it feels like an attack on part of my identity I have no control over. I've not done anything wrong and you assume things about me because I'm a woman.


:/ That hurts.

Wait, what?
Im no fan of a lot of the comments I see here at times, but saying that TB and Ardour are suggesting you personally did something wrong or are assuming anything about you as a person (because of your sex) doesn't make much sense to me (in the context of this thread and in general).
I feel their comments are...well, a bit tactless to be honest, but I'm not sure they were attacking the female gender in this case.

I'm not attacking women in general just the women who have treated me badly in the past. Just those. I love women.[/quote]

 

[SophiaGrace]

Eve, this is my perspective...sometimes it doesn't have to be said in the sense of "Soph, you're a girl, therefore you like bad boys." It doesn't have to be direct. If they keep saying it about other women and I already know that they feel this way about women in general...then it automatically applies to me as well.

I'm just hurt.

I see where you're coming from, Sophia. I'm sorry it's hurtful for you. :\

I think also that for a lot of people when they go through a lot of bad things in life, they tend to generalise those things that caused them hurt or pain... it shouldn't be this way.. but that's what most humans do, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. It's not fair though. Like everything else in this world.

You're right.

They're just hurt and no, life isn't fair.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Eve, this is my perspective...sometimes it doesn't have to be said in the sense of "Soph, you're a girl, therefore you like bad boys." It doesn't have to be direct. If they keep saying it about other women and I already know that they feel this way about women in general...then it automatically applies to me as well.

I'm just hurt.

I see where you're coming from, Sophia. I'm sorry it's hurtful for you. :\

I think also that for a lot of people when they go through a lot of bad things in life, they tend to generalise those things that caused them hurt or pain... it shouldn't be this way.. but that's what most humans do, sometimes intentionally, sometimes not. It's not fair though. Like everything else in this world.

You're right.

They're just hurt and no, life isn't fair.

it isn't.

I am a really nice person. (I know I don't come across on here as one sometimes !)

And I haven't been given a chance by a woman. I haven't cheated or lied or treated a girlfriend like crap. I don't do drugs or do anything remotely bad to people. I treat people in a nice way. I respect people's feelings. I care. So when I think why I am not attractive to women, I come to the conclusion that it's to do with how I look, how I sound and my life in general. So that's where the bitterness comes from.