I think my shyness puts guys off

[edgecrusher]

shyness wouldnt put me off. im shy myself. shyness is kinda cute if you ask me. although i am so shy that another shy person might not work for me. i might need someone who isnt very shy to help break me out of my shell.

 

[Knight]

shyness wouldnt put me off. im shy myself. shyness is kinda cute if you ask me. although i am so shy that another shy person might not work for me. i might need someone who sint bery shy to help break me out of my shell.

I know what you mean I'm the exact same way.

 

[Samuel Lonewolf]

I have to put forth more effort into the conversation when talking to shy girls. It's difficult for me to tell if she's bored or just shy from the lack of response.

 

[Danny]

Hello everyone.

Hi Panda.

I noticed you said:
"I've been spending the last few months looking at myself and how I act, how I talk, etc"

This is probably not a great idea, I have a habit of doing this sometimes and in my own experience it only makes you more self conscious.

Shyness is certainly not unattractive.

From a guys perspective, if a girl is talkative and confident and friendly then you know that you can look for cues and signs which will tell you if she is interested. If a girl is shy its much more of a risk, its harder to tell if she likes you and that means there is a greater chance of getting it wrong and being rejected.

In this sense its actually our (guys) insecurity and fear of rejection that is the problem.

You dont have to talk loudly or alot to let a guy know you are interested either, infact for me a smile and eye contact are alot more powerful than even the most interesting conversation.

Hope this helps.

 

[IVIZ]

Yeah I agree with Danny

For us guys we constantly need to be told and comfirmed that what we offer to the opposite sex is acceptable or enjoyed. Its like a dumb cave man always going " ugh ugh, you like, yes? ugh ugh" over and over through out the conversation.

If your shy, the you got them confused and they will automatically start to think that what their bringing to you is not wanted because of a non positive reaction.

ugh ugh lol

 

[JonJon]

Shyness doesn't put guys off. A lot of guys find Shyness attractive/cute. Although Shyness can sometimes be misinterpreted as hostility and makes it look like you're not interested.

 

[Ludvan]

Its amazing how people feel and see things the same way.
I think the same way as you do, i'm shy and scared of women but recently i figured it out!
In 90% of all cases its the main felling "fear" that drives people to go "underground" and disconnect from the world.
Usually the smarter the person is the more self conscious it gets and more fears comes to be.
There is only one way to get pass this terrible thing that is loneliness.
Put yourself out there, stop thinking about the consequences of exposing yourself, do something for your community like firefighters.
Start thinking to yourself that you are good and smart and a wonderful human being, this might be a lie and you might know it or feel it. but if you lie to yourself for sometime you will start to believe in yourself.
When you believe in yourself all of your self esteem will vanish.
Take in consideration that this process takes time but it really works.

 

[trZ]

How about not lying to yourself, and just do the changes needed for you to think that you are a good person? That would be better if you ask me, on so many levels.

 

[ShybutHi]

I think its different for women than men.... For men shyness in a woman can be very attractive, maybe even desirable for some men. I dont think shyness is a desirable attribute in a man for women.

 

[jjam]

I can see how shyness could be mistaken for something else (like conceitedness) and that something else would be the put off. I was about to say I can't see how a guy could be put off by a girl's shyness but the smarter part of me understands just how different people can be from each other. I'm not at all turned off by shyness. Maybe it's because I can relate to those who are that way a great deal. Nevertheless, it would be silly of me to think no guy could possibly be put off by it.

 

[EveWasFramed]

I think that being outgoing is also off-putting for some. Some people don't care for people who are...well, more brazen.

 

[Badjedidude]

^^^I love outgoing wimmins. (hello)

 

[EveWasFramed]

lol, trust me in this...some DONT.

 

[Badjedidude]

^^^Oh, I know that. I was just saying... I don't mind it so much.