I'm a 33 year old virgin male without even a date to my name.

[user 115627]

I think everyone has an inherent checklist, but one should be wary of which things are standards and which are preferences. I think it's okay to hold onto the former if they are akin to principles which would violate either your personal beliefs or common sense. Preferences in terms of minor superficialities are nice-to-have, but ultimately a matter of taste...some are worth sacrificing more than others. Just don't sacrifice your standards for the sake of preferences.

And stay away from the meat market.

 

[TheRealCallie]

IMO if a girl likes you it doesn't matter. But if she doesn't  then she wants something more than just you. This "something" could be anything including sexual experience. (I suppose that works for both genders)

I don't think I know any woman who really cares about partner's experience but I don't know all the women. Also I think if a woman has no or little experience she may prefer the same man.

This.  Also, I think it would be refreshing to date a guy without experience.  No ex drama, no chance of STDs, etc etc.  And unless you live under a rock, it's not like you don't know the basics, so who cares.

Are you available by any chance?

I missed this one.  If you are talking to me, sorry, but I'm not. lol

 

[Lacrecia]

IMO if a girl likes you it doesn't matter. But if she doesn't  then she wants something more than just you. This "something" could be anything including sexual experience. (I suppose that works for both genders)

I don't think I know any woman who really cares about partner's experience but I don't know all the women. Also I think if a woman has no or little experience she may prefer the same man.

This.  Also, I think it would be refreshing to date a guy without experience.  No ex drama, no chance of STDs, etc etc.  And unless you live under a rock, it's not like you don't know the basics, so who cares.

Are you available by any chance?

She's with me.  :club:

 

[Forgottendanfan]

IMO if a girl likes you it doesn't matter. But if she doesn't  then she wants something more than just you. This "something" could be anything including sexual experience. (I suppose that works for both genders)

I don't think I know any woman who really cares about partner's experience but I don't know all the women. Also I think if a woman has no or little experience she may prefer the same man.

This.  Also, I think it would be refreshing to date a guy without experience.  No ex drama, no chance of STDs, etc etc.  And unless you live under a rock, it's not like you don't know the basics, so who cares.

Are you available by any chance?

She's with me.  :club:

Ohh! Did you meet on here?

 

[Hazed]

Ohh! Did you meet on here?

Do not be discouraged, i heard there's a chance still.

 

[Abstamyous]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

 

[Forgottendanfan]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

Nobody even messages me or responds to my meesages, so I'm doubtful of that.

 

[Abstamyous]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

Nobody even messages me or responds to my meesages, so I'm doubtful of that.

I have been on here, off and on, for 7 years. It hasn't been a very simple process.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

Nobody even messages me or responds to my meesages, so I'm doubtful of that.

A lot of people don't reply to random messages.  Or as Rodent said elsewhere, they may not come to the forum anymore to see that they have a message.  Do these people read the messages?

 

[ardour]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

Nobody even messages me or responds to my meesages, so I'm doubtful of that.

You realize we're from different parts of the globe, right? Unless you're in to a (very) long distance relationships this  might not be the best place for it.

 

[Forgottendanfan]

I found a pretty great person on here.

I know of other couples as well.

There's hope all around.

Nobody even messages me or responds to my meesages, so I'm doubtful of that.

You realize we're from different parts of the globe, right? Unless you're in to a (very) long distance relationships this  might not be the best place for it.

Of course, but other people have managed to find partners here, so it's obviously not too much of an unrealistic endeavour.

 

[TheSkaFish]

Of course, but other people have managed to find partners here, so it's obviously not too much of an unrealistic endeavour.

It's true that if you do find someone, it's probably going to be a long-distance situation, but you don't really lose anything by trying to strike up a correspondence. And like you said, it's happened for others. I'd say it's worth a shot.

 

[Forgottendanfan]

Of course, but other people have managed to find partners here, so it's obviously not too much of an unrealistic endeavour.

It's true that if you do find someone, it's probably going to be a long-distance situation, but you don't really lose anything by trying to strike up a correspondence.  And like you said, it's happened for others.  I'd say it's worth a shot.

Exactly. This is pretty much a last ditch attempt as far as I'm concerned, and I think I'm more likely to find someone who's accepting of my situation on a site like this, than on a dating website, where it's all very superficial and looks/status driven.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I think I'm more likely to find someone who's accepting of my situation on a site like this, than on a dating website, where it's all very superficial and looks/status driven.

I've thought that too. I don't think I'd be able to relate very well to someone who's been popular/high status and always had an easy time finding acceptance socially.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Okay, I'm sorry but are you aware that there are girls who struggle with the same things are those dating sites that you are bashing? I mean seriously, it's horrible when it happens to you, but it's perfectly fine if you do it to the girls you don't want or aren't pretty enough or whatever?

---

I get that you guys have a certain "ideal woman" in your head. Everyone does, but if you've never had a relationship, how the **** do you know what you want? Hell, I have had plenty of relationships and I don't know what the **** I want.
My point is, if you pass over this girl or that girl because she doesn't match your ideal woman, aren't you just as bad as the women you complain about? What's the harm in giving someone a shot? Worse case scenario, you meet someone new and get out there and get experience.

 

[TheSkaFish]

Okay, I'm sorry but are you aware that there are girls who struggle with the same things are those dating sites that you are bashing? I mean seriously, it's horrible when it happens to you, but it's perfectly fine if you do it to the girls you don't want or aren't pretty enough or whatever?

Not sure if this was meant for me or Forgottendanfan, but I try not to do this anymore - saying that someone is boring and lame, or not hot enough, or whatever. They're not objectively bad people, just probably not the experience I'm looking for. When I would say stuff like that especially in my early years here, I was in an angry mindset (though I didn't know at the time, but my life was much better then and I really had less to be angry about) and also I expressed myself kind of lazily and frustratedly and might have taken my anger out on them in that sense.

It's not necessarily that they're not pretty enough or that I don't want them or anything like that. I only meant that the girls who were high status/popular/had an easier time socially probably have different interests, personalities, experiences, and worldviews that would make it hard for me to relate to and connect, and they probably wouldn't see much commonality in me either. Because of what we like, the way we are, the way things have gone for us, and how we feel about it, we probably wouldn't see things the same way.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Okay, I'm sorry but are you aware that there are girls who struggle with the same things are those dating sites that you are bashing?  I mean seriously, it's horrible when it happens to you, but it's perfectly fine if you do it to the girls you don't want or aren't pretty enough or whatever?

Not sure if this was meant for me or Forgottendanfan, but I try not to do this anymore.

I only meant that the girls who were high status/popular/had an easier time socially probably have different interests, personalities,  experiences, and worldviews that would make it hard for me to relate to and connect.  Because of what we like, the way we are, the way things have gone for us, and how we feel about it, we probably wouldn't see things the same way.

So you just assume it's pointless?  Ever hear of the phrase "opposites attract"?  I don't know what some of the others look like, bit I have seen you and you are not a bad looking guy.

 

[Forgottendanfan]

Okay, I'm sorry but are you aware that there are girls who struggle with the same things are those dating sites that you are bashing?  I mean seriously, it's horrible when it happens to you, but it's perfectly fine if you do it to the girls you don't want or aren't pretty enough or whatever?

---

I get that you guys have a certain "ideal woman" in your head.  Everyone does, but if you've never had a relationship, how the **** do you know what you want? Hell, I have had plenty of relationships and I don't know what the **** I want.
My point is, if you pass over this girl or that girl because she doesn't match your ideal woman, aren't you just as bad as the women you complain about? What's the harm in giving someone a shot?  Worse case scenario, you meet someone new and get out there and get experience.

---

Sorry Callie, I don't quite understand your point. It's late over here and I guess I'm tired. What women am I supposedly passing up? And no, I certainly don't have super high standards and expectations. My ideal woman definitely isn't the kind of lady you'd see on magazine covers, I can assure you of that.

 

[Aardra]

What women am I supposedly passing up?

I'm not interested, but the fact that you refuse to even acknowledge that you HAVE had at least one response is incredibly frustrating. It just wasn't what you expected. That's what Jen is saying.

I might not be as you said "born as such" but I am a woman, and I messaged you. That means women are willing to give you a chance. So acknowledge that.

And for what it's worth, I do consider my standards fairly high. I'm just willing to give anyone an opportunity to at least try to meet them.

Edit: grammar

 

[ardour]

nevermind