Lonelier on Facebook?

[MTrip]

It seems some of us know how to use Facebook (& social media, period) quite wisely. I must confess I don't always do that. I started my account there just for my art--we artists always want more exposure for our work. But FB does get addictive; I find some of those white-lettered meme pics hilarious. But as someone here already pointed out, Facebook is no substitute for socializing in the real world. I also don't have many friends there--I've never had more than 44 on the list. Having hundreds of "friends" there means you have watchers or admirers, not real friends you know intimately. Sometimes I ignore my account for a bit or shut it down temporarily, to get things done in the real world.

Having said all that, if you'd like to see my work or talk to me there, look for Moebius Trip.

 

[duff]

I delete anybody who gets on my nerves. I have 21 friends on there now. All cool people !

 

[Skid Row 89]

I delete anybody who gets on my nerves. I have 21 friends on there now. All cool people !

21 good, reliable friends is quite a lot, I wish I had that many.

 

[duff]

I delete anybody who gets on my nerves. I have 21 friends on there now. All cool people !

21 good, reliable friends is quite a lot, I wish I had that many.

facebook friends more like. Some are family members as well !

 

[Peaches]

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/05/is-facebook-making-us-lonely/308930/

 

[Siertes]

A depressing read but very true. I'm glad I deleted mine way back in August though I don't really feel any better for it now but I didn't think it would profoundly change my social life. My social life is crap because that's just the type of person I developed into: a dull, socially ******** person who couldn't hold a conversation for 5 minutes if promised riches at the end.

 

[9006]

http://www.alonelylife.com/showthread.php?tid=30773&pid=598799#pid598799

 

[Triple Bogey]

I use it to post my photo's, some people seem to like them.
And nose about reading about other people's life's.

 

[Tulip23]

Facebook is good to keep in touch with family if they live miles away.

Other than that its crap..Who wants to hear what you had for breakfast,or how long you waited for a bus.
So what if you have 400 false friends on your page.So many young people have had their hearts broken when they have found their partners cheating via facebook.
Facebook destroys our lonely souls.Get rid..Not that I have an account anyway

 

[Sci-Fi]

http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/05/is-facebook-making-us-lonely/308930/

Merged with this thread, similar topic.

 

[AliceInWonderLand]

I have always been excluded from everything by my so called friends, ( actually I haven't got the faintest idea as to what the word 'friend' means), so I don't feel so bad on social networks when I don't see myself sharing other people's happiness. But there are times when I go blue due to Facebook use, when people mistake me for someone else and keeps congratulating the other person beneath my photograph and the other person calmly replies in acknowledgement, all in the comments section of my post!!! :-(

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Trust me you're not alone. Anytime I log on Facebook, not many people contact me. Only very few people contact me. I usually check it once a week and I spend most of my time doing something to keep myself busy or logging on Forums. Forums are a lot more enjoyable to me than Facebook. That's my personal choice though. Facebook kinda bores me and I only have it so certain people can contact me.

 

[pandas123]

I know exactly how you feel, im in the same situation here. I try not to go on facebook as much anymore. I've even considered deleting it but then that would mean cutting off everybody.

 

[daughter of the moon]

I don't agree at all. Facebook has been a controversial thing almost since it started, and now it's just being used as yet another scapegoat.
Facebook doesn't make us lonely, and it doesn't make our lives crappier. All the tools we need in order to change our situation are right within us, right in our hands. So what if 20 of your FB friends all changed their relationship status to "in a relationship" on the same day (as an example)? It doesn't have crap to do with you (unless you're the one they're in a relationship with...). If you don't like it, delete your account. But don't keep it just so you can log on once in a while and afterwards complain about how crappy it makes you feel. It's just so comfortable blaming our pain on a faceless entity. And even better because Facebook isn't going to actually defend itself, thus giving us a feeling of automatic win.
I'm amazed at how many people I've recently heard say that Facebook "makes them unhappy", or "is to blame" for depression. Because what? People have the audacity to post "happy couple" pictures? By that reasoning, any gesture of affection between couples should be prohibited out in public as well, lest some lonely person sees it and feels horrible afterwards.
And sure, so many hearts get broken because people catch their partner cheating on Facebook, thus Facebook is evil. Really? So if someone walked in on their boyfriend humping some other girl, the heart wouldn't be equally broken?

Cut it out. Give Facebook a rest. If you're miserable, the reason is within you, and so is the solution. Stop looking for scapegoats. Change something about your situation. You can post your success on FB, and try to make others unhappy with it, because that's what it's there for, right? To make others unhappy? And make sure you never smile or laugh loudly out in public, because some miserable person may take offense to it.

 

[Marios]

I don't agree at all. Facebook has been a controversial thing almost since it started, and now it's just being used as yet another scapegoat.
Facebook doesn't make us lonely, and it doesn't make our lives crappier. All the tools we need in order to change our situation are right within us, right in our hands. So what if 20 of your FB friends all changed their relationship status to "in a relationship" on the same day (as an example)? It doesn't have crap to do with you (unless you're the one they're in a relationship with...). If you don't like it, delete your account. But don't keep it just so you can log on once in a while and afterwards complain about how crappy it makes you feel. It's just so comfortable blaming our pain on a faceless entity. And even better because Facebook isn't going to actually defend itself, thus giving us a feeling of automatic win.
I'm amazed at how many people I've recently heard say that Facebook "makes them unhappy", or "is to blame" for depression. Because what? People have the audacity to post "happy couple" pictures? By that reasoning, any gesture of affection between couples should be prohibited out in public as well, lest some lonely person sees it and feels horrible afterwards.
And sure, so many hearts get broken because people catch their partner cheating on Facebook, thus Facebook is evil. Really? So if someone walked in on their boyfriend humping some other girl, the heart wouldn't be equally broken?

Cut it out. Give Facebook a rest. If you're miserable, the reason is within you, and so is the solution. Stop looking for scapegoats. Change something about your situation. You can post your success on FB, and try to make others unhappy with it, because that's what it's there for, right? To make others unhappy? And make sure you never smile or laugh loudly out in public, because some miserable person may take offense to it.

Well said.

 

[FreedomFromLiberty]

I don't agree at all. Facebook has been a controversial thing almost since it started, and now it's just being used as yet another scapegoat.
Facebook doesn't make us lonely, and it doesn't make our lives crappier. All the tools we need in order to change our situation are right within us, right in our hands. So what if 20 of your FB friends all changed their relationship status to "in a relationship" on the same day (as an example)? It doesn't have crap to do with you (unless you're the one they're in a relationship with...). If you don't like it, delete your account. But don't keep it just so you can log on once in a while and afterwards complain about how crappy it makes you feel. It's just so comfortable blaming our pain on a faceless entity. And even better because Facebook isn't going to actually defend itself, thus giving us a feeling of automatic win.
I'm amazed at how many people I've recently heard say that Facebook "makes them unhappy", or "is to blame" for depression. Because what? People have the audacity to post "happy couple" pictures? By that reasoning, any gesture of affection between couples should be prohibited out in public as well, lest some lonely person sees it and feels horrible afterwards.
And sure, so many hearts get broken because people catch their partner cheating on Facebook, thus Facebook is evil. Really? So if someone walked in on their boyfriend humping some other girl, the heart wouldn't be equally broken?

Cut it out. Give Facebook a rest. If you're miserable, the reason is within you, and so is the solution. Stop looking for scapegoats. Change something about your situation. You can post your success on FB, and try to make others unhappy with it, because that's what it's there for, right? To make others unhappy? And make sure you never smile or laugh loudly out in public, because some miserable person may take offense to it.

I've actually taken all of your advice quite some time ago and never bother logging into my FB or myspsace account anymore because of the distress simply logging in causes me. It's good advice. That being said social networking sites ARE a contributor to depression, as the studies say. I'm glad to see that science is catching up with what I've known and felt for years now.

The problem with social networking sites is that practically everything that you do on them becomes globally available, instantly. This consequence stops people from behaving as they would in real life, and people will usually chosee to put only the best parts of their lives out for the global public to see. What you end up with is a highly skewed profile view of people who have the appearance of the perfect, fun, exciting life.

The flipside of this phenomenon is that you are left with an unfilled emotional void by seeing nothing by smiling happy people all the time. You instinctively know that not all of life is perfect or happy, and sites such as this one then crop up to fill the void. Sites like this one work only because of the anonymity that they provide. You can rant about your problems until the cows come home, and not have to worry how you look to the global public in the process.

The reason there are so many threads bashing FB on this forum anyway is because it's practically impossible to get away from FB. It's everywhere. It's in the news, the FB share buttons are on most sites, people talk about it, I see the apps on people's phones. Even when I go to the library and walk around the computer room, you are sure to see at least a few people diddling around with their FB accounts.

The reminder that you are NOT using it while all the rest of the world is, is pretty much constant. This obviously touches on a raw nerve for the people who feel that FB is only a problem in their lives and voila, you get a new thread bashing FB! Of course FB doesn't by itself make anyone lonely. But it is like salting a wound.

By the way, does NOBODY remember MySpace? It was like FB of like 5 years ago! It hated that site just as much then as I hate FB now.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I don't agree at all. Facebook has been a controversial thing almost since it started, and now it's just being used as yet another scapegoat.
Facebook doesn't make us lonely, and it doesn't make our lives crappier. All the tools we need in order to change our situation are right within us, right in our hands. So what if 20 of your FB friends all changed their relationship status to "in a relationship" on the same day (as an example)? It doesn't have crap to do with you (unless you're the one they're in a relationship with...). If you don't like it, delete your account. But don't keep it just so you can log on once in a while and afterwards complain about how crappy it makes you feel. It's just so comfortable blaming our pain on a faceless entity. And even better because Facebook isn't going to actually defend itself, thus giving us a feeling of automatic win.
I'm amazed at how many people I've recently heard say that Facebook "makes them unhappy", or "is to blame" for depression. Because what? People have the audacity to post "happy couple" pictures? By that reasoning, any gesture of affection between couples should be prohibited out in public as well, lest some lonely person sees it and feels horrible afterwards.
And sure, so many hearts get broken because people catch their partner cheating on Facebook, thus Facebook is evil. Really? So if someone walked in on their boyfriend humping some other girl, the heart wouldn't be equally broken?

Cut it out. Give Facebook a rest. If you're miserable, the reason is within you, and so is the solution. Stop looking for scapegoats. Change something about your situation. You can post your success on FB, and try to make others unhappy with it, because that's what it's there for, right? To make others unhappy? And make sure you never smile or laugh loudly out in public, because some miserable person may take offense to it.

Ah, my sentiments exactly.

 

[daughter of the moon]

Ah, my sentiments exactly.

lol

 

[ladyforsaken]

Ah, my sentiments exactly.

lol

 

[Midnight Sky]

It's not always about them changing their status to "in a relationship". There are often other factors that get to people.

And to make this clear, it isn't facebook itself that is the problem for some folks. It is the stuff they READ on people's pages.