M

[Rosebolt]

I'll get straight to the point. I am M. http://www.alonelylife.com/member.php?action=profile&uid=60843

That guy.

It was part of the plan i made to get my brain back to normal functioning, which it hadn't, since that little breakdown from work i had. All i could come up with was either that, or to plunge myself in a depression. The second option had too much downsides, so i chose project M.

M was supposed to be smart guy, and by making mentally challanging threads, i would be able to activate my brain again. Why not on Rose? Well, the reasons i had back then were that, as rose, i had an image to keep up. People expected me to behave a certain way. Or so i thought. I couldn't be coldly honest on Rose, as that would ruin my only social outlet. Obviously, M is nothing more than a product of weakness on my part.

Project M didn't go that well, and i ended up just saying things i thought deep down on Rose instead, with disasterous results. I made serious mistakes the past 24 hours, and confessing to this utter ******** i came up with is part of the punishment i need to give me.

I'm well on my way to the second option, the depression part. It might have more drawbacks, but at least i'm not bothering people that don't need to be bothered with that one.

I'm writing this all very fast, before i change my mind and keep M a secret still, so i probably skipped alot of reasons and all that stuff. But i just can't focus on it, i just can't remember much. All i know is that it was very weak of me to do so, and that i need to pay for what i've done yesterday.

Commence scolding.

 

[9006]

I'll get straight to the point. I am M. http://www.alonelylife.com/member.php?ac...&uid=60843

That guy.

It was part of the plan i made to get my brain back to normal functioning, which it hadn't, since that little breakdown from work i had. All i could come up with was either that, or to plunge myself in a depression. The second option had too much downsides, so i chose project M.

M was supposed to be smart guy, and by making mentally challanging threads, i would be able to activate my brain again. Why not on Rose? Well, the reasons i had back then were that, as rose, i had an image to keep up. People expected me to behave a certain way. Or so i thought. I couldn't be coldly honest on Rose, as that would ruin my only social outlet. Obviously, M is nothing more than a product of weakness on my part.

Project M didn't go that well, and i ended up just saying things i thought deep down on Rose instead, with disasterous results. I made serious mistakes the past 24 hours, and confessing to this utter ******** i came up with is part of the punishment i need to give me.

I'm well on my way to the second option, the depression part. It might have more drawbacks, but at least i'm not bothering people that don't need to be bothered with that one.

I'm writing this all very fast, before i change my mind and keep M a secret still, so i probably skipped alot of reasons and all that stuff. But i just can't focus on it, i just can't remember much. All i know is that it was very weak of me to do so, and that i need to pay for what i've done yesterday.

Commence scolding.

Sorry but that's the worst plan I've ever read.

Have you got MPD? If not I seriously cannot understand what the point in it was, all this people expect me to act a certain way ******** is just that, you are you an if they don't like that then big deal.

My response isn't exactly full of positives, I'm seriously having my doubts. I think you need to mature up an get over yourself.

 

[Poguesy]

I am Shirley.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Well since you are going public with this now you'll find your other account banned seeing as duplicate accounts are not usually allowed.

 

[Naleena]

But......but......I liked M. I welcomed him and everything. :-( What a fool I was to believe he could be real. What a fool I was. M! Oh, M! ** sobs** whooooo-whyyyyy???

 

[Poguesy]

Why are you trying to hide who you are?

**** what anyone else thinks.

 

[Naleena]

Why are you trying to hide who you are?

**** what anyone else thinks.

That's my boy John would be proud of you

 

[Edward W]

I made serious mistakes the past 24 hours

Rose, first thing first, don't dwell on this or beat yourself up in anyway, that won't help, so put it aside.

However, take something away from this - just be yourself. You have no need to create alt accounts.

While I wouldn't use Poguesy's language, I do actually agree with the sentiment. Be who you are.

Not everyone on this site will like you, not everyone on this site will like me, or X or Y etc etc. Accept it, don't aim for that.

I'm not sure what people expect from you, (or me), what you think you must be for other people. You can only be you.

So be honest, say what you want to say. If someone doesn't agree, so what? And not everyone will agree with you, its a fact of life. But those who stick by you, (even if they don't always agree), those are the people you want to know better.

I'm not sure that makes the sense I'd hoped it would when I started, hopefulyl you see my point anyway.

I'm not as available as I'd like, with one thing and another, but you can always PM me and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

 

[Walley]

I have to agree with the last few posts.
you shouldn't feel you need to pretend to be anything that you aren't. or hide any aspects of your personality that you fear.

when I first came on the internet many many years ago, my very first experience talking to someone was with a guy who turned out to be a pro football player who was in astronaut training and flew MIG's on the weekends. so I told him I was an 18yr old blonde who can only find time to chat online just after I get out of the shower while i'm drying myself off.
anyways.. my wife and I had a good laugh at the time about it all, but when I walked away I thought to myself.. is that what its all about? everyone trying to pretend to be there fantasy and no one being real? and so began my quest to always be as real as I possibly can (besides my name)
I have used the same online nic names for pretty much 14yrs now. ive been hated, loved, respected and disrespected. but all the while it's been ME and no one can hold that against you.
sure lots of times I felt regret for being too open and showing my bad sides or issues and letting myself be judged by people. but honestly?
in the end it ALWAYS works out for the best and I have turned many foes into friends because of it.

 

[Scotsman]

Makes you wonder who's who.

 

[ladyforsaken]

sure lots of times I felt regret for being too open and showing my bad sides or issues and letting myself be judged by people. but honestly?
in the end it ALWAYS works out for the best and I have turned many foes into friends because of it.

Walley - you're totally right there. I can't agree more to what you've said there. Well said.

And Rose, I've said to you what I wanted to say to you. I know you for you and I know things happen for a reason and people do things for a reason. You've got yours. I'm here for support, you know that.

 

[Felix]

No offense dude but you sound a bit crazy.

 

[Edward W]

...you sound a bit crazy.

All the best people are!

 

[9006]

No offense dude but you sound a bit crazy.

Haha.

 

[Rosebolt]

No offense dude but you sound a bit crazy.

What makes you say that? And in what kind of way do you mean?

 

[Bones]

@ Rose

 

[Felix]

No offense dude but you sound a bit crazy.

What makes you say that? And in what kind of way do you mean?

I don't really mean you're crazy in general, just that this thread sounded crazy to me cus you're talking about yourself as if you had another personality within you.

 

[SophiaGrace]

No offense dude but you sound a bit crazy.

What makes you say that? And in what kind of way do you mean?

I don't really mean you're crazy in general, just that this thread sounded crazy to me cus you're talking about yourself as if you had another personality within you.

I think he's just stressed and doesn't know what to do...

 

[Sarah_Lbnz]

...you sound a bit crazy.

All the best people are!

Hell YEAH!

Rosebolt: I accept you. As Rose or as M. I think I understand a little bit, because I have many different aspects of myself too, being complex and soooo complicated . Some people may judge you, but who cares about them? I much prefer it when people are interesting and multi-dimensional, they're way more fun that way.

Plus that long post (the one that I PM'ed you about) was the only post I've ever saved and printed out to look at when I'm feeling blue. If M or XYZ or "*********69" is the same person who wrote that gem, then they're ok in my book.

Thank you for sharing this.

*hugs*

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Speaking as someone who cares about you, Rose, just be who you are. Don't pretend to be something you're not.