Man, love drives me crazy

[the-alchemist]

I'm starting to go crazy from my frickin' loneliness. There is this girl in my university who I am in love with. I've only talked to her a few times but when we've talked, we've been able to talk about everything. I'm sure you've heard this cliché countless times but she is both beautiful and intelligent. She is not the type of girl who puts on tons of makeup and stuff like that.

So in any case, I think about her almost all the time. It has gotten to the point where I often go to the university library in hopes of coming across her. She used to spend a lot of time in the library but I don't see her there anymore. I mean ****, I go there almost everyday eventhough I don't have any schoolwork to do there. We used to attend the same class in one of the courses but that course has ended now, which severely limits my possibilities to encounter her.

And my university is a bit far away from where I live. I have to take the ******* commuter train to get there. That's how crazy it has driven me. Thing is, if she had shown clear signs that she was not interested in me, I could have let it go easily. But that was not the case, we laughed and we had a good time, as short as those lasted.

I do have her e-mail address, but I know with 99% certainty that if I mail her out of the blue just like that she will think that I am a creep. I dunno, I just need to know how she feels about me somehow.

Another problem I have is now, when I'm lonely, I keep fantasizing about me and her being together, kissing and hugging, talking to eachother. I fear that I'm starting to get sucked into my fantasy world, losin touch with reality when it comes to her. Otherwise I do study and have a part time job.

I'm losing my mind over the girl, I want her so bad. Not a day goes by where I don't imagine encountering her in the library and get her to go out on a date with me. I do not know what to do anymore, the loneliness is killing me

 

[trZ]

The next time you meet her, ask for her number. Easy as that. Yeah it is easier said than done but you know you have to.

The fantasizing part is just normal, although ideally you wouldn't find yourself in this position this early, but I understand that is a part of being lonely to feel like this. I've been there myself.

You need to make a move and it needs to happen quick. Ask for her number, ask her out, make it OBVIOUS where you want with this - If not you are guaranteed the friend zone, if you're not already place there. I think its best that you just make your intensions clear and make your move as quickly as possible. If you get shot down, yes it will hurt but it is WAY better to just get it overwith than to torture yourself like this.

Take a chance, man.

 

[SkuzzieMuff]

It is a good point that you brought up, that you feel your getting sucked into it, and losing touch. That totally does happen, but if you talked together happily, at least you're not heading for a disaster course of disappointment. You've got to find a way to talk to her somehow, but maybe she knows you're always in the library, so she doesn't go anymore. Do you have a facebook? Do you know her name? Would you be able to add her and a bunch of other school friends so that you may increase your chances of talking to her? I find that facebook works nicely in the getting to know people stages of early relationships. Either that, or you could E-mail and tell her that you haven't seen her around in awhile, and you wanted to know if she was ok.
Just, if and when you do get to see her, don't let your fantasies carry you away. You still want to give her time to get to know you, and let her decide whether or not she does like you. You don't want to force the idea that she should like you, or even worse, act like she already does and move too quick.
I really hope you manage to come in contact with her. Sounds like a perfectly innocent situation that should go the right direction. Maybe she'd like it if you tried to reach out to her. Women want to be wanted. They like being chased. Sometimes, they'll do things to entice a man so he will chase her. I hope you haven't missed your chance. Good luck!
'

 

[neejau]

I have to agree with both of the 2 posts above me! You do have to show her intrest, and I also think Face-book or anything like that could be a good place to start. Personally don't know face-book itself but what I once did when I was in a somewhat same situation, I added the person a social networking site (some dutch thing, i'll just call it facebook in this post) and just started a very normal conversation. I did my best to keep the conversation alive for a week or 2, or 3.. Can't remember and I asked her msn since it is "easier" to talk. Well and there I was with the msn address of the girl I dreamed about It was a good start. To bad I screwed up later. :club:

Might help or get you some more idea's.

 

[trZ]

I don't mean to sound disrespectful or whatever, but I really don't think facebook/email etc is such a good idea. Get it going on in person as quick as possible. To be honest, I think girls find it weird to be writing on facebook/email and not in real life. The time you spend with her early is very important for your chances of reaching your goal.

Again as I said, just ask her out as fast as you can, no fear man. You don't fear her, you don't fear getting rejected, because you've got options.

 

[Code S.O.L]

Out of interest, were you feeling the effects of loneliness before you developed feelings for her?

 

[jjam]

You've just gotta grow some balls and email her, bro.
Email her and get her number or email her and give her your number or both. If you stay out of touch then people will think you're not interested enough, even when they're constantly in your thoughts.

Don't screw yourself over by denying yourself a chance. You think about this girl. SHOW HER.

 

[Badjedidude]

******* GO FOR IT, MAN!!

What do you gain by sitting around WISHING all the time?

Email that chick and ask her out for some coffee.

Show her you have some balls.

 

[Syber Tiger]

to just go for it is not easy but try to force your self

i am grazy about this girl in my math class it was like love @ 1st site it was in jan this yest 1st day of school after december holladay

but after the few mounths i have heard the side of hir i dont realy like but still want hir??

she is the money seeking tipe (over heard hir saying "i only still go out with him cuz he gives me money) and this i heard resently her and her friends talked
and shy like to fool with ppl for free stuff and shy dont want to say that like give a hug and so on

i have started likeing her friend but shy is a player one day that man the next day a new one
the
other girl in my ingeneering class i talk to but notmutch kinda like hir to
but shy did 3guys in one night so ppl say she is a whore

why do i always fell in love with the wrong girl and dong have the confedents to go talk to them out of my own -_-

 

[the-alchemist]

Sorry I haven't been active. It's been busy, and good.

I finally came across the girl I like as I was heading toward the pentry to eat some lunch. We encountered eachother on the way. I took a deep breath before I asked her if she wanted to have lunch with me.

She said YES!

We sat down and talked. I was a bit nervous. Not a nerve wreck but still a bit nervous enough to come across as a bit boring. But still, it ended pretty well and we agreed to see eachother next week! Thanks for the support here

So far so good I suppose. We're gonna take a walk downtown in the city but I don't know what I should do next. Any suggestions on what we should do? Provided she does not cancel the plans, that is a concern that is nagging at the back of my head

 

[trZ]

Great!

I suggest having *** with her.

~~ Or, at least make it obvious what you're going for. I.e go for the kiss when the timing is right (its never gonna be so brace yourself). Girls are kind of stupid in this respect, they think guys actually wants to be friends (please don't read to much into this ppl). Just go for it And dude, don't think about "coming across as boring". Just don't try to impress her in any way. Not about who you are, what you've done or what you've got. Don't try to impress her and make your move. Thats the best advice I can give.