My Cosmetic Surgery Journey?

[okidoke]

Ah no, I think rejection effects most men and women very differently, I don't internalise rejection like a lot of men do, in my mind he's simply not attracted to women. I think men should try it, saves a lot of stress lol.

Oh yeah deffo processed, it's hard to find a picture on the internet today that hasn't been through the trenches of filters but I think it's harsh, if she was uglier the connotation is she is nicer, thats a global thing, even me, literally the same person, when I was uglier people assumed I was nicer lol after all the changes people assume I am well... mean and stuff, always makes me sad, also in media, the look I like is always portrayed as the bully, when in truth, I've been bullied by all sorts.

To me, I dont think it's fair when a guy is randomly deemed a creep because he looks like a bunch of creeps I knew in the past, but I also dont think the opposite is fair when because you have a certain look that maybe a lot of stuck up girls have, all of a sudden you are stuck up. Trying to break the stereotypes!

I don't think gender has any influence on rejection effect. Some women internalise just as much as men. You don't want to stereotype, but you seem to be happy to generalise lol. I don't practice stereotyping (normally) but I am a very good judge of people, which I learned to be, and I don't just base it on appearance, but a number of other factors. I'm not judging that "model" on just her appearance, but the situational circumstances. Anyway, enough of that. We're getting off on a bit of a tangent here.

If cosmetic surgery makes you a happier person, then I'm happy for you.

Oh and btw, if you look at my model photography, you won't find much, if any, processing of the person. I like to keep it quite raw. The overall image may have some processing for atmosphere, but apart from something eye distracting I don't photoshop much.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I don't think gender has any influence on rejection effect. Some women internalise just as much as men. You don't want to stereotype, but you seem to be happy to generalise lol. I don't practice stereotyping (normally) but I am a very good judge of people, which I learned to be, and I don't just base it on appearance, but a number of other factors. I'm not judging that "model" on just her appearance, but the situational circumstances. Anyway, enough of that. We're getting off on a bit of a tangent here.

If cosmetic surgery makes you a happier person, then I'm happy for you.

Oh and btw, if you look at my model photography, you won't find much, if any, processing of the person. I like to keep it quite raw. The overall image may have some processing for atmosphere, but apart from something eye distracting I don't photoshop much.

The internet is a weird place these days, but I want to make it clear that I am not judging you sir, just stating my opinions not sure how it reads but 100% in a friendly way.... the psychology of men and women are some of my favourite topics as I am a trainee counsellor (currently on pause) it is grief counselling but I read so much studies into these attitudes and behaviours. So fun fact for you, it is actually common for men to internalise rejection because access to women is highly linked to a mans perceived value about themselves and society. Not as common for women, as our value typically increases the more men we are able to avoid up until age 30-35 then everything shifts. I do want to break stereotyping based on looks, as I think it's not cool to judge people based on how they look, I think it's interesting that you think you are not doing that to the model I selected, although I am not sure what else looking at a photo of someone and coming to negative conclusions about them could be?


Yeah cosmetic procedures help me navigate the world with my various mental health conditions.

On a positive note I really enjoyed your photography, your photos deffo have a raw edge that I haven't seen before I can see the experience and I can see that you know how to get the best lighting. I come from the world of over the top photoshopping, if it was legal they would probably replace my arms with sticks lol I have had shoots where I jokingly would ask my ex if he would cheat on me with that girl... because I looked completely different in the end results. What a world!

 

[okidoke]

......................... I want to make it clear that I am not judging you sir, just stating my opinions not sure how it reads but 100% in a friendly way....

I didn't assume you were All good here. We're just chatting.

.......I am a trainee counsellor (currently on pause) it is grief counselling but I read so much studies into these attitudes and behaviours.

No disrespect intended, and I certainly wish you well (my own daughter is getting into that field) but I have met many counsellors in my life through my work and personal experience and a number have been utter dimwits lol.

So fun fact for you, it is actually common for men to internalise rejection because access to women is highly linked to a mans perceived value about themselves and society. Not as common for women, as our value typically increases the more men we are able to avoid up until age 30-35 then everything shifts.

But that isn't statistically correct for the whole world surely. The myriad cultural and social aspects of various countries would influence that a great deal. It's probably more true of America, Canada, England, Australia, parts of Europe, where traditional values have fallen by the wayside into the mire we have now.

I do want to break stereotyping based on looks, as I think it's not cool to judge people based on how they look, I think it's interesting that you think you are not doing that to the model I selected, although I am not sure what else looking at a photo of someone and coming to negative conclusions about them could be?

I already mentioned a bit about how the photo was composed and processed, and one can perhaps extrapolate the circumstances of how the photo came to be taken, but it is highly plausible as well that some average photographer paid that model to pose for him and he asked her to put on that look, but my experience with models is that they regularly like to pose their own faces unless directed otherwise. I could get into model personalities, but I couldn't be bothered tbh - and, if it's just a girl doing a selfie, then there are many other questions to ask about why she posed like that, and the answers most likely would be a bit cringeworthy. If she just smiled, it would've made for a completely different opinion. Anyway, we all judge to some degree. It's in our DNA, for a number of reasons.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Yeah cosmetic procedures help me navigate the world with my various mental health conditions.

See, you saying it like this screams "I'm trying to hide" I have to wonder if it's actually your mental health conditions that are causing you to want all this. I really recommend therapy of some kind before you do any more. Go deep and find the real cause.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

See, you saying it like this screams "I'm trying to hide" I have to wonder if it's actually your mental health conditions that are causing you to want all this. I really recommend therapy of some kind before you do any more. Go deep and find the real cause.

Trust me Callie theres no point I just come out with additional conditions i have an impressive collection nothing says you’re insane like your 4th diagnosis

 

[constant stranger]

CenotaphGirl, I urge you to value yourself. Consider that after incurring all the cosmetic surgeries you're hoping for, you're still going to be you.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

CenotaphGirl, I urge you to value yourself. Consider that after incurring all the cosmetic surgeries you're hoping for, you're still going to be you.

Awh hey Stranger! I'll tryyy... I haven't seen you about in a while, I hope you are doing well

 

[Forgottendanfan]

I have no words......

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I have no words......

Awh no! I thought you would have loads to add but you do know.. its possible to ignore me? who am I kidding… we all know thats impossible

 

[Finished]

BTW, I'm still kind of on board with you changing your eye color so you don't damage your eyes from always wearing your colored contact lenses. BUT, I haven't looked into it enough to know if it's relatively safe or not IF done my a certified eye doctor.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

BTW, I'm still kind of on board with you changing your eye color so you don't damage your eyes from always wearing your colored contact lenses. BUT, I haven't looked into it enough to know if it's relatively safe or not IF done my a certified eye doctor.

Yeah same Finished I spoke to my friends for hours about it and they were like everyone should listen to their body

 

[Forgottendanfan]

Awh no! I thought you would have loads to add but you do know.. its possible to ignore me? who am I kidding… we all know thats impossible

Sorry, I didn't mean to come across as harsh, but frankly I'm shocked that you'd want to make all these changes to yourself. And what's wrong with having brown eyes?

 

[ringwood]

BTW, I'm still kind of on board with you changing your eye color so you don't damage your eyes from always wearing your colored contact lenses. BUT, I haven't looked into it enough to know if it's relatively safe or not IF done my a certified eye doctor.

@CenotaphGirl

Information for both of you, this is a fairly comprehensive article on the subject - https://www.allaboutvision.com/eye-care/cosmetic/eye-color-change-surgery/

Bottom line - "relatively safe" is subjective. If you've got enough money and enough desire to do it (however misplaced that desire may be), then there's a way to get it done. The risks are clear.

 

[user 135671]

@CenotaphGirl

Information for both of you, this is a fairly comprehensive article on the subject - https://www.allaboutvision.com/eye-care/cosmetic/eye-color-change-surgery/

Bottom line - "relatively safe" is subjective. If you've got enough money and enough desire to do it (however misplaced that desire may be), then there's a way to get it done. The risks are clear.

Can they not just give you dead peoples eyes? I want Bowies!

 

[Forgottendanfan]

@CenotaphGirl

Information for both of you, this is a fairly comprehensive article on the subject - https://www.allaboutvision.com/eye-care/cosmetic/eye-color-change-surgery/

Bottom line - "relatively safe" is subjective. If you've got enough money and enough desire to do it (however misplaced that desire may be), then there's a way to get it done. The risks are clear.

The eye thing is what baffles me the most. Why would someone want to change their eye colour? I'm clearly missing something here as I find all eye colours to be equally attractive and intriguing. Plus, having someone mess around with your eyes without good reason sounds like asking for trouble. I'd urge Cenotaph to think very, very carefully about this decision. There are people with severe health problems going under the surgeon's knife because they have no choice, and I don't understand why you 'd put yourself at risk voluntarily, just because you happen to prefer a different eye colour to the one you have.

 

[Forgottendanfan]

Yeah same Finished I spoke to my friends for hours about it and they were like everyone should listen to their body

Your body is not telling you to change your eye colour.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

@CenotaphGirl

Information for both of you, this is a fairly comprehensive article on the subject - https://www.allaboutvision.com/eye-care/cosmetic/eye-color-change-surgery/

Bottom line - "relatively safe" is subjective. If you've got enough money and enough desire to do it (however misplaced that desire may be), then there's a way to get it done. The risks are clear.

Im going to Paris to get it done, I am afraid but i have a virtual consultation on 15th or 16th whichever ones the thursday lol of march…its just that or damage my eyes anyway

The eye thing is what baffles me the most. Why would someone want to change their eye colour? I'm clearly missing something here as I find all eye colours to be equally attractive and intriguing. Plus, having someone mess around with your eyes without good reason sounds like asking for trouble. I'd urge Cenotaph to think very, very carefully about this decision. There are people with severe health problems going under the surgeon's knife because they have no choice, and I don't understand why you 'd put yourself at risk voluntarily, just because you happen to prefer a different eye colour to the one you have.

My eye colour to normal people is okay but to me I see two awful black holes on my face, they scare me, they are just awful on me, I dont particularly see this on anyone else with brown eyes

 

[ringwood]

Im going to Paris to get it done, I am afraid but i have a virtual consultation on 15th or 16th whichever ones the thursday lol of march…its just that or damage my eyes anyway


My eye colour to normal people is okay but to me I see two awful black holes on my face, they scare me, they are just awful on me, I dont particularly see this on anyone else with brown eyes

And this is exactly why I think you need some serious therapy work on how you perceive yourself. I just don't get it - you'd rather undergo a potentially life-altering, permanent surgery and/or wear contacts constantly that will also eventually do damage in order to feel good about yourself. I just can't fathom your mindset. But whatever. . . it's your body. In the end, you need to do what you will, whatever the consequences. I won't say anymore about it. I wish you good luck on your journey of self-discovery and I hope to God that you don't suffer any botched surgeries or permanent disfigurements. Peace. . .

 

[CenotaphGirl]

And this is exactly why I think you need some serious therapy work on how you perceive yourself. I just don't get it - you'd rather undergo a potentially life-altering, permanent surgery and/or wear contacts constantly that will also eventually do damage in order to feel good about yourself. I just can't fathom your mindset. But whatever. . . it's your body. In the end, you need to do what you will, whatever the consequences. I won't say anymore about it. I wish you good luck on your journey of self-discovery and I hope to God that you don't suffer any botched surgeries or permanent disfigurements. Peace. . .

Thanks honestly, I appreciate you finding links and being honest. In all reality im just hoping for one day, the only day of my whole life where I look in the mirror and see the me I can love but who knows I might have nothing but disfigurement awaiting me, I hope I can have just one day

 

[Finished]

And this is exactly why I think you need some serious therapy work on how you perceive yourself. I just don't get it - you'd rather undergo a potentially life-altering, permanent surgery and/or wear contacts constantly that will also eventually do damage in order to feel good about yourself. I just can't fathom your mindset. But whatever. . . it's your body. In the end, you need to do what you will, whatever the consequences. I won't say anymore about it. I wish you good luck on your journey of self-discovery and I hope to God that you don't suffer any botched surgeries or permanent disfigurements. Peace. . .

Obviously the safest thing to do is for Cen to accept her eye color as is. But, I doubt that's going to happen. She is damaging her eyes with constantly wearing contact lenses, which is a very bad thing to do. Atleast with an eye color change she can stop constantly wearing eye contacts altogether. I hope you, Cen, will be content with the outcome and don't continue wearing colored contacs seeking the "perfect" color.

I also agree all eye colors are nice. Sometimes I'm really attracted to dark eyes and dark hair. Other times I'm attracted to blond hair and blue eyes. Overall it's about total appearance. Yet, I am drawn to someone with unussually light eyes. I have one medium blue and one medium bluish green eye. But, they are boring. Only when someone actually looks at them do they see they are different colors. If they were lighter in color they would stand out and be noticed. IMO, Cen wants every part of her to stand out and be noticed.