Recent reflections

[crazymoondance]

As I said in my introduction I'm a 55 year old man - I've had long phases in my life when I was not lonely. The past few years have seen changes in my circumstances, I spend a lot of time alone. This morning I've been pondering the nature of loneliness
...last night I was lost in my thoughts at home whilst quite busy with housework when I realised I didn't feel lonely! The thought of being with a group of people didn't thrill me at all...I've screwed up most things in my life - all I have is a wealth of experience to call on - and this much I know, when it comes to human contact, the rule of quality not quantity must apply! We all know the concept of being lonely in a crowd or a relationship...I guess I'm beginning to see that life is all about self knowledge! As a young man I married the wrong girl - yadda yadda! I see now that like millions of young people I was sold the whole bs package of happy, successful people having loving spouses...I've discovered more about myself and life as a whole during this current period of solitude than I did through years of marriage...sure I know I'll probably suffer the blooms again but right now let me pass on to any young person feeling their life sucks because they are alone, people don't guarantee happiness!

 

[Goblin]

Yes, I do think that's a fairly common misconception: "I don't have people. If I have people, I will be happy instead of unhappy or I can prevent myself from becoming unhappy."

I think that if the blues are caused by not having anyone who cares what happens to you, anyone who treats you like a human being, or by the fact that you may lie in your apartment for weeks after you die before anyone asks where you are, then people may be what's needed. In other cases, it's not so simple.