So I feel terrible...

[annik]

I've kind of gone everywhere I can for support. Sometimes I think it would be better if I just didn't bother. I mean I can feel bad and watch telly or I can feel bad reach out, get overlooked or ignored then feel worse. Right now watching the kiddy tv seems like a better option.

Not my typical post I guess but you know...

 

[Limlim]

watcha need support with? Or is because of the failure to reach out?

 

[mintymint]

*hug*

 

[Kat]

I don't think you have exhausted every place for support, cause I could listen and try to give you support. I'm a semi new member and we haven't spoken yet. Hope you feel better soon.

 

[annik]

watcha need support with? Or is because of the failure to reach out?

I just feel lonely and depressed so I think don't mope send emails join places to talk to people. Then when I do and feel ignored or out of place I just feel worse. Whereas if I'd just stuck to myself and watched silly telly or listened to the Manics I might feel better. Putting yourself out there is kind of a risk.

*hug*

Thanks.

I don't think you have exhausted every place for support, cause I could listen and try to give you support. I'm a semi new member and we haven't spoken yet. Hope you feel better soon.

Thank you thats kind.

 

[meekthoughts]

You aren't being ignored here. Is there any particular reason why you feel terrible right now? Or maybe you want to rant? We're here to listen.

 

[Peter Lorre]

I'm sorry you feel this way. I wish I could help you out, but I'm here if you need someone to listen.

Take care, hope things will improve for you soon

 

[annik]

You aren't being ignored here. Is there any particular reason why you feel terrible right now? Or maybe you want to rant? We're here to listen.

That's true I feel ignored more by the couple of people I actually know. On forums I tend to just sometimes feel a bit overlooked or like a don't fit in. I joined a book forum for instance because I love reading and everyone seemed to love sci fi and horror and they are pretty much the only two things I don't read .

I'm not really prone to ranting or outbursts, perhaps this is why I feel a bit overlooked at times I don't know.

I'm just generally down I guess.

I'm sorry you feel this way. I wish I could help you out, but I'm here if you need someone to listen.

Take care, hope things will improve for you soon

Thank you thats really nice of you.

 

[Kat]

Don't give up. It's just a coincidence. Try a different book forum or try a forum about something else you like to do. Just try a different group of people. It is risky to put yourself out there..it might work or it might not. But you can count on it being lonely if you don't.

 

[annik]

Don't give up. It's just a coincidence. Try a different book forum or try a forum about something else you like to do. Just try a different group of people. It is risky to put yourself out there..it might work or it might not. But you can count on it being lonely if you don't.

You're probably right. I just suck big time at fitting in most of the time. Or even just having stuff in common with people.

I think it depends on when I put myself out there really. I should just do it to pass the time when I'm feeling ok but I don't I tend to try these things when I feel down or lonely so I'm more prone to ended up feeling worse.

 

[silver birch leaves]

stupid as it sounds and as I am, oxford is missing you. I can only hope that I'm not making you feel even worse...

 

[annik]

stupid as it sounds and as I am, oxford is missing you. I can only hope that I'm not making you feel even worse...

Not worse, though wondering.

 

[silver birch leaves]

stupid as it sounds and as I am, oxford is missing you. I can only hope that I'm not making you feel even worse...

Not worse, though wondering.

My comment was off topic, but my intentions were good. I have a strange way of expressing sympathy :/

 

[DreamerDeceiver]

I'm terribly sorry to hear what you're going through right now, annik. I really wish there was a way I could help you. I believe you deserve better than this. It sounds like you've been trying hard to reach out to people everywhere despite of the odds. From what I see, you are strong and determined to find a place outside of your world to fit in, these aren't easy risks to take and I admire your courage so far; don't let the disappointment in others crush your momentum. Realise you have really shown yourself to be a wonderful and interesting person here. I would definitely like to hang around someone like you and I'm sure others feel the same. There are people out there who care about you and will listen to you. Don't give up, you are not alone, and you have not failed. Do take care.

 

[Thomas]]

annik;

What are your favourite novels ? =] I really love reading... I used to read so much more before internet came about though =x

And keep your head up. Things will always get better if you believe in yourself!

Probably sounds kind of naive of me and easy to say, but I think DreamerDeceiver is right. Don't be hard on yourself =x

 

[annik]

I'm terribly sorry to hear what you're going through right now, annik. I really wish there was a way I could help you. I believe you deserve better than this. It sounds like you've been trying hard to reach out to people everywhere despite of the odds. From what I see, you are strong and determined to find a place outside of your world to fit in, these aren't easy risks to take and I admire your courage so far; don't let the disappointment in others crush your momentum. Realise you have really shown yourself to be a wonderful and interesting person here. I would definitely like to hang around someone like you and I'm sure others feel the same. There are people out there who care about you and will listen to you. Don't give up, you are not alone, and you have not failed. Do take care.

Oh thank you so much that really means so much to me. I do think I get discouraged quite easily but I won't give up on trying to reach out. Though sometimes, as I was saying in my post, I think I should recognize my own capacity it make myself feel better. Because its there. I think when we are lonely and / or down we think the best and right thing is to look for people to talk to or people to make us feel better. When this doesn't work its easy to feel worse. I know the things that will make me smile so sometimes I should do them and rely on myself and then when I feel better I should seek out the company because then if it's not there maybe I won't feel so bad. Wow sorry that sentence ended up quite long.

I have noticed too though that when you are lonely it seems to be the worse thing to tell people. If I send an email saying I'm lonely or down I tend to get a frosty reply or none at all. Whereas if I just send something chatty I tend to get a good reply. Weird.

annik;

What are your favourite novels ? =] I really love reading... I used to read so much more before internet came about though =x

And keep your head up. Things will always get better if you believe in yourself!

Probably sounds kind of naive of me and easy to say, but I think DreamerDeceiver is right. Don't be hard on yourself =x

Thanks I am feeling a bit better today so I know what you mean.

Oh well I love a lot of books Some classics like Jane Eyre, Wuthering Heights, The Woman In White. I love Virginia Woolf and Sylvia Plath too. I've lost count of how many times I've read The Bell Jar. The hours is a great book and the short story The Yellow Wallpaper is amazing. Though actually I'm more passionate about poetry.

 

[Thomas]]

Oh wow, some real classics in there which I am still yet to get around to reading =x

I really like poetry too. I've been on stage to read some of my poetry work when I was younger... I felt so nerdy at the time xD

Do you write?

 

[annik]

Oh wow, some real classics in there which I am still yet to get around to reading =x

I really like poetry too. I've been on stage to read some of my poetry work when I was younger... I felt so nerdy at the time xD

Do you write?

It took me a while to get round to reading anything remotely Austin or Bronte but in the end I liked it. I only bought Pride and Prejudice after reading the & Zombies version, which is also great in a kind of trashy way.

Wow thats not nerdy at all thats so cool I do write poetry yeap, not as much as I used to. I used to post alot on my old myspace (remember that?!) and I almost wet myself when Patrick Jones (poet and playwright) commented on it and liked it. I've gone the publishing way too but only ended up getting it in a few girl / fanzines...hmm I miss fanzines.

Whose poetry do you like / read?

 

[Anonymous Rex]

I just feel lonely and depressed so I think don't mope send emails join places to talk to people. Then when I do and feel ignored or out of place I just feel worse. Whereas if I'd just stuck to myself and watched silly telly or listened to the Manics I might feel better. Putting yourself out there is kind of a risk.

I tend to feel the same, it's really difficult to feel like the odd one out. I've been along to things where I've felt out of place, and there's a few social groups I'm sort of on the edge of - for instance there's a writing group I joined when it first started up a year and a half ago, and there's quite a few of the regulars click together naturally in a way I don't, for the most part.
Hard to know what to say that's encouraging, other than that I know how you feel.

You're probably right. I just suck big time at fitting in most of the time. Or even just having stuff in common with people.

I get anxious thinking about what other people will be interested in - I go through spells when I think the things I'm interested in will be boring to everyone else, but it can be surprising when you sometimes click with someone over an interest you wouldn't have thought you had in common.

I actually came to this thread after seeing your posts in two other threads, seeing we had a few things in common, and looking through your other posts (sorry if that seems stalkerish, by the way...) and I'm sure there'll be plenty of other people who like the Manics, Oasis and Gene Wilder, not to mention whatever other interests you have.

I totally know how you feel, and feel the same quite often, so don't want to talk down your problems, but i think we quite often have more in common with people than we expect.

 

[Thomas]]

It took me a while to get round to reading anything remotely Austin or Bronte but in the end I liked it. I only bought Pride and Prejudice after reading the & Zombies version, which is also great in a kind of trashy way.

Wow thats not nerdy at all thats so cool I do write poetry yeap, not as much as I used to. I used to post alot on my old myspace (remember that?!) and I almost wet myself when Patrick Jones (poet and playwright) commented on it and liked it. I've gone the publishing way too but only ended up getting it in a few girl / fanzines...hmm I miss fanzines.

Whose poetry do you like / read?

Wow that's really impressive annik! Well done!

I should really get around to reading the classics.. I bet I'm missing out on so much =x

I actually really like edgar allan poe's work. A little chilling and strange with some of the things he writes, but he's so original and interesting to read. And his famous line "Deep into that darkness peering.... long I stood there... wondering...fearing...doubting". It creates so much suspense! He was really good at communicating his feelings and creating the mood.

I also like quite a few of Shakespeare's pieces, and Simon Armitage.

Shakespeare inspired me to write my own sonnet once in 10 minutes... I think it's one of the better pieces I've written, and maybe I'll post it when I'm feeling a little more confident =x

Do you have any writing you'd like to share? I'd love to see some!