The Nice Guy Curse

[Fustar]

I agree guys. I wish more men did. Maybe you two should hook up and start holding some classes on how to be gentleman

I wonder how many would take that class, might just have to force it on them. I preach quite a bit about being a gentlemen as it is.

 

[Iceman1978]

I agree guys. I wish more men did. Maybe you two should hook up and start holding some classes on how to be gentleman

Or we could put them in the military. Basic will wear them down, then build them back up and in two years they'll at least be more responsible.

LOL

 

[Fustar]

marine core for sure lol then some special ops if that doesn't work

I agree guys. I wish more men did. Maybe you two should hook up and start holding some classes on how to be gentleman

Or we could put them in the military. Basic will wear them down, then build them back up and in two years they'll at least be more responsible.

LOL

marine corps for sure lol then some special ops if that doesn't work

 

[Iceman1978]

[video=youtube]

What'll I Do is, in my opinion, one of the most romantic songs ever written. Bea Arthur just lights up the entire room when she sings.

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marine core for sure lol then some special ops if that doesn't work

I agree guys. I wish more men did. Maybe you two should hook up and start holding some classes on how to be gentleman

Or we could put them in the military. Basic will wear them down, then build them back up and in two years they'll at least be more responsible.

LOL

marine corps for sure lol then some special ops if that doesn't work

Coast Guard

 

[blackdot]

Now, one thing I will not do is buy flowers. I just don't see dead plants as being romantic.
If someone wants flowers they can just come to my house since I have plenty in the flower beds at home.

In terms of paying for the date, the date I went on last week I did ask if she wanted the bill to be separate or not. She said she would pay her's instead of me doing it. Still ended up with the same result but still...

 

[organicNYgirl]

Keep preaching Fustar Even if you only influence one person it's worth it

 

[Iceman1978]

[video=youtube]

One of the best. I've seen Chris Botti in concert. Paula Cole is simply breathtaking on the vocals.

[video=youtube]

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Now, one thing I will not do is buy flowers. I just don't see dead plants as being romantic.
If someone wants flowers they can just come to my house since I have plenty in the flower beds at home.

In terms of paying for the date, the date I went on last week I did ask if she wanted the bill to be separate or not. She said she would pay her's instead of me doing it. Still ended up with the same result but still...

I've got a nice garden in my backyard as well. A lot of people don't like yard work, but I find it very relaxing. I guess I get my love of landscaping from my parents. We always had fresh cut flowers in the house.

 

[robberrt]

Then there's the fashion industry. Marilyn Monroe, arguably one of the most beautiful women of her generation, wore a size 12 dress and would be considered overweight by today's standards. Today they've set such an unrealistic expectation that a woman needs to look malnourished in order to be considered "thin."

I agree. It's a shame that so many women associate being beautiful with being skeleton thin. I love it when women have curves! Haha

 

[Fustar]

Keep preaching Fustar Even if you only influence one person it's worth it

Oh I will, Its kinda something I can't help but do.

Then there's the fashion industry. Marilyn Monroe, arguably one of the most beautiful women of her generation, wore a size 12 dress and would be considered overweight by today's standards. Today they've set such an unrealistic expectation that a woman needs to look malnourished in order to be considered "thin."

I agree. It's a shame that so many women associate being beautiful with being skeleton thin. I love it when women have curves! Haha

I think we need to get back to being people, everyone is different. Putting labels on what is beautiful and whats not isn't for society to do. I would rather women look like they take care of their body, and not just starve themselves. Also men are under a lot of pressure to be ripped and that takes a lot of gym time, time most of us don't have. Don't let famous people dictate what you do with your body, be the way you want to be. Don't let trends sway your health.

 

[Iceman1978]

I think we need to get back to being people, everyone is different. Putting labels on what is beautiful and whats not isn't for society to do. I would rather women look like they take care of their body, and not just starve themselves. Also men are under a lot of pressure to be ripped and that takes a lot of gym time, time most of us don't have. Don't let famous people dictate what you do with your body, be the way you want to be. Don't let trends sway your health.

I agree. Even though I spend a lot of time in the gym, but I do so to improve my own health and not to conform to what the media says guys are supposed to look like.

Well...maybe a little.

But I have no desire to look like one of the pro-wrestlers (psst..it's fake) or the guys in the UFC. I know that some women just go nuts over men like that, but that's not me and it will never be me.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Here's a bit of sage advice.
If you invite someone out, pay for it. It's that simple.
If I invite someone out, I pay for it. Even when it's friends or family. It really is that simple.

 

[Coeur]

Same with me. I'm old school when it comes to dating. I still believe in picking up the tab

I've had multiple women I have gone out with get upset with me for paying the tab for the first date.
I really just have no clue what it is women want. Even when I do something nice, it pisses them off.

Really?? They get upset because you insist on paying?

I'd be pretty upset if someone I didn't know insisted on buying me things even after I'd politely turned down the offer. The values I was raised with are completely different from the values that say a man should give a woman things just because.

Sometimes people buying something for strangers is nice. One time at a coffee shop someone spilled their coffee and someone got them a new one. It's different in a dating scenario because it's not a random act of kindness, it's an investment in something that may or may not be at that point and if someone doesn't share those "courting" values it puts them on the spot. It's a little bit like if one of the breeders I talked to while looking for a bird insisted on giving me a fancy birdcage, some fine food, homemade toys, etc, to be a good businessperson before I'd decided whether or not I wanted their bird.

Maybe some people would love the free stuff, but I'd feel self-conscious about all the goods I was taking, in good will or not, from someone clearly hoping we'd close the deal in the future when it was still quite possible I'd wind up with one of someone else's birds. To me, turning all that down is courtesy and good sense, not a disdain for generosity or any such thing.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Same with me. I'm old school when it comes to dating. I still believe in picking up the tab

I've had multiple women I have gone out with get upset with me for paying the tab for the first date.
I really just have no clue what it is women want. Even when I do something nice, it pisses them off.

Really?? They get upset because you insist on paying?

Yes. I get upset.

I have this guy friend that ALWAYS pays for everything when we do stuff together.

The last time He did this I glared at him, because he wouldn't let me pay when i offered.

It makes me intensely uncomfortable when guys pay for stuff because I feel like I am taking advantage of them.

 

[Fustar]

I can see how a woman could get upset, especially if she insist on helping with the check. However I think the guy should pay if he was the one that asked the girl out. Just Paying for things because your hanging out with a woman is a bad approach anyways, makes you seem like your trying too hard, or that paying for everything is your way of feeling manly. A date that I asked for, I should pay, anything else discuss and agree on how it will be settled.

 

[Sci-Fi]

I had a female friend who always insisted on paying for me, it ticked me off. But she had an anterior motive to it and I wanted to avoid that. I wouldn't argue with her, if she insisted on paying I let it slide for the sake of getting into an argument and have hurt feelings.

As for a first date, I thought the new rule of thumb was you each pay for yourself.

It should never end up in an argument though, if someone wants to pay for their own just let them. It might be okay to offer a second time to pay but if they don't agree a second time you let it go.

 

[blackdot]

you know, if I didn't pay for the bill then the women would be just as angry that I didn't offer to pay her bill.
It really is a lose/lose situation.

 

[EveWasFramed]

you know, if I didn't pay for the bill then the women would be just as angry that I didn't offer to pay her bill.
It really is a lose/lose situation.

You must hang out with some odd people, blackdot.

As I said before...whoever does the inviting should pay. It's just good manners.

 

[Fustar]

you know, if I didn't pay for the bill then the women would be just as angry that I didn't offer to pay her bill.
It really is a lose/lose situation.

You must hang out with some odd people, blackdot.

As I said before...whoever does the inviting should pay. It's just good manners.

Agree, on both accounts!

 

[blackdot]

I guess manners are not being taught these days.

 

[Fustar]

I guess manners are not being taught these days.

And that would be the biggest problem everyone faces. Especially those of us who do use manners, and try to care about others.