the Problem of Sex w/o Commitment

[user 188644]

No, I think all men want meaningless sex, especially the ones that say they don't lol.

However, what is polluting the dating pool may be geographical? I think the dating pool looks so different everywhere even city to city let alone country to country. For example, a large portion of American men complain to me that American women are just "impossible", so they hope to find a wife overseas. Looking for a wife overseas is not as popular here in the UK, but my research shows it's a huge movement in the US.

Maybe you mean they wish they could? But like lots of people "want" things they don't actually want. Something you actually want you go for. People who want to be thin/fit don't just hope they wake up thin, but most if not all overweight people want to be thin. People who want it go for it. Wishing is romanticizing without considering the down sides, the hard and or scary parts. So yea maybe the guys who say they don't want meaningless sex aren't saying it with 100% conviction but I think most of them really don't. If they were different people they may actually want it.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I don't think anybody wants sex, I think everyone wants money and power, and sex just happens to be the most common public transportation to these things. Except for the inexperienced, who confuse sexual relations with emotional relations and cannot differentiate between the two (those are the people who usually get swallowed like fish in a shark pool in the dating pool).

But apparently I'm not supposed to just call that out like that.
The dating pool bores me because predictability bores me.
I have video games and a bi-weekly paycheck for predictability.

You lost me at nobody wants sex? Lool

Maybe you mean they wish they could? But like lots of people "want" things they don't actually want. Something you actually want you go for. People who want to be thin/fit don't just hope they wake up thin, but most if not all overweight people want to be thin. People who want it go for it. Wishing is romanticizing without considering the down sides, the hard and or scary parts. So yea maybe the guys who say they don't want meaningless sex aren't saying it with 100% conviction but I think most of them really don't. If they were different people they may actually want it.

Yes yes yes, I mean like... show me a man that would say no... Like I always make the argument to my bro that women say things like "I wouldn't touch you off you was the last man on earth" but you'll be hard pressed to find a man who would say the opposite lol men are just different in that way. I dont know what its like to be a man but I think, do they really want to be loved and all this crap?

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Maybe you mean they wish they could? But like lots of people "want" things they don't actually want. Something you actually want you go for. People who want to be thin/fit don't just hope they wake up thin, but most if not all overweight people want to be thin. People who want it go for it. Wishing is romanticizing without considering the down sides, the hard and or scary parts. So yea maybe the guys who say they don't want meaningless sex aren't saying it with 100% conviction but I think most of them really don't. If they were different people they may actually want it.

I had a realization when I was about 24 or so, around 10 years ago.
That realization is that life moves incredibly fast, so fast that unless you downshift you almost don't notice it and it's easy to put your right foot over your left and then try to turn right. Next thing you know you're down and thinking "What the ****? How did this happen to me?"

It happens to both men and women, as a result of our over-stimulation. Effectively, most people have what I call "Half Thoughts," or rather that the longevity of the thought isn't completed, because that takes too much time and patience, and life wants us to go-go-go, so we end up in those situations by making estimations on what is effectively half of that data, or an assumption of a situation on half of the whole spectrum of understanding of a situation.

Or to put it in automotive terms:
If you've got a short in your ground cable and you never think to test for it, you're just going to have to keep replacing your alternator and battery because of the drag from the short.

 

[user 188644]

You lost me at nobody wants sex? Lool

Yes yes yes, I mean like... show me a man that would say no... Like I always make the argument to my bro that women say things like "I wouldn't touch you off you was the last man on earth" but you'll be hard pressed to find a man who would say the opposite lol men are just different in that way. I dont know what its like to be a man but I think, do they really want to be loved and all this crap?

There are definitely women I am not attracted to in any way that I would say no to. Both sexes can have physical reactions that go against what they want. Neither is consent.

Of course men want to be loved. I think believing that makes it far easier to not care about his wants needs and feelings. Not saying that's specifically you but the women who do in general. Toughness isn't caring about nothing. It's caring about things and dealing with the pain that comes with it. Any aloof tough guys you know are the most emotionally scared mother fuckers you know. Putting on a facade to hide from pain.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

There are definitely women I am not attracted to in any way that I would say no to. Both sexes can have physical reactions that go against what they want. Neither is consent.

Of course men want to be loved. I think believing that makes it far easier to not care about his wants needs and feelings. Not saying that's specifically you but the women who do in general. Toughness isn't caring about nothing. It's caring about things and dealing with the pain that comes with it. Any aloof tough guys you know are the most emotionally scared mother fuckers you know. Putting on a facade to hide from pain.

Put it this way... if I waked into a mens prison... I expect every straight man to say yes, simples. I would bet my life on it with no hesitation, and its nothing to do with how good or not I look just simple science we've all been taught to ignore. But hey, thats just my humble opinion.

See now men wanting to be loved, like over meaningless hook ups with various women, I didn't know that was a real thing. I thought most guys dream was women on rotation and living a bachelors life style. You know?

 

[user 188644]

I had a realization when I was about 24 or so, around 10 years ago.
That realization is that life moves incredibly fast, so fast that unless you downshift you almost don't notice it and it's easy to put your right foot over your left and then try to turn right. Next thing you know you're down and thinking "What the ****? How did this happen to me?"

It happens to both men and women, as a result of our over-stimulation. Effectively, most people have what I call "Half Thoughts," or rather that the longevity of the thought isn't completed, because that takes too much time and patience, and life wants us to go-go-go, so we end up in those situations by making estimations on what is effectively half of that data, or an assumption of a situation on half of the whole spectrum of understanding of a situation.

Or to put it in automotive terms:
If you've got a short in your ground cable and you never think to test for it, you're just going to have to keep replacing your alternator and battery because of the drag from the short.

The whole making decisions without information is like the most natural thing. Is this food, is that snake dangerous etc. The skillset is the same the situations have just gotten more complicated and known.

It is interesting you can do everything wrong and never figure out what you're doing wrong. If you don't know to test for it you wont. I think in that sense it's just luck. Luck that you run into someone who knows what your problem is and can point it out. I think guidance counselors, life coaches and phycologists are professions we desperately need and need more of and as a social service. Sure humanity could go on the way it is but why?

There are lots of people "half assing things" Well half assing in the sense that they aren't putting in 10,000 hours to things. Is it half assing if you try to stick with something for the sake of sticking to something even if you don't like it? I think most of us never find our 10,000 hour meaningful things. They think they want the things other people want. The effort isn't there because the desire isn't. We are in this weird place in developed nations where the desperation to survive isn't there anymore but the desire to thrive eludes many of us.

 

[user 188644]

Put it this way... if I waked into a mens prison... I expect every straight man to say yes, simples. I would bet my life on it with no hesitation, and its nothing to do with how good or not I look just simple science we've all been taught to ignore. But hey, thats just my humble opinion.

See now men wanting to be loved, like over meaningless hook ups with various women, I didn't know that was a real thing. I thought most guys dream was women on rotation and living a bachelors life style. You know?

There's a lot of satisfaction in learning about someone's body and what works and what doesn't. If you take all of the humanness out of casual encounters and you're no longer nervous or scared and just completely free sure a long line of attractive women throwing themselves at us would be amazing. There's just so many details being left out.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

The whole making decisions without information is like the most natural thing. Is this food, is that snake dangerous etc. The skillset is the same the situations have just gotten more complicated and known.

It is interesting you can do everything wrong and never figure out what you're doing wrong. If you don't know to test for it you wont. I think in that sense it's just luck. Luck that you run into someone who knows what your problem is and can point it out. I think guidance counselors, life coaches and phycologists are professions we desperately need and need more of and as a social service. Sure humanity could go on the way it is but why?

There are lots of people "half assing things" Well half assing in the sense that they aren't putting in 10,000 hours to things. Is it half assing if you try to stick with something for the sake of sticking to something even if you don't like it? I think most of us never find our 10,000 hour meaningful things. They think they want the things other people want. The effort isn't there because the desire isn't. We are in this weird place in developed nations where the desperation to survive isn't there anymore but the desire to thrive eludes many of us.

Bingo. See, that's the thing. If you just eat whatever, and you eat the wrong whatever, you end up as a story on 1,000 Ways To Die or in The Darwin Awards.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Bingo. See, that's the thing. If you just eat whatever, and you eat the wrong whatever, you end up as a story on 1,000 Ways To Die or in The Darwin Awards.

Seen the guy who died eating left over pasta !?!? I didnt even know that was a thing

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Seen the guy who died eating left over pasta !?!? I didnt even know that was a thing

Also an episode with a hiker who decided he wanted to go out into the forest where there is no cell phone signal and go off trail camping so that he could find the hallucinogenic frog and lick the back of it so he could trip. Welp, he licked the wrong frog. Died of poisonous paralysis. RIP.

 

[4No1]

No sex - no problem ))

In fact, I see 2:
1. It causes pregnancy
2. It causes emotional attachment

Sex w/o commitment can transform to a sex with unwanted commitment

 

[ardour]

Those kinds of men exist almost exclusively online and only affect women who need attention for their self esteem. The woman isn't attracted and her looks make her ego too big to realize she's just as much if not more of a loser than he is.

It isn't limited to onlyfans idiots. Men with low self-esteem commonly pursue women who are clearly out of their league or over-invest early on. The reasoning goes something like if I can make this one attractive woman like me then that'll balance out a lifetime of rejection.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

It isn't limited to onlyfans idiots. Men with low self-esteem commonly pursue women who are clearly out of their league or over-invest early on. The reasoning goes something like if I can make this one attractive woman like me then that'll balance out a lifetime of rejection.

Amen! This is sad but true, soooo trueeee and if I say it as a woman I look bad, when a guy says it… it comes across less like bragging, but its not even flattering its just sooo sad.

 

[Finished]

I don't know, maybe experience would have allowed me to move on instead of still finding 22 year old's attractive like some creepy old *******. I still have a preference for monogamy though and the idea of hooking up then bumping into them again seems horribly awkward. "Oh, hi, er.. how's it going?"

22 year olds are attractive! You shouldn't feel wrong for that. That's why all the ultra old guys give them thousands of dollars to be their sugar daddies. That's creepy. But, so what if it is?

I agree that monogamy is better. And.... bumping into them again is awkard until you've done it a bunch from what I've heard. I imagine two meeting up for a hookup and saying, "Oh, it's you again? Didn't we see each other a couple months ago? Stop talking so much! You did that last time too." Ha! ha!

 

[user 188644]

w

It isn't limited to onlyfans idiots. Men with low self-esteem commonly pursue women who are clearly out of their league or over-invest early on. The reasoning goes something like if I can make this one attractive woman like me then that'll balance out a lifetime of rejection.

Bro everything you say is consistently ********.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

22 year olds are attractive! You shouldn't feel wrong for that. That's why all the ultra old guys give them thousands of dollars to be their sugar daddies. That's creepy. But, so what if it is?

I agree that monogamy is better. And.... bumping into them again is awkard until you've done it a bunch from what I've heard. I imagine two meeting up for a hookup and saying, "Oh, it's you again? Didn't we see each other a couple months ago? Stop talking so much! You did that last time too." Ha! ha!

Sugar daddy buys me everything I wanttt all I have to do is pretend his stories about the war are interesting fair is fair

 

[dan27]

 

[Finished]

I just feel like a man should want to be intimate with women they don't care about, but it may have be due to the programming. I grew up hearing that it makes a man a better father and husband later in life if they spend some years sleeping around like dogs lmao. I cant lie, sometimes I wonder if thats why men are becoming slightly obsessed with women, trying their best to feel something they dont feel to justify wanting to sleep with them? All the tattoos and branding sounds like a point to prove to me... maybe... idk.. you guys are men, you tell me lol.

You mean like sowing their oats? There is atleast some truth to that. If a guy has been out there doing his thing he'll realize that women are more then a hot box with hair. Less emphasis will be put on sex. Usually by the time a player gets married he's played out.

 

[user 139760]

No, I think all men want meaningless sex, especially the ones that say they don't lol.

What about the guys who actually refuse meaningless sex when offered? Doesn't that conflict with your world views, kid?

 

[CenotaphGirl]

You mean like sowing their oats? There is atleast some truth to that. If a guy has been out there doing his thing he'll realize that women are more then a hot box with hair. Less emphasis will be put on sex. Usually by the time a player gets married he's played out.

Yeahh this is what I grew up hearing men say lol

What about the guys who actually refuse meaningless sex when offered? Doesn't that conflict with your world views, kid?

You mean… Men… refuse… ? Since when?!? Must be due to evolution or something, didnt know that was possible