This is why I hate everything

[Nicolelt]

I'm just going to put this under miscellaneous because I just need to vent.

Most of you know, I'm a teacher. And in my state we get evaluated on a 1 to 4 scale. 1 being ineffective, 2 is needs improvement, 3 is effective, and 4 is highly effective. They grade you on 3 domains, 1 is lesson planning for class, 2 is when they are in the classroom watching you teach, and 3 is leadership like do you communicate with parents and get into school stuff etc.

So today was the day I got my evaluation for the school year. We go through domain 1, and I get all 3's on those standards, even though I told my evaluator I didn't feel that way, but you know, he's the boss, and if he thinks I'm a 3, I'm a 3. We skip domain 2, because he grades that when he is in class with me and I get a 3 in that as well. Then for teacher leadership I get 3's and 4's in that area because I work my butt off for that school. So overall, I get the score of 3.15 which is an improvement from last year's 2.8. I should be happy, right?

Well, I feel like ****, because of the last part of my evaluation we had to set goals for me for next year. He told me I need to improve my classroom management, which I totally get. I do in fact need to crack down on my kids, and I have a plan for next year. But what got me was that he told me he had "heard" that I wasn't fair. That I wasn't consistent and couldn't control my classes. He heard this from kids that I wrote up. He got this information before he ever stepped foot in my classroom. And he straight up said, "I didn't know what to expect going into your class." and that he was "pleasantly surprised with my teaching."

I am really offended by that. He went into my classroom with a negative outlook? If he has this impression of me, what do others think? The fact he acted shocked that I actually do my job correctly is just eating at me. I want to cry.

To top off my terrible feeling I wrote a kid up today. I hate write ups, but this one had to happen. Students are not allowed to leave the classroom without the teacher's knowledge. I have no problem with a kid asking to go to the bathroom or locker and getting a pass from me, but this kid just got up and left my room! I had no idea where he was! It's a safety concern so I wrote him up, and he was punished by the principal.

Now this mother of a student is emailing telling me that it was okay that he left my room. Uhhhhh, no.

I am taking a sick day tomorrow, I can't deal with this.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Now see, if this kid had truly disappeared, the mother would be blaming you for not watching him and knowing where he was at. I'd tell her to take it up with principal and that it's out of my hands. He left when he shouldn't have, and if I had done that while in school, I'm sure my mom would have given me an earful. This mother just sounds like another one of those parents that believe their kids can do no wrong. Reasons why I can't stand most kids.

You sound like a fine teacher, so don't let any ******* make you feel otherwise.

 

[Nicolelt]

Now see, if this kid had truly disappeared, the mother would be blaming you for not watching him and knowing where he was at. I'd tell her to take it up with principal and that it's out of my hands. He left when he shouldn't have, and if I had done that while in school, I'm sure my mom would have given me an earful. This mother just sounds like another one of those parents that believe their kids can do no wrong. Reasons why I can't stand most kids.

You sound like a fine teacher, so don't let any ******* make you feel otherwise.

She emailed me again after I explaining that if he was to stay in the classroom, he would have gotten in a fight. He's an 18 year old, come on. You can't control yourself or tell me that you need to leave? Ugh. This is going to keep me up all night. I hate this stuff.

 

[SofiasMami]

Aw, I think you're being way too hard on yourself, Nicolelt! It sounds like you're doing a good job. When the evaluator said he was pleasantly surprised, maybe he had just done other evaluations that didn't go so well and was happy to see a teacher doing well? If he really did have a negative outlook, that's on him, not you.

As for the parent who complained about her kid's write-up - she's barking up the wrong tree. She needs to complain to her kid about his bad behavior, not kill the messenger. Sounds like the principal backed you up too.
I have a young child in school and I want her to do well but you better believe she will hear it from me if I hear she behaved poorly in school. Not acceptable. (She actually got a "citation" last year in 2nd grade for misbehaving and we had a discussion and she was ashamed about her behavior, that was the first and last formal reprimand she's gotten in school, thankfully.)

So go to work and hold your head up high, I think you're doing just fine!

-Teresa

 

[ladyforsaken]

Nicole, what can I say? I went through exactly what you went through when I was teaching. Hell, 18 year olds can do the stupidest things and their parents will still back them up. They could murder another kid and their parents would likely still back them up. That truly sucks but I think more and more of it is happening. There's just no freaking decency anymore.

As for your boss, he's a dick. I know that all too well. You know what I did when my HOD doubted my teaching capabilities? I told her off. I gave her a list of all the things I would do in the classroom and question her if she can do the same or better in my classes. I asked her to take over for a day so I could observe her if she thinks I can't do my job when she hasn't even seen or evaluated me by herself. It's so ******** I couldn't take all of that and I couldn't let them walk all over me anyhow they wanted to either.

Eventually after my 2nd year in that horrible school with such horrible management and superiors, I wanted to be transferred out cos I just couldn't take it - the Principal wouldn't let me. I requested for a transfer twice. Both times rejected, with the reason of not having enough staff. Not enough staff my ass. Eventually, after my 5th year, I just quit - last year. I love teaching, I love working with teens most of the time, but I think I'd have a problem with the management in schools so if I were to ever teach again, it would be in a place that's got decent management and teachers' support or just private tutoring.

I'm sorry you had to go through that. You take that sick day and feel better. Hope you hang in there, Nicole.

 

[Oldyoung]

Bad management can ruin any job. In that respect I'm very lucky with mine.

Sorry to hear about your experience, LadyF.

Try to shrug it off Nicole. They're being difficult, while you seem to do alright.

 

[Nicolelt]

Thanks for your support guys, it truly makes me feel better.

I got up this morning to another mean email, which I guess my response to the mother was satisfactory, because all she sent next was "Thank You". My principal told me to have her email him.

I slept the rest of the day and then went out with my boyfriend for a few hours and had fun. But now, here I am, dwelling on this. I need to figure out a way to get over things like this quickly. I'm sure it's comes with experience.

 

[Iina]

Hi Nicolelt, I'm a teacher as well and your post brought back my memories from last year. Right now I'm working at a nice private language school and everything is fine. But last school year I was in a public school teaching teenagers and I hated it.

I had severe discipline problems with most of my classes. I understand it was my fault because I didn't have much experience yet, so I just didn't know how to handle difficult situations with the students. Actually, I didn't even know the school disciplinary rules (especially the unspoken ones) when I started working there. Often enough my students got to correct me: "You can't do that, the school rules say blah-blah-blah...". When situations escalated and I had to send a student to one of the principals, only one of the three principals would support me. The two others would always pick the student's (and their parents') side (or just do nothing) - how I'm supposed to teach in these conditions?? I tried to fix these problems asking my co-workers for help but I didn't get much support, so I just suffered alone. All the stress lead to sleep problems and illnesses and a light depression. It was the worst year of my life.

Oh, and we too had this annual teacher evaluation. At the beginning of the school year I had to write down my goals for this year: how I would improve my teaching. But I was forced to pick too large goals - things that I knew I wouldn't be able to accomplish. "Luckily", my school was so unorganised at the end of the school year that nobody really cared about these goals and all the principals just skipped the teacher evaluation. Wow. I'm thankful that I left that sinking ship before it would suck me into the bottom of the ocean.

You told that your boss had "heard" that you weren't fair. Do you know how he got that information? Did he actively ask (one of) your students? Or did the kids come to him to "tell on you"? At some point last year I found out that my co-worker had asked my students how my classes are, what we do and so on. I was shocked! Why couldn't she just ask me?? I would have loved to tell her what we are dealing with and what problems I had. Now the students just got the picture that there is no unity or honest communication among the teachers.

I don't know how your boss usually communicates, but I wouldn't take his comments so hard. Maybe he was in a bad mood or indeed had had many bad reviews before yours. Or maybe he has a bad self-esteem and tried to tease you. The important thing is that he was pleased to see what you do. You are doing fine.

Nicolelt, I think that your profession is one of the most important ones in the society. Teachers, especially pre-school and elementary school teachers, deserve huge respect. You know you did the right thing writing that kid up. You were following the rules. The mother is blinded by her kid, try not to worry about her. You are the professional here.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Sorry to hear about your experience, LadyF.

Thanks, OY.

I got up this morning to another mean email, which I guess my response to the mother was satisfactory, because all she sent next was "Thank You". My principal told me to have her email him.

I slept the rest of the day and then went out with my boyfriend for a few hours and had fun. But now, here I am, dwelling on this. I need to figure out a way to get over things like this quickly. I'm sure it's comes with experience.

There can never be pleasing this woman. I just hope your Principal does not go with the "parents are always right" mindset. That's so screwed up if that's the case.

It's not worth your time and energy to dwell on this, so I hope you managed to find some distractions or things that could get your mind off of this.

Right now I'm working at a nice private language school and everything is fine. But last school year I was in a public school teaching teenagers and I hated it.

I'm really glad switching to a private school helped you - I've always thought about it for myself but haven't given that a shot.

I tried to fix these problems asking my co-workers for help but I didn't get much support, so I just suffered alone. All the stress lead to sleep problems and illnesses and a light depression. It was the worst year of my life.

I cannot tell you how much this speaks for me too back then. I was often sick and I had so much work anxiety it really killed a huge part of me. Sorry to hear you go through it yourself.

Nicolelt, I think that your profession is one of the most important ones in the society. Teachers, especially pre-school and elementary school teachers, deserve huge respect. You know you did the right thing writing that kid up. You were following the rules. The mother is blinded by her kid, try not to worry about her. You are the professional here.

Gotta agree with you here.