Who thinks this site is becoming too dysfunctional

[WishIWereA]

And so the "Who thinks this site is becoming too dysfunctional" threat about being off-topic became off-topic

 

[Estreen]

And so the "Who thinks this site is becoming too dysfunctional" threat about being off-topic became off-topic

Haha. :3

 

[Wyrm]

It's great to know about and speak with others who are feeling the same way as you. It's almost impossible to find someone in person who also feels lonely or otherwise similar to you. Although talking to people online isn't the same as in real life, it's 100x better than not having anyone to talk to.

From reading a lot of the posts here, it helps to see that there are others going through hardships similar to mine. If you ask me, anything that brings lonely people together is a great thing!

Anyway, I've been around dysfunctional people my whole life, so it's nothing new. So I guess I do sometimes get bored without some insanity.

 

[Twitchy]

The original poster does have a point.

Despite the fact that anyone can post, these forums have never really seemed "open to the public". This place operates the same as any high school would, with tightly knit little groups. If you're not a member of the current lineup of the Mickey Mouse Club, you don't get the benefit of people who are actually willing to listen. In fact, I've spoken to a few people who felt more isolated after leaving than they did when they registered. :/

AND, if you have the audacity to disagree with someone, you'll occasionally get people who speak behind your back and attempt to undermine anything substantial you've tried to convey. I've witnessed this firsthand, so telling me it never happens is futile.

I've left and come back quite a bit, hoping to test the water and see if things have changed. Unfortunately they don't ever appear to.

If you have a serious problem that requires well informed advice, there really are much better places to go. For some reason I still haven't learned that lesson myself. I would hope the majority of you have more common sense than I do in that regard.

 

[PoWer2tHePeOpLE]

i've never joined any forum before and i haven't posted anywhere either (i have seen some other forums though) so i cant say that i am any kind of expert on identifing the dysfunctionality of any kind of forum. for the most part if someone does have a problem i see people doing their best to respond in a kindly and thoughtful manner. many times i havent posted either because someone has already addressed the issue in a way i would and i cant think of anything else to add or i dont really feel like writing or typing and just in the mood to read.

if there is a 'clique' then i havent really noticed.. some people here have been here a while and seem to know each other well but then they dont seem as though they are uninclusive in anyway to me..

er.. what's dysfunctional anyway?

i suppose it depends why you are here and what you expect. i dont really expect anything so if someone responds to anything i write then its a bonus and if not.. no problem.

 

[EveWasFramed]

I wonder if sometimes camaraderie and familiarity are confused with "clique?"

 

[Twitchy]

I wonder if sometimes camaraderie and familiarity are confused with "clique?"

I think people just like to euphemisms that can be used to excuse their behavior.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Oh? You find something wrong with my behavior, Twitchy? I wasn't aware.

 

[Steel]

I think people just like to euphemisms that can be used to excuse their behavior.

A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener. Given this, your sentence seems oddly constructed. What were you trying to say?

 

[Twitchy]

A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener.

Go Wikipedia, go...

Given this, your sentence seems oddly constructed. What were you trying to say?

The words "cameraderie" and "familiarity" were being used to replace "clique", which seems to be the unpleasant term I used.

It shouldn't be that hard to figure out to anyone even remotely familiar with English, even if I used it incorrectly (I didn't). However I suspect this is just an indirect method of telling me I'm an idiot and don't know what I'm talking about. If that's the case, you could have just said it and saved me from having to type a clarification. :/

---

Oh? You find something wrong with my behavior, Twitchy? I wasn't aware.

Where did I say I was referring to you?

 

[Steel]

A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener.

Go Wikipedia, go...

Given this, your sentence seems oddly constructed. What were you trying to say?

The words "cameraderie" and "familiarity" were being used to replace "clique", which seems to be the unpleasant term I used.

It shouldn't be that hard to figure out to anyone even remotely familiar with English, even if I used it incorrectly (I didn't). However I suspect this is just an indirect method of telling me I'm an idiot and don't know what I'm talking about. If that's the case, you could have just said it and saved me from having to type a clarification. :/

While a clique is a selective group of individuals, camraderie and familiarity are not, and since both terms were contained within the original sentence, it cannot be a euphemism. Such a sentence would (obviously) be inherently contradictory, since it would be contrasting two identical things.

Therefore, and since your original reply was presumably inadvertently missing a verb as well, I asked you to clarify the matter.

If (finally) I have correctly interpreted your reply, I presume you are stating that familiarity and comraderie are the same thing as a clique? If so, I disagree - and even if I didn't, I fail to see how any social gathering, in real life or on a forum could contain people who have known everyone for an equal amount of time and to the same degree, unless, perhaps, everyone wore bags over their heads and disguised their voices.

 

[Naleena]

Sometimes you have to be what you want to see in the world. It's easy to gripe and bitch about things but, instead of pointing fingers....sometimes you just need to be proactive and get off your collective ***** and be the change you want to see.

You want a site with more support? Take it on yourself to be the supporter of the people who come here. You don't need a mods hat for that. A percieved click can't stop you from that. You want friendly and interactive? Take it on yourself to be that to everyone who is here. Don't expect change unless you are willing to be that change and don't make up excuses and blame the way things are on other people. No one is holding anyone back from answering posts and supporting other people or trying to be anyones friend. Let change begin with YOU. But alas, I know from experience of being here that only a few choose to do so. There are plenty of complainers and not enough people who will take it upon themselves to make this place better. To everyone who wants this place to be better, I challange YOU to make it better. Post positive things, be the friend you want to find, be the support you wish to recieve. There is so much ME ME ME in this forum. THAT is why this isnt a COMMUNITY. MY feelings, MY loneliness, my this and my that! And then so many wonder why this forum is the way it is. If people could stop for one day, JUST ONE, and forget about thier own selfish desires, and reach out a hand to someone else here, I wonder how that would be? Yet in all honesty, I don't believe it will ever happen. Not because of some friendly group or because of the mods but, because no one wants to take responsibility and I know as sure as I am writing these words...they will go by unnoticed because it is not what most people want to hear. It's easier to balme everyone else instead of taking some responsibilitilty. I would like for everyone here tot ask themselves what have you done for this forum lately? Infact, I am most tempted to make this question a thread.

And Minus, I agree with you. Anyone who wants to see helpful advice should take it on themselves to research the internet and post it.

 

[Twitchy]

While a clique is a selective group of individuals, camraderie and familiarity are not, and since both terms were contained within the original sentence, it cannot be a euphemism. Such a sentence would (obviously) be inherently contradictory, since it would be contrasting two identical things.

There is no rule regarding what can be a euphemism and what can't, given that the context is dependent on what's being discussed. I can substitute the word "toilet" for "eggroll" and it can be completely acceptable usage. There is also no rule that states a euphemism can't be used in the same sentence as the word it's substituting. I don't know where you're getting any of that. Weren't you a teacher? It's possible I'm thinking of someone else.

Therefore, and since your original reply was presumably inadvertently missing a verb as well, I asked you to clarify the matter.

I see. There are people here that can't use a period or spell a word with more than six letters. Funny, I don't see you picking apart their messages.

If (finally) I have correctly interpreted your reply, I presume you are stating that familiarity and comraderie are the same thing as a clique? If so, I disagree - and even if I didn't, I fail to see how any social gathering, in real life or on a forum could contain people who have known everyone for an equal amount of time and to the same degree, unless, perhaps, everyone wore bags over their heads and disguised their voices.

The agreed spelling is "camaraderie". The only place I found that lists it as "comraderie" is the urban dictionary.

Also, your reply is so confusing that I can't tell what you're disagreeing with. I'll make this simple:

Certain people are made to feel welcome. Certain people are not made to feel welcome. This is wrong. Does that make sense? It doesn't matter if you agree with it or not, I'm just curious if it makes sense to you. :/

 

[EveWasFramed]

A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener.

Go Wikipedia, go...

Given this, your sentence seems oddly constructed. What were you trying to say?

The words "cameraderie" and "familiarity" were being used to replace "clique", which seems to be the unpleasant term I used.

It shouldn't be that hard to figure out to anyone even remotely familiar with English, even if I used it incorrectly (I didn't). However I suspect this is just an indirect method of telling me I'm an idiot and don't know what I'm talking about. If that's the case, you could have just said it and saved me from having to type a clarification. :/

---

Oh? You find something wrong with my behavior, Twitchy? I wasn't aware.

Where did I say I was referring to you?

---

WHen you quoted MY previous post. It' was fairly obvious.

 

[Steel]

Twitchy:

Sorry, I cannot be bothered to pick through making the quotes make sense, so I will reply in one go.

Your intepretation of the word euphemism is correct, but totaly ignores the point I made, in that the reply to the original post was overly obscure to me, contradicting the sentence structure as it did. I didn't want to ASSUME you meant something you didn't. Hence the original question -I don't believe asking for clarification is a personal insult, but clearly you found it to be so.

Yes, it's camraderie. I don't bother to check spelling as I go, but I'm glad you felt the need to google it just to check

On to the most serious note, you declare that some people feel welcome, some do not. But.. this is nothing to do with the time they have been a member of the site. Read the forum, and you will see little correlation between the length someone has been here and the number of posts they make. To be brutally honest.. some people ask the forum what it can do for them, and not what they can do for it. It is the former who often feel "left out".

Oh, and coincidentally, I also see no correlation between the grammar/spelling someone uses and their intelligence.

 

[EveWasFramed]

The words "cameraderie" and "familiarity" were being used to replace "clique", which seems to be the unpleasant term I used.

No, they weren't. That isn't what I said at all - you mistake my meaning. Those two words weren't being used to "replace" anything. It was merely my opinion that perhaps people sometimes mistake a group of people who have become friends, due to familiarity and common interests/goals, as a "clique" as you called it.
It meant nothing more, nothing less.

 

[Twitchy]

I can see where this is going. It's going to the place with Twitchy being wrong, regardless of what he says.

I didn't start this thread, so I know it's not just me that has noticed certain problems. I also know it's not just the two of us doing the noticing. So, unless we are all having a mass hallucination, something here is severely wrong. Until someone with authority owns up to it and decides to make some changes, I think you should all expect to have this conversation again...and again.

Also, for the record, I have acknowledged and apologized for every mistake I have made, both here and in real life (and yes, there have been many). If people choose to ignore my apologies, there's not much I can do about it. There's also not much I can do if people choose to ignore the good things I've done (been lots of that too).

You can call off the troops. I'm tired...and done. Sorry I wasted everyone's time.

 

[Steel]

No, we were debating. I don't feel threatened by someone having a different opinion than my own - it would be a boring world if we all agreed

 

[Naval_Fluff]

I've noticed that the debate has strayed far off the course of the dysfuntionality of this site All I know is that if I didn't come across this site I would still be thinking that I'm the only person in the world taht has problems..and that's a pretty narrow(selfish) view...

 

[Twitchy]

No, we were debating. I don't feel threatened by someone having a different opinion than my own - it would be a boring world if we all agreed

Debating is such a barbaric and brutal display...so I had fun.

Enjoy your evening everyone. T-shirts are available in the lobby.