Why Are Some People Plagued with Chronic Loneliness?

[Poueff]

imo,different reasons every time.

I'm confident,I'm smart,I can keep a conversation going,hell I'm a pre-teen version of a PUA (laugh about it,yeah,but tbh it's true),but since my "social status" is low,I can't do **** to raise it cause even if I try to talk in a group (happens most of the time) I'm generally either ignored or talked over.

And I have two options:
-Be a prick and trash everything that stands in my way
-Change places

That's why I hate my school. Not because of the kids,not because of the classes,but because everything is already so fixed it's impossible to change it. And it doesn't help either that I know I'd get so much better in other places,and that I'm praticly made on North American culture. Yeah,I wish I was born in Canada >.> I am basicly the perfect fit for the place,but nooooo,I had to be born in a place rotten with idiotic teens who have fixed ideas (in absolutely every f'n thing,ex: my haircut,it's spiked in the front (see Jake Gyllenhaal) and here I'm mocked for it,whereas there... and I'm a mega Vancouver Cannucks fan) who is in a politic and economic crisis. Way to go Poueff,way to be born in a ********,and it's not even the best part of it,it's the dirtier and scumier part of the hole.

I want to be 21 and in America/Canada/Australia so bad it's not even funny.

PS: Sorry for the off-topic,but I just showed my reasons for being lonely.

 

[Solace]

It goes without saying there are probably a lot of different reasons for chronic loneliness.

For me, I think it started because I was very close to a few friends and then I lost many of them. I learned at a young age the people I thought would be with me forever could withdraw emotionally and seemingly no longer care about you.

I was OK for a few years, I was a resilient little kid. But apparently not tough enough as a teenager, because the depression soon took over until I no longer knew who I was. The friends I had left I withdrew from. I think I spent so long isolating that when I came back into the world trying to make friends, even after I got my social skills back, I still had that wall there.

In short I didn't know how to emotionally connect.

I'm not great at it, but I've finally made a few connections. Sometimes it's not your fault, it's just the timing is off and there aren't like-minded people around. I think there was about a year where I was ready, I had learned what I needed to connect and trust a bit, but I just didn't have the right people.

I think a lot of the time it's about having people that you feel safe around.