Women initiating ***

[Quietude]

So a question to the women on here.

Have you ever been the initiator of *** with a man?

(started the touching, kissing, undressing and such)

 

[TheRealCallie]

Yes

 

[Quietude]

Yes

It may seem like an overly simple question. I really just wonder how often this actually happens in comparison to a man initiating intimacy. If I was to ever find someone and form a relationship, I feel like it would be really nice for the initiation of intimacy to be something entirely mutual.

I fear though that perhaps the majority of women don't. Hopefully this is a bit of a misconception.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I think a lot of women initiate *** when they are in a relationship.

 

[Naizo]

From my personal experience, I've never had *** where the woman didn't initiate it. I've also only been with two women.

I think one time I said hey wanna **** to a chick and she shut me down pretty quick. I was also highly depressed during that point of my life, and after a break up. So yea. Trying to rebound is never fun.

I think once I said "I'm horny" to a woman I was friends with and she said "Me too, let's ****." Does that count as me initiating it? I don't think so. She was a pretty straight forward person, though. For the most part.

A girl flirts with me at work but she got into a relationship, but apparently ended it and came up and whispered into my ear that they weren't together anymore. But I don't really have any interest in a sexual relationship.

I mean I'd absolutely love to get laid, but I don't want to get into a relationship. I'm not ready. So for me, mostly it's always been the woman to initiate anything.

 

[ringwood]

In a long-term, happy relationship here. . . and yes, I initiate ***.

 

[Danielle]

I initiate ***.... not as often as my boyfriend would like... but yes. I do.

 

[harper]

I initiate ***.... not as often as my boyfriend would like... but yes.  I do.

If women were keen about *** as we are, we'd all still be living in caves. 

It'd be excellent.

 

[MissBehave]

Think it’s common for women to initiate ***. Why wouldn’t it be.
I usually have a higher drive than the males I’ve been with. 
But then again, I’m not normal.

 

[SirPanda]

Think it’s common for women to initiate ***. Why wouldn’t it be.
I usually have a higher drive than the males I’ve been with. 
But then again, I’m not normal.

 

[MissBehave]

Think it’s common for women to initiate ***. Why wouldn’t it be.
I usually have a higher drive than the males I’ve been with. 
But then again, I’m not normal.

It’s a true art form. 
Making the wink look sexy and not like your having a stroke.

 

[harper]

It’s a true art form. 
Making the wink look sexy and not like your having a stroke. 

Winking, cheek-kissing and finger-guns say "Hi!  I'm a KNOB."  

 

[ardour]

Given the current political climate, letting women initiate would be the only sensible option.

 

[harper]

Given the current political climate, letting women initiate would be the only sensible option.

Mating is about sensuality, though... not sensibility.  Evolution and feminism don't mix.

 

[MissBehave]

It’s a true art form. 
Making the wink look sexy and not like your having a stroke. 

Winking, cheek-kissing and finger-guns say "Hi!  I'm a KNOB."  

FAIL!

 

[AnonymousMe]

Just out of curiosity ladies, how often do your men (if you have any, this is a lonely forum after all), initiate ***?  Is it less or more often?  Or the same as you?

 

[ardour]

The question assumes women experience enough desire to initiate. Their interest is gererally lower initially, more variable than men's, declining after the marrriage.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/...-satisfaction-is-linked-women-s-sexual-desire

"The authors suggest that women’s sexual desire may function not only to facilitate reproduction, but also to enable pair bonding. They speculate that once couples marry, women may not feel as strong a need for *** to secure their bond with their husbands."

 

[harper]

*** is only part of the experience. I've only been with women <35 yo, but they were as eager as I was, or I wouldn't have been able to carry on with it. Maybe post-menopausal females are different-- I'll let you know.

In any case, it's a lot of fun in a lot of ways. Who wouldn't want to settle in for a night of snuggling with the person you most want to be with in the first place?

 

[TheSkaFish]

Mating is about sensuality, though... not sensibility.  Evolution and feminism don't mix.

^So much this.  I feel like this is a big part of why there's a big discrepancy between what people say they want, versus what they actually go for.

The problem is, of course, when you can't be the caveman they want.  Because of your body, mind/personality, background, and because it doesn't make any sense - because the other side of the coin is, being a caveman and living in civilization don't mix.  It's hard to reconcile the way we're wired, with the modern world.

Not saying women don't initiate or only want certain kinds of guys.  I know exceptions to the rules exist, but that's what they are, exceptions to rules.  At least, that's my experience, and a lot of other guys' experiences too.

I also feel like it's possible to believe both that evolution and feminism don't mix, and at the same time thinking women can go for whatever jobs they want, have their own money, freedom, etc. I'm not necessarily for a return to the old days. I'm just for a little more honesty in terms of what we want and what's expected from each other. And I'm against anything that pushes more confusion.

 

[AlwaysTrying]

Yes I initiate it within a settled relationship, outside that - no