Awkward at work

[wildrice]

Anyone else feeling out of place when they come to work? A mix of social anxiety and 'what on Earth should I say now?' types of feeling I have while at work.
Anyone?

 

[dd11]

I think that going to work involves "putting on your game face". Kind of like you would if you were on a team sporting event, etc. Focus on the work you do. Do it well. And, just listen and take note about what others talk about at the water cooler. If they are all watching American Idol or something, then tune in once in awhile and you can make some small talk.

 

[9006]

While I technically don't have to speak to anyone; I find that when I speak to my supervisor I automatically enter into a mode where I'm upbeat and joke a lot - even if I'm not feeling great. I don't know why I do that.

 

[Triple Bogey]

my work there is always somebody in a mood, at least one. So it's a pain in the arse dealing with that person.

 

[Despicable Me]

Yeah, I'm awkward everywhere. Not a lot of experience with getting to know people and all that. I'm so very horrible at chit-chat, too. Extremely awkward.
I never know what to say the majority of the time, but I still seem to be able to talk to people if I have to.

The biggest problem is not saying the wrong thing to my bosses, because I hate them for the things they've done to me. So I fake some smiles and all that stuff to keep my job.

 

[mickey]

I have general physical awkwardness around intuitive people because it feels like their intuition violates me by enabling them to know things about me that are none of their business and that I choose not to disclose to them. I deal with it by repeatedly telling myself that they don't matter, and that usually enables my body to relax. Worse come to worst, I go somewhere far enough away from them that I can be comfortable again. Ativan has really helped me with this issue as well.

As for work, it's for working. I understand that many people enjoy socializing at work, but socializing with coworkers is not part of the job description, and nobody can hold it against you if you restrict discussions you have with coworkers to work-related matters, especially if your boss can measure your performance as being above average.

 

[lonelyfairy]

Oh yes... When I had a job, it was always awkward to go to a break room in coffee breaks and lunch hours. I didn't never know what to say, so I was usually the only quiet one in the room.

 

[h3donist]

Pretty natural to be awkward at work where people from all walks of life are forced together, and have to at least pretend to get along lest they get fired.

So a degree of social anxiety is quite normal. Some people like me deal with it by putting on my social camouflage and stepping into the building (it has been slipping lately but I think it's a good thing that people sometimes see that I'm actually quite vulnerable) so while I'm merrily bounding down the corridors with glee, heading towards my next I.T support job, I'm actually terrified of them.

 

[reynard_muldrake]

Hmm. At my current job it's not really awkward as I manage to get along well with most people. The main issue is watching other coworkers interact. Many of them have been there a few years, so they'll usually talk to each other or have even socialized outside work frequently. It's hard for me not to feel left out or isolated. Granted, most aren't people I see myself befriending, but that doesn't provide much comfort. Somehow I always find myself in places where this pattern re-occurs.

 

[wildrice]

A big thanks to all of you for your valuable feedback! i can see from your answers I'm not the only one feeling out of place and that others have similar issues.
Much appreciated!

 

[desiderio]

Once upon a time, I was working in one of the worst teams of my working life, with 2 20-somethings that were aggressively bitchy, and a supervisor who thought I was after her job.

One day, said supervisor takes me into the conference room. She says - the girls are concerned about you, they say you've not been yourself lately, seem depressed, not talking much... You know, if there's anything I can help with... blah blah blah blah...

Yes, I had all kinds of issues going on with my life, one being working in a f'd up team of *******, but hey... Made up excuses and remembered to smile more...

 

[surfeit]

My previous job was perfect for me... a chauffeur for an English Lord. The guy didn't talk much and if he did... it was quite a brief conversation. Too bad it didn't work out :/ I failed after the month trial.
Before that and now I was/I'm in catering. Currently I'm a manager at an "italian" restaurant in Cleethorpes (N.E. Lincolnshire).
I'm a quiet person, I like my solitude and when to be sociable (not very often). If someone talks to me first, there is a good chance to get a conversation out of me, but I hardly initiate it first.
As you can imagine working in a restaurant is totally the opposite where you have to be a people's person and keep that same plastic smile with the staff and customers. My working pattern is 4 working days and 3 off. And pretty much once I get in those 4 consecutive days in work (13-14hrs. shifts) I turn a switch and just get on with it. Plus it's easier for me to pretend to be someone else instead of showing my true colors. For some people it might be difficult at first. But once you break that point you can do a lot in conversing with people when you have to and get what you want.
Sometimes I think it might be the fact that my parents are so different apart in mood and connecting with people - and I can just switch between profiles easily.

For the person who started the thread... I get if you feel awkward where your fellow colleagues are discussing stuff from their days off - TV shows that they watched, where they've been and etc. I still feel out of place and find it hard to enter the conversation and I just tend to just move from the discussion and do whatever is on my "to do" list.

 

[jayme89]

I've felt awkward at EVERY job I've ever had. I think its completely normal. Its one of those forced situations that everyone here dreads. I do agree that to maintain decent work relationships requires "putting on a face". Most people I work with would never know how awkward I really feel because I can become very charismatic when I need to be.

 

[Niantiel]

Yes and no.....
Everyone I work with is basically well aware that I am nuts. Heh....I kinda hit a point where I could no longer hide it as well anymore and while there are certain things that I will not discuss, there are other things about me that they have their assumptions about that are incorrect assumptions....and yet I cannot correct them on it due to the nature of it.

I don't really talk much at work, I mostly just listen to music and zone out into working....which is kinda paradoxical because I'm a manager....but, I'm on salary pay, and I HAVE to be there for 10 hours or so....so it makes the time go by faster if I find ways to keep myself busy while also keeping everyone else busy.

There are certain things they talk about that I can't related to. I can't relate to anything movie or television-wise, because I haven't watched them in over 6 years. And I can't really relate to them on levels of local events, because I never go to any either. I'm well aware I'm the oddball, I just don't care. Heh.

I AM however, perpetually the guy that everyone, literally everyone goes to (including the CEO) for a sort of mirror of themselves in a deeper type of a conversation. Which is a little awkward.

 

[Cataplasme]

Oh, I always do. I only had two real works though. One for a year and one for 2-3 months.
It felt unusual to me, like I was pretending to be an adult but I had mostly no idea what I was doing. But hé, in the quality have been told most from work is my capacity to improvise, so there is that !

Funny enough, I lived for one of my co-worker for 2 months (maybe ?) and she said to my other coworkers it was still hard to really know me. I never thought of myself as mysterious before ? I even thought I told quite enough about me.