I too am involved in this stuff, with my approach of choice falling within what is called Insight meditation (vipàssana, 'seeing clearly). It probably consists in objectivizing every little vibration that arises and dissolves, deconstructing the solidity of reality, breaking it into tiny pieces and seeing them clearly to the point that you 'get', in some very physical and profound way, that all sensation that constitute reality don't last for the brink of a second, they never satisfy, and ain't you (these are the three secrets the OP was talking about). The goal of this practice is to let the sense of I fade to its extinction, solving the fundamental problem as well all the superficial. Its means is watchfulness of the mental phenomenon and the way it is brought about may consists in a set of very powerful tools.
I find the way it was presented here a little sentimental and unpractical though, lacking a systematic and scientific explanation that clearly defines what you should do. It's easy to think about befriending your dark emotions, but when you actually lie on your couch and try to do it you realize you don't know how and probably even what. Imagine sitting somewhere befriending your emotions, what do you do? I myself that have some (even very limited) experience with disentangling and breaking down mental phenomena wouldn't have a clue.
I find the way it was presented here a little sentimental and unpractical though, lacking a systematic and scientific explanation that clearly defines what you should do. It's easy to think about befriending your dark emotions, but when you actually lie on your couch and try to do it you realize you don't know how and probably even what. Imagine sitting somewhere befriending your emotions, what do you do? I myself that have some (even very limited) experience with disentangling and breaking down mental phenomena wouldn't have a clue.