Do you admit you're lonely?

[dd11]

You have a wife. Why do nothing on the weekends?

 

[red guy]

I don't. It seems to repel people.

 

[Tricast]

Yes i admit i´m lonely. I´m 41 years old, from Sweden and have lived alone all my life. No Experience regarding friendship or romantic relationships. A little about me...i have good education, job, economy and eat healthy food. I do physical aerobic exercise over 500 hours a year which sounds as an insanely amount. It is but it´s a good tool to keep depression at bay. Besides that i like to read books, hitch hiking and play rpg pc games.

Now...if anyone with same kind of mentality or baggage want to contact me please do. I´m no sociopath, just extremely lonely. I´m open for suggestions.


Best wishes

/Mats from Sweden

 

[stinky_cheese_dude]

You have a wife. Why do nothing on the weekends?

Because a large portion of her work occurs on the weekend. I usually end up helping with that for a small part of the day (walking some dogs at least gets me out of the house), but we can't really go anywhere... If she's not got so much work booked, she'll usually just rest and sleep because of exhaustion. So we don't go anywhere.

 

[tsar]

Yeah I admit to my one friend that I am lonely. He can't believe I have never had a gf or sex at my age.
I want to hold and go for walks with a girl. Or just cuddle and enjoy each others company.

 

[Peaches]

Yes i admit i´m lonely. I´m 41 years old, from Sweden and have lived alone all my life. No Experience regarding friendship or romantic relationships. A little about me...i have good education, job, economy and eat healthy food. I do physical aerobic exercise over 500 hours a year which sounds as an insanely amount. It is but it´s a good tool to keep depression at bay. Besides that i like to read books, hitch hiking and play rpg pc games.

Now...if anyone with same kind of mentality or baggage want to contact me please do. I´m no sociopath, just extremely lonely. I´m open for suggestions.


Best wishes

/Mats from Sweden

Hi Mats, do you have any ideas about why that is happening? you sound like you have everything going for you, including a good attitude.

PS - welcome to the forum

 

[constant stranger]

I echo what Peaches says. You're 41 and no experience with friends or romantic relationships eh? There's a story there I'm sure. I hope you get some friendship and romance before you get too much older. Life isn't that long and I say that as a guy who's about 20 years older than you.

Oh yeah, welcome to the forum and let's hear some more from you.

 

[dd11]

You have a wife. Why do nothing on the weekends?

Because a large portion of her work occurs on the weekend. I usually end up helping with that for a small part of the day (walking some dogs at least gets me out of the house), but we can't really go anywhere... If she's not got so much work booked, she'll usually just rest and sleep because of exhaustion. So we don't go anywhere.

So you have you life companion and you cant make time for each other? You need to change your work schedules. Stop comparing yourself to others. You have what you need right in front of you if u put in the effort.

 

[mari1969]

Only some people know how lonely i feel.
I have friends, but i dont want to be with them, i want a partner.
My whole life i had partners (4 log relations) and now im not, so i feel very lonely.
Since my 13 i live for my partner and my partner for me, their were the priority for me and me the priority for them

 

[dd11]

I think it's a very taboo subject. If you say that, then others who dont' feel that way think there is something wrong with you. So i see nothing to be gained to broadcast that. As I said, I believe that some of us have a deep felt longing and some people don't have that so they don't get it and won't get it even if you explain it to them so what is the point?

 

[lonelyfairy]

I admit I'm lonely for myself but not to others, because being lonely makes me feel ashamed and embarrassed of myself, it makes me feel like a loser, someone who isn't worthy as everyone else are, only because I don't have any friends. It's really hard to tell it to anyone. Only my family knows this.

 

[Xpendable]

I tried to comunicate this some time ago in class, but the teacher changed the subject about loneliness. He said that the worst loneliness is to know you are always alone on your consience; on your mind. But that was not what I meant with this sounds.

Sound Clip

 

[Peaches]

haven't been so alone in my life - if someone asked me, I would answer, but I wouldn't bring it up spontaneously anymore, no

 

[sad potato]

I definitely don't. Not in exact words. But I feel that my feelings seep through. And people seem to home in on the fact that I was alone on the night of the big party or wasn't invited to drinks after work. And then start the passive-aggressive sneers. And finally the pity invites. I abhor the feeling when I realize that I am being pitied. I'd rather be lonely.
Also, admitting that I'm lonely is like admitting I'm defeated. This forum doesn't count because I don't know anybody here in real life. My therapist also doesn't count because I go to her for working out my issues. Both of these are safe places: they are places to heal. But I don't think I can handle the barrage of pity that'll pour down once I admit to something like this to my friends or family.
It might come across as a bit egotistic, but I can't let myself seem so vulnerable.

 

[dd11]

And, saying this will repel people. People seek out friends who make them feel good about themselves or people whom they view have "like mindedness". If you admit to that, that is something that others don't want, so I don't see what is to be gained to discuss it.

 

[Xpendable]

And, saying this will repel people. People seek out friends who make them feel good about themselves or people whom they view have "like mindedness". If you admit to that, that is something that others don't want, so I don't see what is to be gained to discuss it.

That sounds selfish.

 

[dd11]

Huh? I gave you my opinion and what i think others would think about that. So yeah you dont have to agree. Not sure what is "selfish". That is just the way i believe people are.

 

[Xpendable]

A person who prefers his/her own comfort before being mildly annoyed by another's person's struggles can came up a little selfish. Not sure I want a friend that wishes to suppress my feelings just to feel good.

 

[red guy]

And, saying this will repel people. People seek out friends who make them feel good about themselves or people whom they view have "like mindedness". If you admit to that, that is something that others don't want, so I don't see what is to be gained to discuss it.

That sounds selfish.

I think delledonne11 is just stating the fact that we are bio machines. We are hard wired for things to like and dislike. And I agree with her. Your instincts tell you to surround yourself with the "same kind" and as much as possible with the "superior ones". Evolution baby!!!
You might want to argue that it is selfish and what not, but intellect prevails in higher level matters. Rest of the time you are just acting your impulses and reflect what and how you grew up.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I actually see a lot of friends on Facebook talking about being alone/lonely or depressed or what have you.

Honestly, if the people in your life are going to treat you like a pariah just because of that, they don't really care all that much about you, IMO.