Does anyone feel detached from everything?

[fightclub]

Does anyone feel detached like the guy in seven, like the majority of society are just mindless selfish pigs. Like some sections of your life just want to make you throw up they make you so sick when you come across them or some days just feel surrounded pigs all day long no wonder epople are lonely who who want to mix with people?

 

[Fvantom]

I do, all the time, I know I dont belong in this world, Im always feeling like I was born into the wrong world, we all were

 

[Sci-Fi]

God yes, so much yes in there...except I've never seen Seven so I have no idea who you are talking about.

 

[iris]

I don't think people are pigs, they're just living their lives, right or wrong. I'm forever detached, not belonging anywhere, but I don't hate people. I don't understand this attitude, really.

 

[freedom]

i feel that way. i feel like "a pilgrim in a foreign land". i haven't a friend in the world. i have no peace, no patience, everything bothers me.


it's hard being me.

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

Not really like the guy in Se7en (I'm not a sociopathic murderer!) but I do feel like I'm different from everyone else for some reason.

I spend most of my social interactions just wanting to get away so I can be on my own again. Stupid, perhaps. Irrational? Yes.

In particular I feel detached from relationships. I simply look upon them from afar, like a ghost.

It's doubly cruel because I don't even understand why I cannot get a girl of my own. I'm intelligent, I can make people laugh, I look pretty good when I take care of myself...yet profound romantic loneliness follows me everywhere I go. I just don't have the "X Factor" I guess. Being a **** or being super-hot gives you that. I'm not either, so no hugs for me!

I also feel like everyone my age likes to do different stuff to me. All I want, all I've ever wanted is to have a quiet pint of beer with a friend, perhaps dance at a club some other time and have a girl who I can just snuggle up to at the end of the day.

I don't want sex, I don't want drunkenness or loads of cash or to be king of the world, I could go my whole life without that stuff and be happy. I just want to do those simple things.

Unfortunately, no-one else does. So I go unfulfilled for long, long periods of time.

I'm finding myself growing increasingly cynical with people and increasingly unhappy when I have "down" moments, frankly it's a little bit worrying. I'm just very sick of being divided from everyone else though, in my interests, pursuits and singleness.

Hell, I've even dumbed down my intelligence frequently in the past just so I wouldn't be mocked. How sad is that?

So yeah, I guess I feel detached.

 

[fightclub]

No beleave me there are some real pigs out there and this world would be a better place without them

---

TheSolitaryMan hang on in there

I am beyond relationships way beyond

I hope something turns up for you I wont give you any advice on the matter as I dont have any.

I last met someone when once before I hade kind of given up looking I was happy in work with life to a point and the usual three buses at once came along one was a very sporty number like a porche looked amazing but high maintenace one was an average modern car and the other was an unusal import and I went for the easy option but I wish I had taken the others for a test drive first haha

I think also I was working in a big firm with alot of people around and social and was good at my job and was popular this all went in my favour. I think you need to have something going on in order to meet people, but not just for that but for yourself, as soon as I hooked up I dropped everything and then when you get dropped you have to start again.

 

[Evilina]

I think a lot of people want what you want. I know I do. Just simple, easy trust.
I don't know how to start new friendships or relationships. Life is lonely. I've buried three friends and that pretty much drives most other people away. Ive found that most people Make a huge effort to act interested but when it comes down to it I think people are just self absorbed. That or I just don't have a lot to offer.

 

[beans]

It's funny that a lot of people on here say that they are 'different' from the rest in their thinking, beliefs, hobbies, pursuits and interests. I can understand that. But what I can't understand is that what does it have to do with not being able to be part of society and to be mingle around?

Have you ever thought that maybe you are the one who doesn't want to be a part of society irregardless of your interests? Not everybody has the same interests and hobbies but surely they can find ways to be a part of the world. If you say people are selfish, then are you volunteering? Are you giving to the needy (am not talking about money).


Like I said again, everyone keeps saying they are 'different' from the rest and they can't all be because I'm seeing the same thing being said on here by the majority. That they are different in their lifestyle, interests, thinking, beliefs. I don't think that really matters when it comes to having a life. It's not like you're going to marry all these people out in the world. You just want to socialize and make friends. And its possible to be connected and make friends without having all the same interests.

I think it's easier on yourself and on others to accept others who are different to you. Accept them as they are without being too judgmental. With that, perhaps its easier to have friends and to be less lonely.

 

[Outlawstarl337]

In particular I feel detached from relationships. I simply look upon them from afar, like a ghost.

It's doubly cruel because I don't even understand why I cannot get a girl of my own. I'm intelligent, I can make people laugh, I look pretty good when I take care of myself...yet profound romantic loneliness follows me everywhere I go. I just don't have the "X Factor" I guess. Being a **** or being super-hot gives you that. I'm not either, so no hugs for me!

I also feel like everyone my age likes to do different stuff to me. All I want, all I've ever wanted is to have a quiet pint of beer with a friend, perhaps dance at a club some other time and have a girl who I can just snuggle up to at the end of the day.

I'm finding myself growing increasingly cynical with people and increasingly unhappy when I have "down" moments, frankly it's a little bit worrying. I'm just very sick of being divided from everyone else though, in my interests, pursuits and singleness.

i couldn't of said it better my self. i feel that even know i'm a nice , intelligent guy, with a open mind that it's almost impossible for me to create relationships. Hell i'm even pretty good looking though i lack a x factor.

When it comes to women i'm the friend or the one they have interest in for a little while and then it fades almost instantaneously. Not only that the women that i'm not even going after in any way except to be friends on multiple occasions reinstate their no interest in me policy. So i guess i'm just not dating material.

When it comes to getting male companions i find very few i like to hang out with often. I think this manly has to do with the fact my favorite activity when hanging out is talking and bsing well playing games or just doing nothing. I haven't found many people in my age group that like to do that. Most people i've met in my age group in order to hang out you have to have something interesting planned more so then enjoying each others company and that's almost all i care to do when hanging out.

 

[Lawrens]

I don't think the OP applies to me 100%, I don't think everyone are selfish, but I do feel somehow detached because I just don't have the enthusiasm to care about things other people do.

I just don't have the same emotional attachment as some of the people, they're so excited over a film, a video game, they might appreciate what they're seeing, or they could feel badly offended because someone is talking **** about his favorite song.

Watching people on the street being so excited with their friends, they don't care about what others are just there staring at them, and they would be so mindlessly happy that they're not even aware they bumped into me or almost poked my eye out with their umbrellas, they talk so loud as if they're the only people on earth.

I don't really hate people, good for them that they're happy with their everyday life, I would too if I were them, but I feel hollow watching them.

 

[fightclub]

I don't think the OP applies to me 100%, I don't think everyone are selfish, but I do feel somehow detached because I just don't have the enthusiasm to care about things other people do.

I just don't have the same emotional attachment as some of the people, they're so excited over a film, a video game, they might appreciate what they're seeing, or they could feel badly offended because someone is talking **** about his favorite song.

Watching people on the street being so excited with their friends, they don't care about what others are just there staring at them, and they would be so mindlessly happy that they're not even aware they bumped into me or almost poked my eye out with their umbrellas, they talk so loud as if they're the only people on earth.

I don't really hate people, good for them that they're happy with their everyday life, I would too if I were them, but I feel hollow watching them.

I think we are all so different finding your match is so hard especially if you feel worn out and beet up from the bs life serves up. Beans said we are all the same yes in that we are all seeking to find are match no in that we are all the same.

I was watching a video by Gladwell on marketing and how there is no one right product for the very reason people are different, you can tangibly see this in people some tall some short etc and then there is peoples psychological outlook etc we are by no means the same. People look on stereotypes as a bad thing but sites like e harmony put you in these stereo types to try and match you with similar person that you will get on with. I find this type of pigeon whole method very clinical and kind of intrusive but it seems to make sense.

 

[guld]

It's doubly cruel because I don't even understand why I cannot get a girl of my own. I'm intelligent, I can make people laugh, I look pretty good when I take care of myself...yet profound romantic loneliness follows me everywhere I go. I just don't have the "X Factor" I guess.

I also feel like everyone my age likes to do different stuff to me. All I want, all I've ever wanted is to have a quiet pint of beer with a friend, perhaps dance at a club some other time and have a girl who I can just snuggle up to at the end of the day.

I think it's so weird that so many people (including myself) seem to experience the situation like that. I think there's a lot of people, guys and girls alike, who don't care about that "x factor" - you just want someone to be relaxed with. I know that's what I want, anyway. But then I've had a lot of problems through the last years just getting friends and making acquaintances at all, so perhaps I'm no good reflection of what "normal" people are looking for (though I really hope I can still be considered normal, just with a lot of troubles at the moment...). Of course not everyone has the same preferences. But I think a lot of people are interested in the same - just be able to relax together, with someone you think is nice. That's why it's sad such a lot of people seem to have that problem getting beyond that first phase of getting enough interest in each other to hang out again, which you've got to have but where I feel it always goes wrong (and no one can see all the good you really have to offer!).

I've never tried dating, but on top of my mind I'm thinking it's got to be easier to have a lasting relationship if you're simply friends first - then you know you've actually enjoy each other's company, and the romantic part can be a bonus, instead of being the base of the relationship.

 

[fightclub]

I think it's so weird that so many people (including myself) seem to experience the situation like that. I think there's a lot of people, guys and girls alike, who don't care about that "x factor" - you just want someone to be relaxed with. I know that's what I want, anyway. But then I've had a lot of problems through the last years just getting friends and making acquaintances at all, so perhaps I'm no good reflection of what "normal" people are looking for (though I really hope I can still be considered normal, just with a lot of troubles at the moment...). Of course not everyone has the same preferences. But I think a lot of people are interested in the same - just be able to relax together, with someone you think is nice. That's why it's sad such a lot of people seem to have that problem getting beyond that first phase of getting enough interest in each other to hang out again, which you've got to have but where I feel it always goes wrong (and no one can see all the good you really have to offer!).

I've never tried dating, but on top of my mind I'm thinking it's got to be easier to have a lasting relationship if you're simply friends first - then you know you've actually enjoy each other's company, and the romantic part can be a bonus, instead of being the base of the relationship.

[/quote]

freinds first dont mean to seem harsh but life is to breif to be like this I was a bit shy with some girl like this so she just got into some other guy thats the risk you run with this type of thing. If it doesnt work out it doesnt work out why be freinds first, you could then find there into some stuff you aint if you get what I mean and then u have wasted all that time IE physical as well as mental EG mind body and soul!

 

[guld]

freinds first dont mean to seem harsh but life is to breif to be like this I was a bit shy with some girl like this so she just got into some other guy thats the risk you run with this type of thing. If it doesnt work out it doesnt work out why be freinds first, you could then find there into some stuff you aint if you get what I mean and then u have wasted all that time IE physical as well as mental EG mind body and soul!

No, I don't think it should stop you if you like someone, or that you should have it as a strategy to always be friends first.

I can imagine it can help though, if you are a shy person with some troubles feeling comfortable with others, to spare you of some situations where you'd end up feeling rejected and bummed out about it. Since there are so many different types of people, you're bound to not hit it off with quite a lot of them, so in a perfect world, a whole lot less people should take it personal when it doesn't work out. Some people do take it hard though, and I imagine people tend to take romantic rejections harder than when you don't hit it off with a mere acquaintance (a not romantical one).

That's just a reflection though, and nothing I think you should have as a rule. If you like someone, and feel you've got the self-esteem and/or the nerves to be a bit more vulnerable - go for it, I'd say! Good for you to have that sort of thing going Me myself, I'm having enough trouble feeling comfortable simply getting friends, so that's where I'll put my energy at the moment (because it takes energy of me), and let romance be a nice bonus if it would end up like that.

 

[fightclub]

good look to you Glud, what does glud stand for?

I just give up I work kind of alone the ones I do work with dont wana go out so am just stuck. I have even thought about going out alone but am to self concious there is no way round it really pisses me off.

 

[guld]

good look to you Glud, what does glud stand for?

I just give up I work kind of alone the ones I do work with dont wana go out so am just stuck. I have even thought about going out alone but am to self concious there is no way round it really pisses me off.

Guld - just means gold in Swedish

Yeah it's hard. But are you most unhappy about being alone and feeling you need some contact, or is it that you want to do fun stuff but don't have anyone to do it with? I know it's the first for me, anyways. Though I'm so tired of having all these problems and never just having fun with someone.

 

[fightclub]

good look to you Glud, what does glud stand for?

I just give up I work kind of alone the ones I do work with dont wana go out so am just stuck. I have even thought about going out alone but am to self concious there is no way round it really pisses me off.

Guld - just means gold in Swedish

Yeah it's hard. But are you most unhappy about being alone and feeling you need some contact, or is it that you want to do fun stuff but don't have anyone to do it with? I know it's the first for me, anyways. Though I'm so tired of having all these problems and never just having fun with someone.

its just one thing that aint right, I guess, alone is not good for what you mentioned, can cause insanity so enough said, not just partneship but just general social, hard to find your niche if you aint main stream jack the lad or other main stream niche end up out the loop.

 

[sentiententity]

I do feel detached from this world. Like my existence as a human is an error. I try to keep myself in a fantasy world as much as possible, and that helps me from getting too depressed.

 

[aribeth]

I feel detached to the world. Its so ackward to talk to people, what do I say, since my mind quickly draws a blank. With trying to get a boyfriend the same thing. Why is it so hard to have a conversation?! The only one I feel confortable around is myself, and my own thoughts. Most of the time its just the inner quiet. I see others as out there, separate from myself. Thats how it feels like.

I used to meditate and focus on the positive. This would boost my self-esteem. By getting to know myself I could start liking myself. [one's good qualities and character] The goal of meditating was to get beyond the mind chatter and into the silence. Lately its been hard to meditate.

This detachment feels like being in a self contained bubble. Where your world is separate from everybody else. They are there just beyond your reach. And life stands still for you but speeds along for everybody else.
Some people who are loners can live this way all their life and dont miss it at all. I have a brother whos like that, he prefers being a hermit. I find that to being a very selfish life though. I am alone and don't like it one bit! I rather be sharing my life with another. I crave companionship and friendship. It used to be a life with lots of friends before. Before my life was interrconnected with others, not the tiny little self contained bubble. Life is fuller when I had friends, the thoughts and dreams we would share, and the fun times that we had. The only good thing I learned since being by myself is that I got to know myself. I learned to think of myself for a change and to stand alone which takes strength. But its lonely here and as the years past it don't get any easier.