Wow, I can say so much regarding this topic...the first thing I wanted to mention was Steve Buscemi but dammit someone already did that! To me he was always the "freaky guy from 'Fargo'", then last weekend I watched the entire season of "Boardwalk Empire" and darned if I'm not actually finding him a turn on!
Okay, back to the main point I wanted to make is this: what is the definition of "ugly" or "attractive" or "beautiful"...? As one who has spent ten years doing the online dating crap, I think this question needs to be put forth and analyzed. Consider this: I don't think Brad Pitt is attractive. There, I said it. Now most of you women are going to think I'm nuts...but that guy does nothing for me. I'd rather have Adrian Brody, to which many women would say "ewwwwwww"... On these online dating sites I get sooooo many emails and winks from men who state in their profile "I'm a very attractive man..." and I look at the uploaded picture and say, seriously? None of my online profiles include a self-declaration that I'm attractive, because who's to say what attractive is? (And when I don't respond to these "attractive" men they get downright nasty with "how dare you not think I'm attractive" -- but I'll save my online dating horror stories for another thread.)
Twelve years ago I met a guy who was certainly good looking (he even did some modeling), I did some design work for his startup, I was going through my divorce so I was a bit "fragile" emotionally and was a bit blinded by his good looks...he finally came out and told me I'm "out of his league" and that if I want to meet a guy I have to lower my standards because "you're not a 10 so you're not going to land a 10" (he said he considers himself an "8").
In summary, this guy turned out to be the biggest loser I've ever met. I did three websites for him (half the time he wouldn't even show up to work with me on them), whenever one site design was completed the next step was for him to get off his ass and promote his business, but he wouldn't do that -- his priority was getting laid. Then he'd come back with "another great idea to redo the website" and because I was still early in my career as a designer I would do it (and deep down I wanted to believe this business would be a success which I would be a part of; if he had his act together he'd be a millionaire). After the third design he disappeared for awhile (went to South America) and gradually I healed from my divorce; then out of the blue he emailed me saying he wants to start promoting his company again and needs me to redo the website. I responded by saying "It's been five years since I met you...most people go to college and complete a bachelor's degree in that span of time. What have YOU been doing? Getting bj's and goofing off in Brazil." He had no response to that. That was in 2004. He's probably still prancing through life relying on his good looks but I would guess those have begun to fade by now. I'm just grateful he "rejected" me because now I'd be stuck with a lazy unemployed bum to take care of.
What was this post about again? Oh yes, I think what the OP needs is a decent CAREER. Something you do that you love to do and generates income at the same time. Today that is entirely possible. When I graduated high school in 1985 I was pretty much forced to go to a local business college (insert barfing emoticon here). Its a sad story for those in my graduating class who were all in the same boat; this was a small industrial town north of Pittsburgh that was devastated by the steel mill collapse, and all we heard from family to teachers to guidance counselors was "pick a GOOD field so you can get a GOOD job so you won't end up like your unemployed parents." By age 28 I was so miserable with my "career" as an administrative assistant (and the lousy husband wasn't helping matters), I saw an ad for the certification programs at Northeastern U (I'm in Boston now), one was for graphic design, so I took one art course...and I've never looked back. It took a lot of courage to pursue this, especially considering I had no support from either my husband or even my mother. And I still don't know if I can call this gamble a success or not (as I mention in my post yesterday about coping with failure)...my current position is a contract that ends in December, after which point they may or may not renew it...
Is there a character limit here? I've probably gone past that by now...I'll end this by saying use that plastic surgery money towards finding a new career, a course at your local college. That will reward you far more than being able to swoon at yourself in the mirror every morning.
