I Wanted To Say This To You All....

[LoneKiller]

Hey.

I'll get right to the point. The last few months of my life has been complicated due to family and social issues. This has caused me to act a little unusual. Today was a perfect example.

I just want to apologize for this. The easiest thing for me to do is have my account deleted and crawl under a rock and fall into a deep depression. My moods have been up and down which is quite frustrating as I'm sure some of you are familiar with.

Those of you who know me know that I'm a decent person. I'm just going through some rough stuff right now. The last thing I'm trying to do is cause discord. If possible, I would like to wipe the slate clean with those who hate me and continue to be a part of this forum in a fun and positive way. I have my share of problems with some members but I don't hold grudges.

I know that there are some members who want to burn me at the stake. It's unfortunate and I don't like it, but I've learned that no matter how hard I try to fix it, there will always be those that will never like me.

Anyone who reads my posts in the Tech section can tell that I don't know jack **** about the simplest of computer functions. This causes me much embarrassment and I feel that because of this, I'm made fun of behind my back. I can sit down at a ******* chessboard and analyze the positions for hours, but when it comes to computers, I'm clueless.

I often think to myself that I am suffering from paranoia. Seriously.
I begin thinking that I'm not welcome here and am the butt of many jokes behind my back. Members that used to freely exchange pm's with me now ignore me without any reason from them as to why. This only adds to my potential paranoia.

Because I'm polite and try to be a decent person and really do care about others, many think that I'm not for real. That I have some sort of agenda or am hiding something. The same thing has happened in past forums I attended. Why is it so hard for everyone to believe that I'm genuine? I've been a member here for 2 years. If I had any type of agenda, I assure you all that I wouldn't invest 2 years into it.

I know that I have a habit of changing my sigs and avatar too often which annoys many members I'm sure. This is why the new ones I post tonight will be final. With respect to the Issues section, I know that I hardly ever post there.

This is because quite often, I don't know how help effectively, so therefor I refrain most times from posting. It's not because I don't care. I'm just afraid of offering bad advice without the intent to do so, which may cause more problems than it cures. It's because of this I posted all of those megathreads with links to helpful sites that are much more effective than any words I can offer. It's just the best way I know how to contribute.

I just want to be a member who is accepted and not being constantly sized up and analyzed by some members in efforts to find some sinister plot I'm working on in my mind. I'll ask this question one more time. Do you guys want me to leave here? If so, just please tell me and I'll go.

Other than this, I don't know what else to say.


-Jason

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

What in the world happened, Jason?

For the record, I've always found you helpful, friendly, and nice. I disagree with a couple of things you have posted, but that doesn't mean I dislike you. If you are looking for universal appreciation, you will be waiting a long, long time, because nobody ever gets that. Even Jesus Christ had haters.

I also don't get annoyed at you changing your siggy. Another for the record...I miss the most recent one you had up, because it made me laugh. Maybe I have a twisted and warped sense of humor, I don't know.

Anyway, it would be a shame for you to leave. You're one of the few members I'm friends with on here.

 

[Limlim]

What sort of numbers ratio are you looking for here, for a stay / leave amount? Like if 1 person says they want you to go, but 9 say they want you to stay, is that enough to stay? Perhaps you'd be better off with a poll thread?

 

[Okiedokes]

I want you here. I've never thought you were fake or a problem. You have always kept General Topic going and it's nice. You're a nice guy.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

That's what I wonder, too, Limlim.

What did Kurt Cobain say? "It's better to be hated for who you are, than loved for who you are not". Some wise words there.

 

[WildernessWildChild]

Find your sense of humour again

 

[Bob Arctor]

Honestly LK, I think your preoccupation with whether or not every member here likes you is unhealthy. It's egocentric behavior to say the least, and borders on being obsessive. No matter what you do in life, not everyone is going to like you. If you can't accept that I would recommend some counseling.

 

[Badjedidude]

^^^I agree.

**** what people think of you.

Literally.

****. Them.

Have sex with them.

Abstract concepts as they may be, impregnate them with your semen.

And they may bear your children.

ALL HAIL PRINGLES.

 

[perfanoff]

I'll be glad if you stay around Jason, and I don't mind that disagreement before at all

 

[EveWasFramed]

Here's the thing...

Threads like these won't tell you much. People either won't or can't (due to forum rules) respond with 100% honesty if they have something against you. I'm being pretty blunt here, but it's the truth. I know that you've been told (even by me) that you shouldn't base your self-worth on what people on this forum do or do not think about you. You make a decision to stay or leave a place like this, based on what you get from it. Does the good outweigh the bad? THAT is a question that can define almost EVERY situation we deal with in life.

 

[Veruca]

Don't leave Jason! I think its fair to say that there are more people who want you here than ones who don't (they probably don't mind either way for all you know).

Everytime you start feeling paranoid about such things, just think about how there are lots of us here who reply to your threads to show that we care. When people don't reply to PMs, it may have nothing to do with us per say, maybe they are feeling antisocial or upset about things in their own lives that they just don't feel like talking to anyone else.

Everyone of us, no matter how good or kind we are, will always have some that misunderstand, judge and dislike us. The only thing that matters is staying true to your conscience. And if you do need reassurance, then take it from those you consider worth your while (like us ).

In summary. Don't go!

Hugs

 

[LoneKiller]

@ perfanoff. It's ok man. I was just standing up for my father. I'm sure you can understand. I apologize for telling you to go to Hell. I think the mods were some tempted to ban me after all the name calling. I would have deserved it too. But again, it's family I was defending.

I swear to God guys, I think I'm going insane. Although I can't have everyone like me, that fact doesn't soften the blow. I spent too many years hurting the ones closest to me. It took years to get their trust and respect back. When someone doesn't like me, it's uncomfortable. I hate having others dislike me.

What I need is thicker skin. I take what others think of me seriously. Who wants to have people out there that probably groan every time you post. Many people will say that they don't care about what others think of them, but I don't think they really mean it though.

 

[EveWasFramed]

When someone doesn't like me, it's uncomfortable. I hate having others dislike me.

What I need is thicker skin. I take what others think of me seriously. Who wants to have people out there that probably groan every time you post. Many people will say that they don't care about what others think of them, but I don't think they really mean it though.

This sums up the issue perfectly in my opinion. I can also relate to it but at some point, you have to accept that personalities are different and not everyone is going to like you (you, we, us, etc).

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

@ perfanoff. It's ok man. I was just standing up for my father. I'm sure you can understand. I apologize for telling you to go to Hell. I think the mods were some tempted to ban me after all the name calling. I would have deserved it too. But again, it's family I was defending.

I swear to God guys, I think I'm going insane. Although I can't have everyone like me, that fact doesn't soften the blow. I spent too many years hurting the ones closest to me. It took years to get their trust and respect back. When someone doesn't like me, it's uncomfortable. I hate having others dislike me.

What I need is thicker skin. I take what others think of me seriously. Who wants to have people out there that probably groan every time you post. Many people will say that they don't care about what others think of them, but I don't think they really mean it though.

Dude, it's just the internet.

I don't mean to be rude, but you need to grow a thicker skin. If you base your self worth on a bunch of people that you will probably never meet in real lie, then you need to turn off the computer, go outside, and breathe some of the fresh air and realize that life is not really that serious.

 

[LoneKiller]

@ perfanoff. It's ok man. I was just standing up for my father. I'm sure you can understand. I apologize for telling you to go to Hell. I think the mods were some tempted to ban me after all the name calling. I would have deserved it too. But again, it's family I was defending.

I swear to God guys, I think I'm going insane. Although I can't have everyone like me, that fact doesn't soften the blow. I spent too many years hurting the ones closest to me. It took years to get their trust and respect back. When someone doesn't like me, it's uncomfortable. I hate having others dislike me.

What I need is thicker skin. I take what others think of me seriously. Who wants to have people out there that probably groan every time you post. Many people will say that they don't care about what others think of them, but I don't think they really mean it though.

Dude, it's just the internet.

I don't mean to be rude, but you need to grow a thicker skin. If you base your self worth on a bunch of people that you will probably never meet in real lie, then you need to turn off the computer, go outside, and breathe some of the fresh air and realize that life is not really that serious.

 

[Limlim]

Soooo... No poll thread then?

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

You don't need to quote what you said back to me, as if I disagree with what you said? If you already know what the issue is, why not fix it?

 

[perfanoff]

Hi, Inception called

 

[LoneKiller]

Soooo... No poll thread then?

Hi Limlim.
No need for one. Everyone here is right. As much as I dislike it, I can't do a damn thing about others who dislike me so why get into a twist over something I can't change? I just can't believe it took so long to sink in.

 

[Limlim]

I'd sympathize but... I have the opposite problem. Everyone on the forum thinks I am awesome and cool, I even sexually arouse every female member and a few of the men.